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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Twins, Triplets, and more
someone613
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Wed, Nov 12 2008, 12:44 pm
just wondering if you guys had help with your twins when they were babies? was anyone a stay at home mom or working? if you were staying at home, did you still have some help, hired or family?
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imokay
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Wed, Nov 12 2008, 4:36 pm
oh yeah. best investment ever. I was stay at home mom and had live in help for a year. dh has pressure filled job so rarely helped. basically it was me and the hired help.
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Fox
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Wed, Nov 12 2008, 4:51 pm
I worked part-time when my twins were babies. In addition to a babysitter during the hours I was at work, I had a woman who stayed with them three nights a week so I could sleep. This lasted a few months -- until they were sleeping through most of the night.
You will absolutely need help of some kind, at least at first. It can be a family member, etc. But it's a mistake to try to go it alone. DH and I learned that the hard way!
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lubaussie
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Wed, Nov 12 2008, 8:04 pm
I hired a full-day (but not night) proffessional babysitter (adult). She came most days of the week.
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someone613
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Wed, Nov 12 2008, 8:18 pm
Where you also home with your babysitter? was this your first? what did you do when the babysitter was there if you were home/not working? how did you find a babysitter and know she could handle the twins? I know so many questions..
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RachelEve14
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Wed, Nov 12 2008, 11:27 pm
Nope. I was a SAHM and with them by myself from day 1 (well from when they came home from the hospital, days 7 & 10). I was in Sem. before and the girls came by a few nights in pairs to help me out in the evening, but it was just holding a baby for a little bit so it didn't realy help, but they wanted to come and do the chesed and the company was nice
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mummy-bh
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 4:52 am
I'm a SAHM. I have 6 older kids, one of whom was home all day until the babies were over a year. I had a night nurse so that I could sleep, for about three months until the twins slept about 8 hour stretch overnight. This was my lifesaver. I had no other outside help, and only 3 hours cleaning help a week. We get by, B"H.
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myfriends715
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 9:04 am
after 3 sleepless weeks (kids woke every 2 hrs to eat ate for an hr then the next 1 ate so maybe 15 min break all together to sleep xuz by the time they finished eating it was time to eat again) we hired a night nurse for a while..by day it was just me and the twinies but at night at least I could usually sleep
I went back to work PT at 2 months (it was the best thing for my sanity)
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shalhevet
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 9:33 am
mummy-bh wrote: | I'm a SAHM. I have 6 older kids, one of whom was home all day until the babies were over a year. |
Sorry, I hope I'm not intruding by asking, but I'm just curious. Do you mean you kept the same one home, or by rotation? Or that they were home anyway for another reason (like homeschooling)?
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ChutzPAh
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 9:42 am
She probably means that she had a toddler home too.
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mummy-bh
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 10:13 am
shalhevet wrote: | mummy-bh wrote: | I'm a SAHM. I have 6 older kids, one of whom was home all day until the babies were over a year. |
Sorry, I hope I'm not intruding by asking, but I'm just curious. Do you mean you kept the same one home, or by rotation? Or that they were home anyway for another reason (like homeschooling)? | This made me laugh! Sorry!
Chutzpah is correct; I had my toddler home with me.
Although I have been known to give the kids an occasional "TLC" day, ie a day off school by themselves to spend a bit of mummy time alone. Each kid gets about one of these per year!
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someone613
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 10:35 am
thanks for all the responses! how do you all feel about stay at home moms getting some outside help/babysitter a few times a week to just get some alone time, shopping ect.. I'm thinking of doing it, but part of me feels guilty.
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mummy-bh
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 10:43 am
I went through a phase when the babies were about 4 months old, when I did this because I was starting to feel very cooped up in the house. I could go a whole week without stepping out of my front door, and it was starting to really get to me.
I hired a trusted girl to babysit the twins for a couple of hours, and did various thing with the time. I went out with my toddler, went out alone shopping, or even used that time to book a dentist appointment. I did this once a week for a couple of months.
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shalhevet
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 10:45 am
mummy-bh wrote: | shalhevet wrote: | mummy-bh wrote: | I'm a SAHM. I have 6 older kids, one of whom was home all day until the babies were over a year. |
Sorry, I hope I'm not intruding by asking, but I'm just curious. Do you mean you kept the same one home, or by rotation? Or that they were home anyway for another reason (like homeschooling)? | This made me laugh! Sorry!
Chutzpah is correct; I had my toddler home with me.
Although I have been known to give the kids an occasional "TLC" day, ie a day off school by themselves to spend a bit of mummy time alone. Each kid gets about one of these per year! |
Sorry, now I think it's funny, and it just shows how you can totally misread things. The thread was about help, so I kind of imagined a 10 or 8 year old at home helping you (I remembered you don't have an 18 yr old daughter or something.) Read it again and you will see how an idiot like me managed to get the wrong end of the stick.
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mummy-bh
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 10:49 am
Nah, I packed my 10 and 8 yr old dds off to school. I think they needed to get away from the house It was my 2 y.o. dd I kept home. Well, she had to learn how to change a nappy at some point, right?
(But Re-reading my post, I can see what you thought I meant!)
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bandcm
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 5:39 pm
Its funny how our needs/expectations change.
My sister and brother (twins) are 21 years old. When they were born, my parents had 4 other kids, the oldest of whom was 6 years old.
There was no night nurse.
There were no bottles or formula.
There was no helpful grandma or aunt.
There was no paternity leave!
(There was no money.)
There was a sem girl once a week for 2 hours at supper and bath time.
My mother went back to work at 4 or 5 months postpartum (I dont remember exactly, I was 5 at the time).
If I would have twins now, you bet I would expect all of those things! (I dont know whether Id get them, but Id feel hard done by if not).
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Raisin
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Thu, Nov 13 2008, 7:25 pm
bandcm wrote: | Its funny how our needs/expectations change.
My sister and brother (twins) are 21 years old. When they were born, my parents had 4 other kids, the oldest of whom was 6 years old.
There was no night nurse.
There were no bottles or formula.
There was no helpful grandma or aunt.
There was no paternity leave!
(There was no money.)
There was a sem girl once a week for 2 hours at supper and bath time.
My mother went back to work at 4 or 5 months postpartum (I dont remember exactly, I was 5 at the time).
If I would have twins now, you bet I would expect all of those things! (I dont know whether Id get them, but Id feel hard done by if not). |
You know your mother is Superwoman?
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mummy-bh
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Fri, Nov 14 2008, 4:52 am
Raisin wrote: | bandcm wrote: | Its funny how our needs/expectations change.
My sister and brother (twins) are 21 years old. When they were born, my parents had 4 other kids, the oldest of whom was 6 years old.
There was no night nurse.
There were no bottles or formula.
There was no helpful grandma or aunt.
There was no paternity leave!
(There was no money.)
There was a sem girl once a week for 2 hours at supper and bath time.
My mother went back to work at 4 or 5 months postpartum (I dont remember exactly, I was 5 at the time).
If I would have twins now, you bet I would expect all of those things! (I dont know whether Id get them, but Id feel hard done by if not). |
You know your mother is Superwoman? | Also, she told me that for the first 6 months, she didn't sleep for more than 2 hours at a stretch!
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bandcm
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Fri, Nov 14 2008, 9:17 am
I forgot to mention that she did have a tzadekes of a five-year-old daughter.
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someone613
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Sun, Nov 16 2008, 10:49 am
I still don't know what to do.. if I get help I feel guilty, if I don't I feel like I have no breaks/never able to get out!
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