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Forum -> Parenting our children

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amother

OP ↓

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 3:17 pm

I have a very tricky situation

Please don’t tell me to cut back my job hours that’s not possible

I need to work full time for my family to survive and we are still on benefits

I am a daycare morah. I have a very difficult toddler at home (very bright , special needs) and a slightly less difficult younger toddler (hyperactive boy)

When I come home at the end of the day after taking care of everyone else’s crying and whining kids all day and being so patient and loving to them I have absolutely nothing left for my own

I’ve screamed at her so many times this week and I feel awful after but honestly she is so so so so hard

It feel like there no solution. I’ve tried to switch age groups but no one wants to hire me. The oldest I can get hired for is like prek/ that s honestly exactly the same thing…
It’s getting to the point where I feel like my toddler is getting neglected because I just can’t deal with toddlers 8- 4 and then her faster school (again I think maybe if she wasn’t “special” I could do it but

She physically clings to me and has hysterical whining breakdowns if I try to do anything else. It’s not like normal toddler clonginess it’s like I beee to be holding her constantly or else

amother

Bisque

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 3:19 pm

Can you try to organize yourself so that you really don't have to do anything besides hold her for the first couple of hours after school? This sounds really hard.

justforfun87

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 3:23 pm

Child care seems miserable. I could never do it. Can you find another job in another field?

amother

Indigo

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 3:33 pm

It seems like you need to find a different job.

lovelife7613

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 3:40 pm

So many entry level positions that pay really well. Do you need links to chats? I can help you

amother

↑ OP ↓

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 4:17 pm

lovelife7613 wrote:

So many entry level positions that pay really well. Do you need links to chats? I can help you

OOT?

mha3484

Fri, Sep 13 2024, 4:17 pm

Where OOT are you?

1346

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:19 pm

Ye
It sounds like you could use a break.
Perhaps you can do something in the office of your daycare

amother

Slateblue ↓

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:20 pm

Childcare job isn’t for you. Get another job

amother

Blush

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:23 pm

What about switching to infants , the youngest room they have? Could that help?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:25 pm

mha3484 wrote:

Where OOT are you?

Small enough town that I don’t want to share sorry.

Everyone will immediately know I’m trying to leave my job

Anyway anyone can share links without me posting identifying information?

amother

Clover

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:27 pm

I agree with those saying to switch jobs. But also is it possible to wear your child while doing things for an hour?

I'd even consider giving her screen time for the time you need to unwind so that you can recover and then give her your full attention. Plan what you need to recover, set a clock, give her a show and do your thing.

I know people hate screen time but if your only other option is losing your mind that you're screaming at her, my belief is that screen time is better.

amother

↑ Slateblue

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:28 pm

amother OP wrote:

Small enough town that I don’t want to share sorry.

Everyone will immediately know I’m trying to leave my job

Anyway anyone can share links without me posting identifying information?

What kind of links are you looking for?

thegiver

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 10:40 pm

Can you do laundry and cook the night before so your time after work can be bonding time. Rav matisyahu Solomon says children are Rachmanus cases when they come home from school.

amother

Amaranthus

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 11:02 pm

For some reason I don’t believe switching jobs will solve the problem. You’re exhausted and burnt out from your challenging child, not necessarily from your work.

amother

Orange

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 11:10 pm

amother Clover wrote:

This. Screen time is infinitely better for your child than being yelled at over and over by her mother.

Hugs! Parenting is so so hard and all consuming. I would never be able to do it after spending my workday caring for other people’s kids. An office job would hopefully be a lot better for you.

amother

Garnet

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 11:23 pm

When I was in a similar situation, I switched to an office job that was longer hours but easier than childcare and I came home so much calmer. Taking care of kids takes a lot out of a person, especially in a classroom setting where you need to be “on” and patient all the time.

amother

Tomato

Sat, Sep 14 2024, 11:24 pm

Can you get some respite care around the evening time
Or can you finish half HR earlier so u can have down time before she comes home

ShishKabob

Sun, Sep 15 2024, 10:20 am

amother Clover wrote:

This sounds like a good idea. I hope it works!

amother

↑ OP

Sun, Sep 15 2024, 12:10 pm

Screen time is a good ide. I held out this long but better that she should watch an hour of toveedo than have a mom who’s completely lost it.

She loves the baby carrier. It’s just tricky because my younger toddler (15 months) is a crazy super high energy boy and just does not stop. I have to chase him from waking up till bedtime! BH” he should be the worst of my problems but together they are kind of unmanageable

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