Healthy lifestyle - can we talk about cheating?

amother

Mon, Jun 24 2024, 10:30 am

I've been on a healthy lifestyle journey for about a year now. I keep a very strict diet when I'm at home, and when I'm out I make the most health-compliant choices based on what's available.

This is working well for me, for the most part, and I don't want to backtrack and fall off the wagon.

From a health perspective I believe nothing terrible will happen if I treat myself occasionally, but I'm worried about a slippery slope. I haven't had any treats in 8 months or more.

I have the opportunity to have a fun evening out. Part of me wants to go to a fun restaurant, have maybe some meat pizza and a cocktail - because it's yummy. But I'm really worried about that slippery slope. I could choose a different restaurant, and/or order a grilled chicken salad and a seltzer, but that's definitely less "fun" for me.

I would guess it's problematic that I have such a fear of falling off the wagon. And it's also problematic that I associate unhealthy food with "fun".

Any advice?

amother

Almond

Mon, Jun 24 2024, 10:36 am

What's your definition of healthy eating?

Can you do a gluten free meat pizza and a cocktail that's just fruit juices and a bit of alcohol, no added sugar?

To me that would be a compromise between boring chicken salad and seltzer and all out "cheating". And it's not just the cheating that bothers me on a philosophical level, it's that it can undo months of hard work if your aim is gut health and such.

amother

Antiquewhite

Tue, Jun 25 2024, 1:35 am

I am very careful about what I eat on a daily basis.
I count calories daily etc.
however, I have a rule that when I am out, I order what I enjoy.
it's not slipping, it's part of my diet!
It actually helps me be more careful on the day to day basis, as I know that when there is intense pressure (everyone at a wedding digging into something or sitting at a restaurant really wanting to order the fettecini or rib steak, I will enjoy without worrying)
sometimes the next day I will cut back a little on calories (not too much, like maybe 100 calories)
I have seen people go out to eat, order seltzer and a salad or equivelent and then eat other people's dried up crusts that are cold because they didn't just order what they enjoyed.
I think the biggest impact on health isn't what you do on the occasional night out...it's what you eat day in and day out (or every Shabbos Smile

that has the biggest impact Smile

amother

Tue, Jun 25 2024, 1:45 am

amother Antiquewhite wrote:

that has the biggest impact Smile

Ok so this is actually very helpful. What keeps me on the wagon currently is that I'm very strict. I have rules for myself. And what I'm worried about is that if I treat myself and I can't fit it into some self-imposed "rule" it can spiral into eventually falling off the wagon. Like, first it's because I'm at a restaurant but then maybe it will be because I'm really wiped out and that shake stand at the mall is really calling me. And then it will be that I didn't have time to make lunch, so a bag of crackers is the best I can do. And before I know it, there are no more rules. Like so many others, I've been on lots of diets in my life. This time I really need to stick with it long-term. On the one hand, I think that part of sticking with it can be knowing when not to be so rigid. But on the other hand, I worry that being too flexible will ultimately lead to me giving up the whole thing. So I need some guidance as to whether I can occasionally be flexible, and, if so, how to decide when it's ok and when it's not.

amother

Tue, Jun 25 2024, 5:55 am

Iymnok wrote:

If I go out to a nice place with for our anniversary or a birthday, then we enjoy. We don't go overboard, but we get what we can't get at home and is worth going out for. Grilled chicken breast does not fit into that.

Is there a rule I can or should apply? I just don't want it to become a slippery slope. I agree the exception for a night out seems reasonable and healthy. But I'm worried that I will start making more and more exceptions little by little, until I drop the whole thing entirely. So I guess this is really a behavior science question. How do I allow myself the occasional treat, without it causing my whole healthy lifestyle to break down eventually?

amother

Anemone

Tue, Jun 25 2024, 6:00 am

Maybe give it strict guidelines, like "a planned meal out of the house together with only DH."

That way
Only if it is planned (I.e. not spur of the moment let's get sushi)
Only if it is a meal (not a snack)
Only if it is out of the house (no takeout instead of dinner)
Only if it is with only DH (and not with the whole family, or with friends, or alone)

amother

Tue, Jun 25 2024, 6:06 am

amother Anemone wrote:

Thank you, I think this should cover me. Feels ridiculous that I need to do this, but I do think this is the perfect rule. Maybe sometime in the future I can reassess, but I think this is what I need for right now.

Thank you!