Dh ruined my credit score

imasinger

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 4:10 am

amother Begonia wrote:

This. It's even more concerning to not have access for the accounts under your own name.

You should never relinquish control for anything under your own name. And you should keep tabs on your credit score to ensure that your identity and accounts are secured.

Nevermind the concern about a dh secretly messing things up for a wife or hiding stuff from her. But ch"v something happens to a dh, how will the wife be able to gain access to the accounts?

OP, your setup is a recipe for trouble.

I agree.

How is it reasonable to say, "I am the man, and will pay for everything", when he's not the one actually paying?

How is it beneficial to say, "you're not allowed to know what's going on with our finances "?

My first reaction would be to say to DH, "Everyone makes mistakes, I completely understand that. However, this mistake made me realize that I am not comfortable being left in the dark with financial matters that affect me. If anything should happen to you, chv"sh, I need to know what's going on.
I am not interested in giving you a hard time, just in being aware. From now on, I want us to _____ [fill in the blank with a reasonable request, like sit together every week and go over finances together]."