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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Rosh Hashana-Yom Kippur
What age do boys start going to selichos?
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Yesterday at 11:11 pm
amother Catmint wrote:
He'll get his sleep a different night. It's so common & normal for a 10 year old to go to selichos. Please don't make a big deal out of it. Let him go if he wants to.
If you're going to want him to want to go when he has to, you have to allow him to go now.
Have to? What's wrong with saying you're too young you can go when you're 12?
If anything I would think letting him go when he's too young can make it lose it's allure for when he actually has to.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Yesterday at 11:15 pm
amother Catmint wrote:
Mom's should also know that most likely nothing will happen if they go to sleep ultra
late one night. This really isn't something a parent shouldn't allow their son to do, unless there's a real good reason for not allowing it.
I think needing sleep is a perfectly good reason.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Yesterday at 11:22 pm
amother Nectarine wrote:
my 10yr old is going this year for the first time. he asked me this afternoon and I said if he naps he can go. selichos at 1am and it's not local so travel time back.
it's hard when you don't know if the kid really wants it or just wants the reward or cool-factor.
For sure the cool factor here
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Yesterday at 11:28 pm
My 12yr old is sleeping. Hubby invited him to come at 12.30am. He wasn't interested. He is excited about the late start and extra sleep
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amother
  Catmint


 

Post Yesterday at 11:31 pm
amother OP wrote:
I think needing sleep is a perfectly good reason.


He'll get his sleep a different night. Going to sleep late 1 night is not reason enough for a parent to not allow their son to go to selichos. (Unless the child has issues and losing afew hours of sleep is really detrimental for them.)
Chinuch is sometimes more important than going to sleep late 1 night. I'm sure you allow him to go to close family weddings, this is just as important. Especially if he's asking to go.
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amother
Beige


 

Post Yesterday at 11:34 pm
My ds is 11 and going to slichos. He said rebbi told them that it's fine if they're all tired on Sunday!
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amother
  Steel


 

Post Yesterday at 11:34 pm
there are reasons to allow a kid to stay up very late
this is one of them
he wants to go
let him

op is he your oldest?
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amother
  OP


 

Post Yesterday at 11:37 pm
amother Steel wrote:
there are reasons to allow a kid to stay up very late
this is one of them
he wants to go
let him

op is he your oldest?
Oldest boy
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amother
Snowdrop


 

Post Today at 12:29 am
I think they started going at around that age, if not then a year later by 11. By age 12 they had definitely gone at least one year.
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Hashem_Yaazor




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 2:49 am
My son's minyan at school is doing selichos then in the morning....
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Today at 3:00 am
Hashem_Yaazor wrote:
My son's minyan at school is doing selichos then in the morning....


Same here, my boys start early for Slichos, I think that's the way it should be.
Staying up till 1am would almost guarantee that he would've missed school today.
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amother
Petunia  


 

Post Today at 3:08 am
My just turned 12 yr old wanted to go at 1am with my husband.
Lately he’s been needing a lot of sleep and is always tired so I didn’t really want him to go.
Especially since I know he will push himself to be in shul all day on rosh hashana.
He told me he wants to go because boys in his class are going and he will feel bad if he didn’t go.
At the end we told him to go to sleep (it was 10:00) and dh will wake him at 12:45. Dh tried a few times but couldn’t wake him up.

He will feel bad in the morning. He even went to sleep with his clothing on because he wanted to be all ready for shul.

Honestly, I don’t think anyone will care if he went or not. Whoever did go just wants everyone else to know that they went. They aren’t really interested in knowing who went and who didn’t.
IyH next year he’ll go and for the rest of his life.
The peer pressure thing is very hard.

Stay tuned for who is fasting on Yom Kippur and who will sleep in the succah.
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amother
  Petunia


 

Post Today at 3:08 am
Hashem_Yaazor wrote:
My son's minyan at school is doing selichos then in the morning....


That’s the best!
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amother
Vanilla


 

Post Today at 3:17 am
amother OP wrote:
Because he needs his sleep? I see no reason for a 10 year old to be up at 1am.

If there was a wedding or Bar mitzvah tonight would you also not let him go because he needs his sleep???
What about seder night and late nights on Shavous?
Once more in the yr won't kill him, make it on condition he goes to bed early on Sunday or rests after yeshivah for an HR.
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