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-> Parenting our children
-> Teenagers and Older children
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PinkFridge
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Fri, Nov 08 2024, 9:41 am
Sewsew_mom wrote: | You're doing the right thing.
And also he's telling you why he doesn't share with you things.. Think about it. |
OK, she makes big deals of things. She needs to tone it down. But right now, this is something that DOES need to be made a deal of. She can tell him, I hear you and I'm going to work on it. Try to trust me when I do act on it.
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PinkFridge
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Fri, Nov 08 2024, 9:41 am
amother Marigold wrote: | It’s not on her. Many kids are people pleasers and only want to make their parents happy, not because they have a bad reaction they just don’t want to talk about unpleasant things. It’s a personality. |
Good point. But I think what I just said can still be helpful.
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Molly Weasley
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Fri, Nov 08 2024, 9:43 am
What does the school say?
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Sewsew_mom
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Fri, Nov 08 2024, 9:43 am
PinkFridge wrote: | OK, she makes big deals of things. She needs to tone it down. But right now, this is something that DOES need to be made a deal of. She can tell him, I hear you and I'm going to work on it. Try to trust me when I do act on it. |
Never a need to make a scene in front of a child and react crazy.
Yes. It's so important to be handled appropriately and taken care of. I don't even know where anyone got the message that I said it's an overreaction and not to be taken seriously. It absolutely is serious. And also this child doesn't feel safe sharing something so huge. That's the part I brought up on the side.
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amother
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Fri, Nov 08 2024, 3:47 pm
Let's not get caught up on me and my reactions. That's not the main issue here.
I don't overreact except when it comes to physical violence. There were two minor cases in middle school where I intervened and stopped the bullying behavior immediately which is probably why he didn't want to tell me now. They were very minor situations in middle school and I am glad I said something so it didn't escalate.
This is an entirely different level. I believe my son didn't tell me anything because he knew I would get involved and possibly the situation would get worse. Now that he sees I kept him home and I am protecting him I am seeing him feeling much freer and happier. Sometimes kids are afraid that reporting it will make it worse for them.
I reached out to the school and am dealing with it. I hope they will address it correctly. If not, we will have to explore other options possibly another yeshiva.
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amother
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Sat, Nov 09 2024, 11:54 am
amother OP wrote: | Let's not get caught up on me and my reactions. That's not the main issue here.
I don't overreact except when it comes to physical violence. There were two minor cases in middle school where I intervened and stopped the bullying behavior immediately which is probably why he didn't want to tell me now. They were very minor situations in middle school and I am glad I said something so it didn't escalate.
This is an entirely different level. I believe my son didn't tell me anything because he knew I would get involved and possibly the situation would get worse. Now that he sees I kept him home and I am protecting him I am seeing him feeling much freer and happier. Sometimes kids are afraid that reporting it will make it worse for them.
I reached out to the school and am dealing with it. I hope they will address it correctly. If not, we will have to explore other options possibly another yeshiva. |
Sounds like you're handling this really well! You got this!
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