Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
What does "you look sooo good" mean?
Previous  1  2



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
  Raspberry  


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 5:18 pm
bp1234 wrote:
It rly is a back handed compliment - bec makes you feel like- usually I don’t look good???
The “complimentor” should rly be more specific. Bh I’m a very complimentary person in general and I’ll always say- I love your outfit, or your wig looks so good- or you look so thin! Smile


I don't see how being more specific makes it less backhanded.

If you want to assume backhandedness, then maybe, oh, you love my outfit today, does that mean you hate my other outfits? My wig looks so good, does that mean you hate my face? I look so thin? What, you think I'm missing curves?
Back to top

zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 5:27 pm
What's up with all these threads picking apart compliments and looking for hidden meanings, usually negative ones? Why can't you-all just take a compliment at face value, assume that the person was expressing genuine admiration of one sort or another, and leave it at that? Most people aren't fiendishly constructing compliments like Trojan horses, pretty on the outside and hiding an armed militia of cutting intentions on the inside.

Yeesh.
Back to top

  zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 5:29 pm
And you know what? if you have low self-esteem that causes you to analyze every compliment for hidden barbs--that's YOUR problem, not the other person's, and something for YOU to work on.
Back to top

amother
Lemonlime


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 5:31 pm
No one says that to me ever. You look great, very nice, pretty. But I wouldn't think twice about it.
Back to top

amother
Clematis


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 5:33 pm
I find it off putting.

I usually don’t go around complimenting people, besides my children or dh sincerely.

So I guess I don’t get it and rather everyone who thinks you suddenly look skinny or good keep it to themselves 😝
Back to top

  zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:42 pm
As I said in a parallel thread, wear a campaign button indicating your appreciation or resentment of compliments so that those around you can know at a glance whether they should feel free to release the admiring remarks bubbling up inside them, or brutally shove them back down their own gullet to cause massive heartburn.
Back to top

Busybee5  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:45 pm
I hate it when people say that to me.
Maybe I have issues, but why is everything about looks?! Drives me crazy.

Say that's such a nice dress etc. Your wig is so good. But 'you look so good' is cringe to me.
I also just say thanks and want to change the subject. Maybe they're looking for a compliment back Smile
Back to top

  zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:49 pm
And what about our dear sister the master chef, who is seething on another thread because her newlywed sil didn't compliment her on the spectacular meal she served? Sister, post a sign on your door "compliments expected!" and sil, shy though you may be and afraid of offending by saying the wrong thing (and who could blame you if you read some of these threads?) , your sil has just indicated that she, unlike some, DOES like and apparently expects compliments, so let your hair down (figuratively) and let 'em loose!
Back to top

amother
  Raspberry  


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:50 pm
Busybee5 wrote:
I hate it when people say that to me.
Maybe I have issues, but why is everything about looks?! Drives me crazy.

Say that's such a nice dress etc. Your wig is so good. But 'you look so good' is cringe to me.
I also just say thanks and want to change the subject. Maybe they're looking for a compliment back Smile


A dress and wig are also looks.

And, IMO, if a nice dress and a nice wig are doing their job right, people won't (necessarily) notice the details, they'll notice that you look good.
Back to top

  Busybee5  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:51 pm
zaq wrote:
And what about our dear sister the master chef, who is seething on another thread because her newlywed sil didn't compliment her on the spectacular meal she served? Sister, post a sign on your door "compliments expected!" and sil, shy though you may be and afraid of offending by saying the wrong thing (and who could blame you if you read some of these threads?) , your sil has just indicated that she, unlike some, DOES like and apparently expects compliments, so let your hair down (figuratively) and let 'em loose!


LOL
Back to top

  zaq  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:56 pm
Busybee5 wrote:


Maybe they're looking for a compliment back Smile


Well, yes, it's generally accepted (even expected) that you return a compliment. "Dahling, you look marvelous!" "Why thank you, so do you!" is a fairly meaningless but harmless social formula just like "How are you?" "Fine, thanks, and you?"

Quit with the in-depth analyses, ladies. You want to do analysis, take a chemistry lab course, quantitative or qualitative, your choice, and leave the social formulas alone.
Back to top

amother
  Raspberry


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:57 pm
I unironically think fishing for compliments a little bit should be socially acceptable. That way people know who's receptive to compliments, and then everyone's happy.
Back to top

  Busybee5  




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 6:57 pm
zaq wrote:
Well, yes, it's generally accepted (even expected) that you return a compliment. "Dahling, you look marvelous!" "Why thank you, so do you!" is a fairly meaningless but harmless social formula just like "How are you?" "Fine, thanks, and you?"

Quit with the in-depth analyses, ladies. You want to do analysis, take a chemistry lab course, quantitative or qualitative, your choice, and leave the social formulas alone.


You're cracking me up today.
How's that for a compliment Very Happy
Back to top

  zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 7:10 pm
Busy bee, I accept any and all compliments, but my limit is three to five from any one person per day. More than that and it gets boring. There's only so many different ways to say "thank you," after which one starts to repeat, which is also boring.

So, thank you, I love compliments and I love making people laugh, and if they laugh, that's the biggest compliment of all.
Back to top

amother
  OP  


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 7:49 pm
zaq wrote:
What's up with all these threads picking apart compliments and looking for hidden meanings, usually negative ones? Why can't you-all just take a compliment at face value, assume that the person was expressing genuine admiration of one sort or another, and leave it at that? Most people aren't fiendishly constructing compliments like Trojan horses, pretty on the outside and hiding an armed militia of cutting intentions on the inside.

Yeesh.


I'm not sure why you're taking it this way! I don't think of it as negative at all! I just wanted to know what sooo good connotes. In the secular world I've never encountered anyone saying that - usually compliments about looks are more descriptive (for lack of better word).

I happen to thrive on compliments (hence the low self-esteem Smile) Was just wondering why I get this with my friends more than usual complimentary words. And lots of posters gave good explanations.
Back to top

amother
Slateblue


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 7:51 pm
I think it means dang girl…your hot. Except that’s not so polite to say. So instead wow you looks soooo good Very Happy Very Happy
Back to top

amother
  OP


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 7:53 pm
amother Slateblue wrote:
I think it means dang girl…your hot. Except that’s not so polite to say. So instead wow you looks soooo good Very Happy Very Happy


Lol I think I'll go with this explanation!
Back to top

  Busybee5




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 8:02 pm
zaq wrote:
Busy bee, I accept any and all compliments, but my limit is three to five from any one person per day. More than that and it gets boring. There's only so many different ways to say "thank you," after which one starts to repeat, which is also boring.

So, thank you, I love compliments and I love making people laugh, and if they laugh, that's the biggest compliment of all.


Noted. I'm happy that you accepted mine as part of your meager 3-5 a day Wink
Back to top

amother
Opal


 

Post Mon, Dec 30 2024, 8:07 pm
If means you look good! Everything you’re wearing is coming together to make you look amazing.
Back to top

Cheiny




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 31 2024, 2:39 pm
zaq wrote:
What's up with all these threads picking apart compliments and looking for hidden meanings, usually negative ones? Why can't you-all just take a compliment at face value, assume that the person was expressing genuine admiration of one sort or another, and leave it at that? Most people aren't fiendishly constructing compliments like Trojan horses, pretty on the outside and hiding an armed militia of cutting intentions on the inside.

Yeesh.


I agree. I think this taking apart of compliments, and trying to figure out whether it’s about weight, sheitel, clothes, overall, or even (!) a come-on, is pretty strange and definitely overthinking things.
Back to top
Page 2 of 2 Previous  1  2 Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

Related Topics Replies Last Post
"The Scribe" by Boris Deutsch
by patzer
3 Today at 9:54 am View last post
[ Poll ] Is the D in DH for "Darling" or "Dear&quo 5 Yesterday at 10:10 pm View last post
"Followers only post"
by amother
3 Yesterday at 3:38 pm View last post
How much does a "normal" sheitel cost?
by amother
43 Wed, Dec 25 2024, 9:14 pm View last post
"But mommy it's normal!"
by amother
12 Wed, Dec 25 2024, 11:35 am View last post