Are you chic and overweight?

amother

↑ Celeste

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:14 pm

amother Indigo wrote:

Can you explain to me how this works?

I'm not objectively large at all (under a size 6). But I have nursing breasts and baby belly and I just don't get how to dress. I see lots of women my age who are larger than me wearing cute ribbed t-shirts that do exactly what you say - they fit but don't cling. But everything I try on goes like this: (S) obscene -> (M) obscene -> (L) obscene -> (XL) huge and boxy. Including with shapewear, which I don't want to wear on a regular summer day. So what can I wear that will fit but not cling? How do I figure this out?

Get the xl- take a hair elastic and pull the shirt until it fits the way you would like. Gather the excess fabric and tie up with the elastic so that you have a kind of "tail" at the back bottom hem of the shirt. Tuck it into the back of your skirt and voila. You can also do the "tail" at the the side or even in the front to create a flattering shirred look. You need to play with this a little to get the hang of it but it can really make loose, shapeless shirts much more flattering without becoming skin tight.

There are tons of shirt tucking hack videos on line which show you how to do this.

amother

↑ Thistle

Fri, Jun 21 2024, 5:55 am

The problem with fitted is that I don't stay the same size all the time, if I gain a few lbs now they are too tight.
Also I am smallest at my waist so in order for things to fit well in other areas, I need to buy larger. I can do shirts and skirts for weekday but I haven't mastered shabbos shirts and skirts. In my community everyone wear dresses for shabbos.

amother

DarkYellow ↓

Fri, Jun 21 2024, 3:16 pm

amother Mimosa wrote:

How do you work out what style is best for you??

Im short and Iv gained quite a bit of weight.
My behind is very big .
I used to think that getting a new bra would change everything because my waist is narrowish, but it didnt work this time.
Iv also grown a cup size or 2.

Im gaining weight ONTOP of my stomach like ontop of belly button and higher.

All my dresses that I had altered to fit me well, are all too small:(
Like literally I need to move onto the next size like toddler.
Not flattering anymore.

How do I know what styles look good??

Thank you.

. Sounds like you could benefit from a longline bra that smoothes the midriff, which is the part of the body you're referring to. And if you gained a dress size, trying to squeeze into your old stuff isn't fooling anyone. Time to bite the bullet and acquire dresses that fit the body you have now. Nobody sees the size label, and if you're really bothered by seeing the new number, feel free to cut the size label out after you buy the dress. Nobody, and I do mean nobody, even a thin person, looks good in clothes that are too tight. I see so many women who are perfectly fine weight-wise but are showing the world every little bulge, when a size larger would skim their figure and keep the bulges secret. Shape is more important than size. Better to look a tad bigger around but in good shape than advertise how tiny you are while revealing exactly how imperfect your shape is.

amother

↑ DarkYellow ↓

Fri, Jun 21 2024, 3:32 pm

amother Thistle wrote:

A good seamstress can take in the waist so a dress will fit properly everywhere. Ask her to leave the dress loose enough to skim your body, not hug it, so that an extra pound or three won't make it unwearable. For Shabbat, consider suits, which are dressier than skirts and blouses, though the thought of a suit when the Real feel is in triple digits is not pleasant.

You have to decide what your priorities are. You can dress to flatter your body type and not be wearing what "everyone" wears, or you can wear what everyone wears and look terrible. It's up to you.

I own exactly one dress--the gown I wore to my kid's weddings. I have skirts, blouses, and suits. Shabbos ones are a little fancier than weekday -- silkier fabrics, slightly embellished, that sort of thing. A small lace collar or a narrow ruffled cuff is hardly overly frou-frou, and very simple tops can be dressed up with Shabbosdik jewelry. Whereas weekdays I may wear a cotton tricot crew-neck T-shirt, on Shabbos I may wear a jewel-necked silk shell with a pearl necklace. Identical style, different fabric, makes all the difference.

amother

↑ Mimosa

Sat, Jun 22 2024, 4:22 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

100%.
I know full well Iv grown out my current size, where did I say I havent accepted it?

Finances are bad and I havent got anything new since sukkos.
Im so embaressed of what I wear because theyr so small and look ridiculous on me.
Its not me to wear tight clothing.
Im literally embaressed to go out ,and shabbos is the worst cos its way more prominent.

Im dying to get anything new.
Hopefully I will be able to go to some sales sometime.

↑ Aurora

Sun, Jun 23 2024, 2:26 pm

amother Indigo wrote:

1. Your body is not obscene
It just doesn't look the way it used to, and possibly more attractive than you like. You have an adult woman figure. Possible PTSD from yeshiva dress code?

Suggest brighter/patterned skirt, dark top, and a lighter cardigan/jacket/vest. Basically, have your breasts and tummy covered by darker matte fabric, and more interesting in other places. Pair with a large necklace or infinity scarf. Statement necklace or scarf will make your chest look proportional.

But get it in your correct size.

amother

DarkKhaki

Mon, Jun 24 2024, 4:28 am

I'm obese and I don't have large breasts. However, I'm around a 42F depending on the brand. Realizing that it's not a contradiction and getting bras that are my size has improved the way my clothes look on me a lot. There are women who have mentioned to me that they're a DD cup and I know for a fact that they are not. It would be incredibly inappropriate to say anything about it in real life, but it bothers me knowing how much discomfort women are going through because it's so hard to get fitted correctly.

It's much easier to get shells and wear a vest or a sleeveless dress than it is to get a sleeved garment to look good. Because most clothes only come in one shape and different sizes, and it's hard to find something to fit your body type. Sleeves just add another variable.

Try on knit dresses. Some of them are terrible, but some of them are magic. It needs to have just the right amount of drape, the right cut, the right thickness. When it works, it works.