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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
mumoo
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Wed, Jan 31 2007, 4:10 pm
Yes, we'll ask a shaila, I just wanted to hear opinions-
My dds really want their own rooms. There are three in one (admittedly large) room now. Dh and I decided to let one have the guest room, with the stipulation that if we ever really do need the room, she can give it up for a Shabbos or whatever. I finally realized it's not nice to hold it for possible guests when it's so important for the girls who live here all the time.
Either the 9 yr or 12 yr will get the room, the other will stay in the big room with the three yr. So my question is-is there a problem that my 16 yr ds sleeps in an adjoining room and frequently has Shabbos guests. The rooms are in the basement, with their own doors, but two floors away from the rest of the bedrooms. What do you think?
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Mommy3.5
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Wed, Jan 31 2007, 6:43 pm
when there are male guests for shabbat, your daughter should sleep upstairs with her sisters. There is no issue at all with her sharing a basement with her brother. I did just that for 5 years.
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chocolate moose
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Wed, Jan 31 2007, 6:52 pm
I don't think it's a halachic shayla either.
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shalhevet
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Thu, Feb 01 2007, 2:21 am
Can anyone come from upstairs at any time, without having a separate door to unlock? If you can it is not yichud.
Only if it is a self-contained apartment which can be locked off it will be a problem.
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brooklyn
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Thu, Feb 01 2007, 3:47 am
Are you asking if it is ok for dd and ds alone or when ds has guests?
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mumoo
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Thu, Feb 01 2007, 9:11 am
I am really concerned only when there are guests, not just the siblings. There is no yichud; I guess its more of a hashkafic issue- getting up to use the bathroom while wearing night clothes, etc
I asked my Rov. Before he was able to fully answer, he said it is probably a problem, but didn't elaborate just then. He was at a chassunah and needed to go and I'm waiting for him to call back
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amother
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Thu, Feb 01 2007, 10:24 am
I'm interested to hear this, as my kids 3 bedrooms share 2 bathrooms & we don't have a seperate "wing" for boys & girls.Actualy I don't know anyone who does regardles of the floor they are on.I would love to be able to add on a bdrm per child with a private bath!!
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mumoo
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Wed, Feb 07 2007, 6:33 pm
Well, much to my surprise, ds who has this great room with the door leading to an outside upper deck, willingly agreed to move his furniture to a basement bedroom, where another ds sleeps in his own room, leaving two bedrooms upstairs for dd's.
The least of the problem says Rov, was that sleepovers mean girls and boys (teens) would have been possibly walking around in nightclothes (inherently not tznius), when getting up to use the bathroom.
It's not a problem for siblings, per se, but guests.
Anyhow it's no longer a problem for us. Kol hakavod to my wonderful ds for being mevatter his treasured room to a sister!
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nehama
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Wed, Feb 07 2007, 9:35 pm
Wow, I'm impressed with your son!
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mumoo
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Wed, Feb 07 2007, 10:10 pm
yeah, me too-there's a whole history.....
b'H he's a good boy
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brooklyn
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Thu, Feb 08 2007, 6:09 am
You should have much nachas from all your kids.
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mumoo
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Thu, Feb 08 2007, 7:08 am
omeyn-and so should all my friends here on imamother
Last edited by mumoo on Thu, Feb 08 2007, 7:10 am; edited 1 time in total
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