$300k IS NOT ENOUGH!!

amother

↑ Puce

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:00 pm

amother OP wrote:

OK EVERYONE here is what I did NOT tell you:

BH we actually have NO financial worries. This is because we have been making $300kish for a very long time, long before our expenses were so high. Back when we had just 2 babies and were renting for $1500/month. Therefore we had many years where we were able to save $150k+ per year. For this reason, we would be able to pay off a huge chunk of our mortgage right now if we wanted to. It’s not worth it for us to do so, since we are making money off of our invested money. B’derech hateva, we will also be having significant increases in income next year and in the years to come.

For these reasons we BH BH have no problem paying for all of our needs and most of our wants.

HOWEVER

That does not negate the reason I posted this. If not for our mazel and hard work earning all this money when we were younger, our situation would be very different. We LITERALLY would not be making it on $300k.

And THAT is the reason I made this post, I want people to understand that point!! People who kvetch about families not paying full tuition, people who kvetch about people who have lifestyle creep and overspend- they don’t understand the reality. Maybe they’re on government programs and don’t realize the true cost of things, maybe they bought a house even 6 years ago and have no clue how much mortgages are now.

The point is, families in the tri state area with 5+ kids need to be making literally hundreds of thousands to cover expenses. And how can we reasonably expect all frum families to be in the top 1% of earners in the US???

I don’t know what the solution is but I worry every night for my siblings and friends and how they will ever make it.

two questions. if this is your true financial situation why do you not pay full tuition. and second why do you do maaser with a “loophole”? not judging. genuinely curious. and I didn’t read through rest of thread yet so I apologize if this was already questioned and answered.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:00 pm

amother Gold wrote:

I don't call living on savings, making it. Savings should be put aside for big ticket items such as weddings iyh and retirement.

I think you're right, OP, you're not making it (I work in the finance sector where everyone is focused on saving as much as they can so maybe I'm biased).

Well it’s not that we’re living off of savings, it’s that we have income from our savings. Also, this is the first year we actually used the income from our savings toward expenses. We don’t anticipate doing that this coming year.

Also, we can technically pay off some of our mortgage, which would lower our monthly payments and we would still have a nice amount of savings left.

amother

↑ Daphne ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:03 pm

Op I agreed with your first post but now that you updated us I find it funny that you posted.

BH dh and I are also blessed with certain financial gifts that allow us to live with breathing space (for example no mortgage on our home, it was gifted to us completely). I wouldn’t start a post like this and then update like that, it just seems in strange taste. There are plenty of people making 300k who are struggling, I don’t think they need people to create fictional scenarios to stand up for them. If anything maybe it harms more than helps their cause. I’m sure you didn’t mean any harm but it comes off as interesting and in poor taste in today’s economy.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:04 pm

amother Puce wrote:

I already explained that we do pay full tuition, $13k-$17k per child. I wrote $60k because I assume that that’s what someone making $300k who asked for a break at my kids school, would be lying per kid.

We don’t use a loophole to pay maaser but someone with a similar income and expenses to me does, which is why I wrote it (before my “reveal”). We pay about $30k maaser to tzedaka.

amother

DarkGray

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:06 pm

The problem here is that 300k is a lot of money. BUT it's not a lot of money to live in an 800k home and send 60k worth of kids to private school each year. If you were secular you'd perhaps live in a cheaper home and send to private school or live in a nicer home and send to public school. In the secular world an 800k home and private school are super luxuries reserved for the people making close to 1 million a year. I'm sorry but it's true! It's a big problem and I don't know the solution!

amother

↑ Gold ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:17 pm

amother Daphne wrote:

If I'm not mistaken, this was the point of OP's post. That it's really not enough if you have typical frum expenses.

amother

↑ Coral ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:17 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

Can you cut landscaping? If you're struggling financially that's the first thing O would cut. Buying your own mower costs less than paying someone else regularly.

Yep. My 78-year-old mother still mows her own lawn (and it is not a small property.) (She knows she is capable of doing it and feels no need to pay someone else.)

amother

↑ Daphne ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:18 pm

amother Gold wrote:

If I'm not mistaken, this was the point of OP's post. That it's really not enough if you have typical frum expenses.

True but by posing as someone making 300k and struggling and then suddenly saying she has lots of savings and investments and is not struggling, she is reinforcing the notion that many have that people making 300k are not in fact struggling though they may claim to be.

amother

↑ Coral ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:20 pm

amother OP wrote:

I never said I’m paying for landscaping. My list of barebones expenses did not include landscaping or anything in that category, and income still didn’t cover this basic expenses.

BUT

As you can see from my recent post my income actually does comfortably cover landscaping. HOWEVER, if not for prudent financial planning early on and Mazel, I would’ve be able to.

And you’re forgetting, most people making $300k a year don’t have a lot of extra time for things like mowing the lawn.

You got any teenagers? If so, they are perfectly capable of mowing lawns.

amother

Chartreuse

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:23 pm

amother Blueberry wrote:

Yup it's hard. Same answer as for everyone else--you need to either increase your income or lower your expenses.
offhand, 6k for card seems high. Also, why is your homeowners insurance separate from your mortgage.?
what amount is your maaser based off of?
12K in utilities? Why?
and why do you pay your own insurance?

So confused at these questions.
6k for a car including insurance and gas is not expensive at all. Insurance alone can cost 2-4k a year.
Homeowners insurance being separate is interesting but that could be how they structured their mortgage and if not her mortgage would just be more.
Maaser of 22k is based off the Net income of 225k last I checked that’s 10%.
Paying own insurance, who else should pay it?

amother

↑ Pewter ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

Yes, exactly! So many people are saying this but I’m so curious how they would actually accomplish it (without living in a poverty stricken lifestyle, since that isn’t the point we are trying to make).

I think it's bizarre to talk about how $300k isn't enough, but suggestions to cut back anywhere is living a poverty stricken lifestyle.

amother

Burgundy

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:47 pm

amother Cornsilk wrote:

We make less than half of what OP is making and have double the amount of kids. I don't find these threads offensive at all. It's actually encouraging to me, that it's not like we could avoid struggle by earning more money. Challenges in parnasa are had by pretty much everyone, so we can stop second guessing our hishtadlus. We are doing our best, and Hashem will decide how difficult finances will be.

I felt the same.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:48 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

I think it's bizarre to talk about how $300k isn't enough, but suggestions to cut back anywhere is living a poverty stricken lifestyle.

Please please reply with a basic budget showing me how I can afford typical frum life expenses. Why is no one replying with this budget breakdown despite claiming that it’s so obvious??

amother

↑ Holly ↓

Wed, Dec 18 2024, 8:48 pm

amother OP wrote:

What are you saying, that $300k actually is enough to cover the expenses for my family and I’m just bad at math? Or are you saying that all families making $300k are doing fine because they have savings to live off of? None of that is true. And for the record, livings off of savings is just one small step away from going into debt. It means you are not covering your expenses.

I'm saying I'm sick of people in the higher earning brackets coming here to start threads and moaning how they don't have enough money knowing full well that imamother is full of women that are doing way worse then you.
You complain that you don't have enough to cover vacation and the other stuff while some of us don't have enough to cover our medical expenses.

Even if I don't read the thread I keep seeing these titles of people bemoaning their financial lot on 300k or the like and it gets to me every time.

What is the purpose of these threads anyway? You need financial advice? Go to a financial adviser. Imamother isn't the place. I don't even post here about my financial situation because I don't see a purpose.
If it's just to vent then again, it's hurtful to those of us who earn barely anything in comparison.