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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
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amother
Trillium
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 Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:34 pm
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And what are you having for breakfast tomorrow?
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amother
Ebony
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:35 pm
Guys. Op wanted validation. Not a handout.
It isn’t a mitzvah to give tzedaka to one who doesn’t want it.
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amother
Milk
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:37 pm
Hi op that is so frustrating I hope you get paid soon!!!
Just want to encourage you to reconsider in the future if, you should, G-d forbid, need assistance. A visit to a food pantry or getting wic or something is not something to be ashamed of
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:38 pm
so bh my kids I have the last 5 eggs and a few pieces of bread for breakfast
and then they have a full day in school which they get lunches and snacks bh
so I have to figure it out by 4pm tmro
I'm done with loans - taken out too many in the past years that we are paying off ....
If I have money I spend it and if I Dont I just dont!!!
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amother
Silver
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:38 pm
| amother Ebony wrote: | Guys. Op wanted validation. Not a handout.
It isn’t a mitzvah to give tzedaka to one who doesn’t want it. |
Thats incorrect. If someone is struggling and wont take help and its not good for them, its a mitzvah to save them from themselves.
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amother
Firethorn
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:39 pm
| amother OP wrote: | so bh my kids I have the last 5 eggs and a few pieces of bread for breakfast
and then they have a full day in school which they get lunches and snacks bh
so I have to figure it out by 4pm tmro
I'm done with loans - taken out too many in the past years that we are paying off ....
If I have money I spend it and if I Dont I just dont!!! |
isnt your husband hungry?
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amother
Ebony
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:40 pm
| amother Silver wrote: | | Thats incorrect. If someone is struggling and wont take help and its not good for them, its a mitzvah to save them from themselves. |
Really? It’s a mitzva to humiliate someone? As far as I know she’s not in danger.
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amother
Powderblue
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:41 pm
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What other dry ingredients do you have in your house that you can make something out of? Like if you have oats you can make oatmeal or overnight oats. Maybe we can help you with ideas for that.
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amother
Tiffanyblue
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:42 pm
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Op, I really hope you get paid soon. But even more so I hope you realize that feeding your kids comes before your pride. Hashem helps but we have to be willing to accept the help, even if it means taking from public pantries or letting others know you need help.
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amother
Powderblue
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:42 pm
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Also can you go shopping and ask the grocery store to put the balance on your account?
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amother
Cornsilk
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:43 pm
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Op I understand you. I am owed about 8,000 dollars. I have no money to buy gas but technically I do. Its very frustrating. Hashem should help us all
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amother
Silver
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:43 pm
| amother Ebony wrote: | | Really? It’s a mitzva to humiliate someone? As far as I know she’s not in danger. |
How is it humiliating to send someone an anonymous zelle? Like any of us would ever tell anyone even on the off chance we figure out who she is.
Clearly she isnt going to take the money but I worry that her family wont have food for shabbos.
Do you hear her talking about her last few eggs and bread slices?
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amother
Pink
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:49 pm
Some ideas I do when I’m in your spot.
1- borrow some milk from a neighbor and have cereal. Ttly normal to run out of milk and repay them when you make your shabbos order. (Hopefully you’ll find a way to…)
2-Do you have frozen challah in your freezer? Chicken soup or any shabbos food in your freezer? A box matzoh From pesach or chumetz ones? Sometimes those things you forget you have and can make you a little meal.
Pretzel/ crackers/ rice cakes with peanut butter or jam.
Do you have any cans at home? Tuna? Any vegetables? Warm it up with some salt and spices.
Hatzlacha!
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:53 pm
lol
my grocery list literally says peanut butter, pretzles....
somehow I ran out of all my pantry ingredients
after having sooo much stock from after pesach
yes I am borrowing milk
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 9:59 pm
also the ironic part is we bh own a house, drive a nice car, kids dressed well
people would never imagine or think
like I made a comment to my neighbor my house is empty , she took it like I was lazy to go to grocery to stock up house
thanks for all your tzeddakah I just feel like there are people that can use it more desperately then me ...
hopefully tmro a miracle will happen , can't wait to report on that !!
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amother
Ecru
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 10:01 pm
| amother OP wrote: | I'm trying to say I technically have the money in the air, as soon as some ppl pay me its ment to go to this weeks groceries ...
I'm not looking for tzeddakah , I'm just frustrated that ppl didn't pay me 
I am not comfortable sharing my address or zelle info
I don't know how to keep it anonymous
but I am amazed how quickly my fellow sisters want to help |
If you live in a place with kosher restaurants we can order food you can pickup.
(I’m in monsey - Chestnut Ridge and lots of places are open, also happy to put an envelope of cash in my mailbox if you wanted to come tonight, you can choose to pay forward if at some point you wanted to, if it’s easier to take that way.)
Otherwise, we can help stock your house a bit so tomorrow the house has snacks.
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mlc
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 10:01 pm
I know how it is to be owed money. It’s like technically you have earned the money and you should have it !
A few years ago on a day that I was expecting to be paid and was counting on the funds , my employer told me that she had some big business expenses (There was a lot of construction going on ) and that she would pay me on the next payday. The next payday she said the same thing. And the next payday she was nowhere to be found.
I had bills I needed to pay and basics to purchase. And I did not want to take anything from anyone and I didn’t. But it was a very difficult time to say the least.
(In the end end, while she did pay some , she did not pay in full and I had to quit)
Can you please PM me - or PM a mod to pm me - I am reliving trauma reading this post and it would mean the world to me to send you a target gift card or something, you can create a fake email address with a fake name for me to send it to. I know you are not looking for a handout. But consider it a hug and a token of admiration from someone who actually understands.
Gam zeh yaavor . I hope your clients pay you asap. Your attitude and the way you are handling it is SO admirable.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 10:15 pm
thank you all for your validation
I am logging out for tonight....
praying for some things to change by tmro
and if they don't I might reach out to some caring ladies over here....
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amother
Tulip
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 10:21 pm
You mentioned you’re a graphic designer. I’m always looking for new talent and have a project I’d love to collaborate on.
How can we go about getting that set up?
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giftedmom
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Wed, Jun 19 2024, 10:59 pm
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You didn’t actually think you’d post that you’re hungry and people wouldn’t offer food! We are Jews after all! Feeding people is what we do!
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