How much savings do your parents have?

amother

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:07 am

My mother is in the aging process and her finances are all over the place. I am trying to help her make sense of it as she is also struggling with memory. I was hoping she would have at this point over a million dollars in savings but she only has a bit more than half of that.

She does not own a home. Social security is not enough to cover rent.

I am wondering how others in this position are. How can we do better for ourselves when we pay so much in tuition and life.

amother

Bluebonnet

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:10 am

When people are expected to support their adult children and give them money for a house, car, pay for their grandkids bris etc...it leaves very little opportunities to save.

amother

Crocus

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:20 am

Parents probably have less than $50,000 in savings but my father has a pension so their savings is really only to pass on to us kids.

I'm sure they are okay with that amount of savings knowing that they always paid full tuition and help support their children whenever they needed it. They do own their house which was only paid off recently. That is prob worth 1.5 mil.

amother

Amaranthus

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:20 am

amother Bluebonnet wrote:

When people are expected to support their adult children and give them money for a house, car, pay for their grandkids bris etc...it leaves very little opportunities to save.

And some people don’t do any of those and still have minimal savings. When you’re struggling to pay groceries and rent (like so many people these days) there’s not enough left over to fund your 401k.

Elfrida

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:27 am

I don't know, and as long as my father remains capable of handling his own finances, I have no reason to find out.

He owns the house, and has enough to live the way he wants. It's not my business to enquire any further.

oohlala

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:41 am

I dont know details but bh my parents have over two million in assets which includes their house, savings and investments. Had a small family which helped them be able to save and didn’t need to support kids for very long. Just from what they’ve hinted and also what I know about their house value.

amother

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:47 am

amother Bluebonnet wrote:

When people are expected to support their adult children and give them money for a house, car, pay for their grandkids bris etc...it leaves very little opportunities to save.

We don't follow this lifestyle and I still don't think we will ever have enough.

amother

Burgundy

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 10:54 am

amother OP wrote:

If she’s struggling with memory you might want to put her money in a trust. With 500k you can probably get a decent enough return - either in money market , t bills or some other safe investment vehicle, to supplement her social security. Speak to a financial advisor and lawyer. Do you have power of attorney?

Highstrung

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 11:05 am

Don’t know and I don’t think it’s my business really.
If the parent can no longer take care of themselves (example when my father had a couple of months to live) we had the discussion.
I know nothing about my mothers finances but it’s no where near half a million . My father had less than $50k . I’m not sure why you are worried about her having $500k. That seems to be pretty decent .

amother

Jade

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 11:27 am

So I don’t know my parents finances and I DH pays the bills. Can someone explain to me how much someone would REALLY need?
I imagine they would have Medicare and a secondary. I would have no problem with them living in my home with me and honestly food would fall into my budget.

Vacations are a luxury, and you don’t go on a cruise if you don’t have the money for it.

Their car would be whatever they currently have, they are not buying a new one.

A cell phone plan, the little clothes people still buy after a lifetime, the lunch out with friends… social security should cover that.

I know I am a little naive, but what am I really missing if I am happy to have my aging parents live with me?

amother

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 11:33 am

small bean wrote:

why would you want your mother to have a certain amount of money?

So she can age with dignity. If she moves into assistant living that's easily 8k a month. A carer could be thousands. Are people in such denial that aging is horribly expensive?

amother

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 11:36 am

amother Jade wrote:

I wish I was able to have my mother live with us. This is not a current option. There are food costs, rent, lack of income, but even more so when they are unable to care for themselves safely it could cost thousands for aids.

amother

Jade

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 11:36 am

amother OP wrote:

So she can age with dignity. If she moves into assistant living that's easily 8k a month. A carer could be thousands. Are people in such denial that aging is horribly expensive?

It is very expensive if you outsource all the care.

I imagine if you send a child to boarding school and outsource all their needs it would be very expensive as well.

amother

Oleander

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 12:18 pm

amother Jade wrote:

An aid - this is very expensive.
Medication
Dr copay

small bean

Thu, Jun 20 2024, 12:42 pm

amother OP wrote:

So she can age with dignity. If she moves into assistant living that's easily 8k a month. A carer could be thousands. Are people in such denial that aging is horribly expensive?

I hear. My grandparents did not have money and I watched my parents take care of both sets, financially and physically. I would love to be blessed to do that for my parents. My parents have what they have and the rest would be my pleasure to give them.