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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Infants
718
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Wed, Jul 08 2009, 3:11 pm
"I dont want to spoil him"
I honestly dont think theres such a thing as spoiling a baby, if he cries you should take care of him. I would always take care of my baby and would wonder if Im spoiling him too- friends and family encouraged me that a baby can never get enough of their mothers love. He turned out pretty well behaved.
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Yulka
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Wed, Jul 08 2009, 11:46 pm
Just a comment on the baby wrap. If you don't want to spend lots of money on it you can just make your own. And it doesn't require any sewing. Just go to a fabric store and get a stretchy cotton 5yds by 30" and you have yourself a wrap.
Here is the link with more info on that.
http://www.make-baby-stuff.com......html
http://minsari.com/video.htm
There are many more videos on how to tie them on youtube.
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flowerpower
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Wed, Jul 08 2009, 11:56 pm
I had three babies that cried and cried and cried the first year(medical was ruled out by two of them). Some kids just like to cry and are more needy.
What about the jolly jumper-some kids love jumping in it.
What about music? the only way one was quiet was if she was in the stroller alone in a room and the music on blast so she gave up because she couldn't cry over the music(sounds abusive but it wasn't that loud)
Is the baby better at the sitter? Some kids are worse with the mother around. I remember going to my mother to pick up the baby and she was happy. As soon as she saw me she would start crying again.
Like the others said-the more mobile they are, the less they cry.
Does the baby sleep ok? Enough naps and good night sleep?
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spinkles
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 12:05 am
Agree with the jumperoo suggestion. My babies love it. They don't last long in the exersaucer, but the jumperoo keeps them happy for good stretches of time. The freestanding jumperoos are better than the doorframe ones.
Also I find that as the house gets busier with more kids, the babies aren't as fussy. There's more going on so they're not bored. So don't worry that it'll be like this with every baby you have.
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spinkles
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 12:07 am
forgot to add--infant massage can help
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qeenB
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 12:34 am
the cranial sacro therapist that I use is very very good especially with babies. I took my baby when he was about 5 months for something else and I was telling her how I noticed that over pesach when I was eating out by my family he would just cry and cry and seemed very sensitive to the noise. he also wouldnt settle down and take his naps properly. she told me something was causing a buzzing in his ears and he was having a sensory overload and after she worked on him he really settled down B"h . I dont know your babies whole birth history has he been crying like this scince he was born? but I feel seeing someone like this can be very beneficial. the cranial sacro therapist I use charges $100 for a session. I have used her myself for my siatica and she really helped me she was working out of a place in crown heights but stopped. now she is working out of her office in manhattan. if you might be interested let me know and I will look up her number.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 9:36 am
(Yulka, stretchy wraps are great for little babies, but they can start becoming cumbersome as the baby gets bigger...Her baby is 8 months old, and I don't know how big...)
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amother
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 10:48 am
Yup, been there. I went back to work full time. The baby became a needy teenager and young adult.
im sorry but maybe that worked for you however telling someone to leave thier baby who is obviously in pain or unhappy about something, to add to the fact to not have mommy around is not good for the baby at all!
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happymom
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 10:48 am
she must be in pain or something, what do the doctors say? or maybe there is some other expert who can try and see what is wrong. does she have stomach pains? is she not getting enough to eat? is she getting enouch sleep?
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amother
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 10:51 am
I remember going to my mother to pick up the baby and she was happy. As soon as she saw me she would start crying again.
thats many times because kids feel most comfortable around thier mother and dont usually like to be left. so either they cry by letting you know they arent happy with where they are, or to let you know they are tired hungry etc... or that they missed you and dont understand why you left them,!!! it doe NOT mean that they are happier without you. sometimes babysitters ignore crying babies so they learn its no use. then when the aprents come they let it all out.
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happymom
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 10:53 am
I do work (part-time) but I dont think that has anything to do with his crying!
I would just check up for a surpirse visit when your baby is with the babysitter or put a nanny cam to make sure it really for sure doesnt have to do with the babysitter. maybe something the babysitter is or isnt doing is making the baby unhappy. its best to be 100 percent sure that it doesnt have anything to do with it imo.
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gold21
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 11:55 am
You can buy all the swings and slings in the world. but if your baby is as fussy as you describe, I highly highly doubt that little cozy changes will help significantly. You have to figure out why your baby is so unhappy. see a gastroenterologist to check for reflux. Yes babies can very well have reflux even if they dont spit up. my son was suuuch an unhappy baby, always crying, and didnt spit up a lot at all, but he had really bad reflux. Speak to a comepetent pediatrician for advice as to what may be going on with your baby. I have no clue what youre like in real life, OP, but if you are an intelligent person, then I would hope you realize that swings and slings may soothe your babys pains, but if something is actually hurting him, you need a doctors care, not just attachment parenting techniques. good luck
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OldYoung
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 12:35 pm
You may also want to take the baby to a competent allergist to test for allergies, so that you know if there are any foods you should avoid if nursing.
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shoy18
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 1:43 pm
I had a fussy infant, and now have a fussy toddler.
We changed her formula 6 times and then discovered that she would actually sleep the night if we put her on her tummy, so at least she slept well. during the day she was and is still super fussy, she hates any new people or any changes, swings, carriers, strollers, cars, she hates them all. Im hoping the more she learns to talk the better she will become.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 1:47 pm
Shoy, can I suggest this book:
http://www.amazon.com/Raising-.....23288
I also have a son who finds transitions very hard...he was also a baby who cried a lot (he did have reflux), and I find prepping him for changes really helps. Even before a child can speak, their receptive abilities are usually higher and at least they can begin understanding when you give warnings...
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gold21
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 1:52 pm
I agree with oldyoung, you should also see an allergist. Something youre eating could be setting him off. Also, im assuming youve ruled out the obvious stuff such as recurrent ear infections.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 2:12 pm
(I didn't mean to spend money, although it's not that expensive -- though I do own it! I hope you find it helpful.)
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flowerpower
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Thu, Jul 09 2009, 11:30 pm
amother wrote: | I remember going to my mother to pick up the baby and she was happy. As soon as she saw me she would start crying again.
thats many times because kids feel most comfortable around thier mother and dont usually like to be left. so either they cry by letting you know they arent happy with where they are, or to let you know they are tired hungry etc... or that they missed you and dont understand why you left them,!!! it doe NOT mean that they are happier without you. sometimes babysitters ignore crying babies so they learn its no use. then when the aprents come they let it all out. |
Totaly disagree with you. There are kids that like to kvetch and whine with mama around. You can tell when a kid is in pain usually. When a kid asks the whole day to go to bobbys house then I doubt he is uncomfy when there.
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