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-> Working Women
amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:20 pm
I work from home and have set hours during which I'm "available". However, my boss is very loose about his time and will sometimes call me later in the afternoon, well after my hours are over. Other times (like right now), he'll say he wants to talk at a certain time and then be delayed over an hour, into the end of my hours. This means that if I had plans to leave the house, I now have to wait glued to my computer until he calls.
How do I communicate to him that my hours are what they are and I'm not available for spontanteous tasks/meetings after them? Fine if he wants to schedule a meeting, but then please don't be late.
I do my best to be respectful of other people's time. Is it too much to expect that towards myself? It's also very important for me to maintain my work-life balance and not have one bleed over into the other.
Also, my baby will be starting daycare next week, so I definitely won't be available after my hours.
Any suggestions for an email or text I can send him?
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Molly Weasley
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:32 pm
You’re absolutely right.
If you’re not comfortable directly expressing your boundaries, you could always say that your husband has set time limits for work.
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Molly Weasley
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:34 pm
The text can be somthing like this
Hi,
Im currently offline for the evening. I’ll review and respond to your message first thing tomorrow morning.
Thank you for your understanding!
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singleagain
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:36 pm
Molly Weasley wrote: | You’re absolutely right.
If you’re not comfortable directly expressing your boundaries, you could always say that your husband has set time limits for work. |
It's really unprofessional to bring your husband into your work situation.
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:38 pm
I had the same.
I tried being really strict and she just didn't take it, she needed it done then and it didn't matter to her that I was serving supper to my toddler.
It was one of the main reasons I ended up leaving.
I hope you have better success.
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amother
Slategray
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:39 pm
Just say that once the school year starts you won’t be able to be as flexible as you’ve been until now because of childcare. So he should please make sure that any meetings or phone calls are finished by X time, or you’ll deal with it the following morning.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:40 pm
Molly Weasley wrote: | The text can be somthing like this
Hi,
Im currently offline for the evening. I’ll review and respond to your message first thing tomorrow morning.
Thank you for your understanding! |
Thanks. I'm looking for something a little broader, like "going forward, I won't be available between x and x".
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:41 pm
amother Dodgerblue wrote: | I had the same.
I tried being really strict and she just didn't take it, she needed it done then and it didn't matter to her that I was serving supper to my toddler.
It was one of the main reasons I ended up leaving.
I hope you have better success. |
Oh no, sorry to hear that! That must've been tough.
Overall, he's pretty understanding about timing, but just needs it laid out. Like I need to remind him.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:44 pm
I ignored his calls and texts that came after hours. In the morning when he'd ask me about them I'd say, you called? Oh I'm sorry, I don't pick up work related calls after hours.
of course my job is one that doesn't need me to be be available for after hours emergencies so it worked.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:48 pm
My working hours are between x and y. I will only be available for work during those times and be unable to deal with calls outside these times. Thank you for your understanding.
Then going forward you reply if he does send or try calling outside those times, something like, I am unable to take your call at this time as it is outside my working hours. I am available between x and y.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:54 pm
He just called, an hour and a half after our originally scheduled time, and I ignored it.
On the one hand, I said I would be available to meet. On the other hand, my hours are now over and he knows that.
What do I do?
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:56 pm
amother OP wrote: | He just called, an hour and a half after our originally scheduled time, and I ignored it.
On the one hand, I said I would be available to meet. On the other hand, my hours are now over and he knows that.
What do I do? |
Nothing.
if he brings it up tomorrow you tell him it as after hours and you weren't available anymore.
Sometimes that's the only way they learn.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:56 pm
amother OP wrote: | He just called, an hour and a half after our originally scheduled time, and I ignored it.
On the one hand, I said I would be available to meet. On the other hand, my hours are now over and he knows that.
What do I do? |
Don't ignore. Send him a text saying you saw he called, but you're offline for the rest of the day. Ask if he wants to reschedule for tomorrow during work hours.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:57 pm
amother Burgundy wrote: | I ignored his calls and texts that came after hours. In the morning when he'd ask me about them I'd say, you called? Oh I'm sorry, I don't pick up work related calls after hours.
of course my job is one that doesn't need me to be be available for after hours emergencies so it worked. |
I really don't think lying is the bwst tactic. You know he called, he knows you saw his call. Just say you don't pick up work calls after hours rather than playing dumb.
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amother
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 2:59 pm
amother Hydrangea wrote: | Don't ignore. Send him a text saying you saw he called, but you're offline for the rest of the day. Ask if he wants to reschedule for tomorrow during work hours. |
Did that. Thanks.
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amother
Beige
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 3:00 pm
Can't you set your email and calls to do not disturb or only during work hours? Get a personal phone number that isn't used for work. Problem solved. You are only available during your preset hours. I would follow up with a email that states per the terms of your employment, these are you regular business hours. Calls or emails outside of those times, unless scheduled 48 hours in advance and confirmed as accepted, will be returned on the following business day. Thank you for you cooperation with this matter.
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shabbatiscoming
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 3:00 pm
Molly Weasley wrote: | You’re absolutely right.
If you’re not comfortable directly expressing your boundaries, you could always say that your husband has set time limits for work. |
That makes a woman seem like a kept wife. And there is no positive to that.
Dont use your spoude in this way. It does not look professional at all.
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amother
Oldlace
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 3:19 pm
Molly Weasley wrote: | You’re absolutely right.
If you’re not comfortable directly expressing your boundaries, you could always say that your husband has set time limits for work. |
This is very strange why blame your husband?
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tichellady
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 3:24 pm
I would set up a time to talk. Tell him that you need to want to discuss your hours for this year and say that you are unable to work outside of your hours. Then Stick to that.
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Raizle
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Mon, Sep 02 2024, 5:23 pm
amother OP wrote: | He just called, an hour and a half after our originally scheduled time, and I ignored it.
On the one hand, I said I would be available to meet. On the other hand, my hours are now over and he knows that.
What do I do? |
Nothing. He asks why you didn't answer his call, you reply because he didn't call, because officially he didn't. He answers that he did, you ask when?
"Oh then? I finished work already. I was expecting your call at X time"
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