Boss doesn't respect my hours

Notsobusy

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:11 pm

amother OP wrote:

He just called, an hour and a half after our originally scheduled time, and I ignored it.

On the one hand, I said I would be available to meet. On the other hand, my hours are now over and he knows that.

What do I do?

In the future when he schedules a meeting you might want to mention something like, I'll only be available until x time, so I would like to start on time. If he's used to you waiting around for him then he's probably surprised that you didn't answer.

amother

Gladiolus

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:19 pm

If you go to the dr 1.5 hours after your appointment, you wouldn't be shocked if they weren't available to see you. I would just say, im available at 2, and if he calls 1.5 hours later....it's not 2 anymore. Leave a message and call back tomorrow. Even better if you have an offline or after hours answering machine, let the machine tell him you only work the hours you work!

amother

Pear

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:21 pm

“Starting next Monday, my childcare arrangements are changing. I will only be able to work between the hours of 9 and 2. I need to leave immediately after 2 to pick up my child. I know meetings sometimes get delayed, so please keep in mind that anything that doesn’t happen before 2 will need to wait for the following day.”

Cheiny ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:25 pm

Molly Weasley wrote:

You’re absolutely right.

If you’re not comfortable directly expressing your boundaries, you could always say that your husband has set time limits for work.

I disagree. That makes her sound like a child whose life is run by their parent… she’s an adult and has to set the boundaries on her own.

Simply saying she won’t be available during outside hours should be enough. And if the boss doesn’t stick to the time they agreed on, or shortly after, she should make herself unavailable. That will be the only way he learns to respect her time.

↑ Cheiny

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:27 pm

amother OP wrote:

Exactly what you just did. Rinse and repeat. He’ll get the message. He needs to realize you can’t be at his beck and call at any hour of the day. You can be somewhat flexible if he’s a few minutes late but not more than half hour.

amother

Sunflower

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:37 pm

Don't y'all just love these bosses who think our life revolves around their businesses and making them money? Like I get it. For them, it's their whole life to build their business but for me? Na the $40 an hour ain't worth being on call every second.

If he wants you available 24/7 let him pay you for 24 hours a day and don't forget overtime pay.

amother

Cantaloupe

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 6:41 pm

amother Sunflower wrote:

Ha yes I wish!

amother

Winterberry

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 7:05 pm

I would try messaging back if you’ve missed an after hours call saying something like. “Hi boss. I saw you called around 3pm. I finish at 2pm. If it’s an emergency that needs to be discussed now please let me know. Otherwise looking forward to speaking tomorrow.”

That way he has to think about how urgent it really is. If he calls you back and it’s NOT an emergency I’d leave because that means you’re dealing with someone without boundaries who doesn’t care about you.

amother

Springgreen

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 7:35 pm

When he tells you he will call you, tell him you are available until x time. If he calls you after don’t answer, you can text him back sorry you can’t talk now, let’s discuss tomorrow. He’ll get the message after a couple of times. Do not bring your husband into the conversation, that’s unprofessional and immature.
As a boss myself, I take the lead from my employees. Those who tell me to call them, I do. Those who don’t offer, I don’t. If I have an employee that says they’re available anytime and they answer then I wouldn’t know they aren’t okay with it.

cbsp

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 7:43 pm

OP, if you are able to access youtube check out this channel, especially the shorts.
LoeWhaley
@loewhaley
860K subscribers
443 videos

https://www.youtube.com/@loewhaley/featured

I have to tell you that I have watched many of the videos (cannot remember if there is a need for a language warning) and when I watched them I was thinking she is too rigid in her boundaries. However, now I'm seeing there is a time and place for everything and I think you can benefit...

amother

↑ Burgundy ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 8:14 pm

amother Winterberry wrote:

This is opening the door wide for any after hours calls. In his mind, everything is an emergency, it's his business after all and he wants everything taken care of now.
Just make it clear that you aren't available at all after hours, unless you're job is the kind that does have room for after hours emergencies?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 8:18 pm

Thanks so much for all the advice. I ended up sending him an email and he seemed to understand. Now I'm hoping he'll stick to it.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 8:19 pm

cbsp wrote:

I've seen her! She's great. She does come off a bit rigid sometimes, though.

↑ Molly Weasley ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 10:29 pm

amother Oldlace wrote:

This is very strange why blame your husband?

I don't know op, neither do you.

I offered her two ideas, depending on her confidence and capability. She could send a direct text, or if she finds herself lacking the courage, she might gently place the blame on her husband.

I really don't understand your issue.

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 11:29 pm

Molly Weasley wrote:

Its extremely unprofessional. It makes her seem childish ad nit very mature or able bodied.

amother

Clematis

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 11:37 pm

I have a similar situation.
My boss calls me after I leave work sometimes. When he calls after hours I tell him that I’m happy to help but my kids are around and I take his calls while I keep interrupting to talk to my kids.
It gives him the message that I’m dedicated to the business and am willing to help out even when I’m with my kids. He only calls when there’s an emergency because of the background noise.

gottago

Mon, Sep 02 2024, 11:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks so much for all the advice. I ended up sending him an email and he seemed to understand. Now I'm hoping he'll stick to it.

Why "hoping he'll stick to it"?
This is about you sticking to it.
Boundaries are not boundaries unless you enforce them. You did great today. Most likely he'll be late/ call after you hours again. The only way to get your time back is to consistently ignore him outside of your hours.
It might take a lot of reinforcement, but he'll see your serious.

ShishKabob

Tue, Sep 03 2024, 7:31 am

I would send him a message every morning at the start of my work day, reminding him gently that my hours are from 9 till 2. Please bear this in mind when scheduling xyz. Thank you
I don't think it's good to mention childcare because what's if you want to do something unrelated to childcare, you want to keep to your hours.

Many times they simply forget and I don't have to tell you how many bosses don't have a concept of time when it comes to employees. They will notice when you don't clock in on time though. Smile

Good luck

amother

Jade

Tue, Sep 03 2024, 8:27 am

I have employees that work from home in different time zones. I do think I’m really nice and accommodating for allowing it. It’s not easy and not ideal.

I do not want to think three times and do calculations of what time is where before sending a message.

However, I do not expect employees to answer when they are not working anymore. I’ve made it clear to them, and I hope they remember. I send messages when I have something to say, and they can respond when they get back to work.

Your boss seems nice and understanding. Maybe focus on your own boundaries, but it really doesn’t need to be in a rigid or mean way.

If he calls you, send him a message that you logged off for the day, if it’s urgent.

Obviously, if everything is urgent you will need to stop asking that and just say that you logged off for the day.

listenhere

Tue, Sep 03 2024, 8:33 am

Very often business owners work all hours of the day. The lack of time boundaries doesn’t start or end with their employees.

No need to be mean, or to work all hours of the day. A gentle reminder that your hours are done for the day should do.