Arfid child? | Imamother

amother

OP ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 8:20 am

Has anyone been successful at helping their child with arfid? I’m wondering if it ever gets better. Especially curious if anything other than exposure therapy helped if caused by anxiety
Thanks in advance!

amother

Blush ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 10:52 am

Yes.
A combination of play therapy, a dietician who explained to the child what food does and how it works and a really good occupational therapist who focused on sensory.
Plus a lot of hard work at home.
He's gone from eating about 5 foods to eating about 15 but he's open to trying new foods now which he wasn't before and he's no longer starving and complaining of weakness and headaches all the time.

To the previous amother - not everything is about inflammation and gut health. Some things have a sensory and emotional cause.

amother

↑ Strawberry

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 10:54 am

amother Blush wrote:

Inflammation causes sensory and emotional disturbances

amother

Blonde

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 11:55 am

Please get to a specialist that practices eating disorders as a specialty.
Please make sure that you take care of it when they are young, as it won't go away on its own- it will get worse and effect their future.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 12:27 pm

amother Blush wrote:

Thank you
We don’t think it’s from inflammation. We already spoke to our doctor about that and we are looking to go with the therapy route as there is a real obvious sensory and emotional component.
I am going to look into sensory ots but I’m not sure what kind of play therapist to look into, or what the goal of play therapy would be. We talk about the importance of healthy food but it doesn’t translate from abstract concept to practical application Sad

What kind on work are you doing at home that is helping?
Right now we see a specialized feeding therapist. I’m concerned that it’s making it even worse because it’s extremely hard for my child

amother

Turquoise ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 7:36 pm

amother OP wrote:

Anyone have any experience with a feeding therapist making the problem harder/more traumatic?

My child had ARFID. I have a few threads on here about the journey.

I thank Hashem we are out of it.

The therapist that we went to was amazing bh. She did Family Based Therapy.

In retrospect I think that giving more power over the food choices for the child would be a great addition to what we did and might have been less traumatizing for this child.

Once the child comes back to regular health you can work on broadening the choices.

Back then I was so scared my child will die I couldn't focus on anything more than making sure this child eats and eats some more.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 9:22 pm

amother Turquoise wrote:

Do you mean letting the child pick what new foods they are being exposed to?
We are not progressing to really eating anything new as a real food and we feel like we are making it more traumatic by forcing bites

amother

↑ Turquoise

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 8:19 am

amother OP wrote:

Lets say My child liked tuna sandwiches from the grocery.

In retrospect in would rather let the child eat 3 sandwiches a day rather than making her eat lasagna or whatever it was.

Getting the child to eat an entire tuna sandwich 3 times a day is more important than having the child eat more types of foods.

But at the time I wasn't so self assured to think for myself.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 6:33 pm

amother Turquoise wrote:

I would love to do this. But then I read the comments saying to get help asap, and this is what the therapist recommends (forcing small bites/working on it) so it’s so confusing Sad

some people say if I don’t take care of it now it will make it terrible when they are older.

If I force dc I think it’s damaging, if I don’t I think it will get worse and worse

amother

↑ Blush ↓

Yesterday at 8:47 am

My son's therapist recommended never ever forcing.
Her first step was that I should teach him to cook the few foods he likes.
I was so skeptical but it really worked.
Then he got fed up of cooking just curly pasta and plain white rice so he asked me for a new recipe.
Slowly he is expanding his repertoire.
If he cooks it, he'll lick his fingers, then taste it, then eat it.
I find it easier with new, new foods rather than foods that he has already decided he doesn't like.

But my son never limits the amounts of foods he likes. He'll eat 3 big bowls of plain pasta but he never eats a protein. It was more a problem of being so limited that his bone saturation levels were down and his iron was really low. Plus if he wasn't in the mood of one of the foods he likes, he would literally starve himself to the point of having headaches, being tired all the time and throwing up from being too hungry.

We're still at the beginning of the road but between empowering him to make his own food choices and working intensively on the sensory piece, we can already really see an improvement. Especially in that he has started sleeping through the night (age 8). Until now he would wake up hungry at night 3 or 4 times.

amother

↑ Blush

Yesterday at 8:51 am

I also have a new mantra.
When he used to cry that he's hungry, I used to offer him a million things, cook him what he liked etc.
I decided it was giving him too much attention. So now, when he says there is nothing he can eat, I smile at him and say, You know what? I'm going to be mevater to you. If you don't want to eat, I'm going to let you not eat.
At the beginning he thought I was crazy. but when he saw that I was really not going to get involved and beg him to eat, he started helping himself to something rather than trying to engage with me.

So my new mantra is: It's your right not to eat. I'm an amazing mommy because I'm not forcing you. Yay for me!

amother

↑ cornflower

Yesterday at 10:07 am

Similar to poster above I also stopped accommodating and making her few select foods I let her make whatever she wants but I dont have it made always like I used to. I keep house fully stocked with variety. Everyone is encouraged to try although I really shifted focus away from that daughter im not forcing her to eat but im not a short order cook either. I dont get involved in the drama. If she complains shes hungry I empathize “its hard to not have the foods you like” therapy helped her understand that food is to nourish and to live not necessarily to enjoy it. Also worked on anxiety/ control. I dont get into power struggles this was a big deal for us.
Eta I also dont bend over backwards to carry the exact brand of the exact food she will eat. For example one her primary foods was french fries but it had to be a certain brand or from a certain store. I would just aay the store didnt have it today or I forgot to buy it. There would be lots of tears and drama but really distracted myself and didnt get sucked into trying to solve the problem.

amother

Begonia

Yesterday at 11:47 am

I do "force" tasting new foods. I have the preferred food and he can have it after eating one bite of the not preferred food. Over the years his menu has expanded so much more that I don't have to bring his two foods with me wherever we go. It's much easier to just give in but then my son never gets to discover foods he didnt know he likes and my life doesn't get any easier.