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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
amother
OP
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 2:27 pm
I rent.
Recently I had to move to a more expensive rental. I looked into buying something, but I just don't have the money for a down to create an affordable mortgage.
Quite a few people have commented to me very strongly that I'm not being smart.
That I should just buy, even for a crushing mortgage (like $5000 which I CANT afford). That I should have bitachon that Hashem will help.
And worse case scenario, the community and tzedaka will help collect to prevent us from foreclosing.
Suffice it to say, this attitude shocked me. I've gotten community help sometimes. But for basics, chicken and matza kind of help.
Are people really buying rather than renting and their fall-back is community help? Am I the one being foolish for not considering this an option? Would you give to community foreclosure funds or would you research the terms?
To my mind, someone who bought expecting to be able to afford and then fell on hard times is deserving but not people who buy beyond their abilities and expect others to help.
I always felt so clearly, but so many people commented that I should have bought so I'm starting to wonder if maybe I'm the crazy one.
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amother
Snow
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:13 pm
If you can make the numbers work on paper, you should do it. If you can cut enough in your life to get by, do it.
But if the math really doesn’t work definitely don’t.
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amother
Seashell
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:15 pm
amother OP wrote: | I rent.
Recently I had to move to a more expensive rental. I looked into buying something, but I just don't have the money for a down to create an affordable mortgage.
Quite a few people have commented to me very strongly that I'm not being smart.
That I should just buy, even for a crushing mortgage (like $5000 which I CANT afford). That I should have bitachon that Hashem will help.
And worse case scenario, the community and tzedaka will help collect to prevent us from foreclosing.
Suffice it to say, this attitude shocked me. I've gotten community help sometimes. But for basics, chicken and matza kind of help.
Are people really buying rather than renting and their fall-back is community help? Am I the one being foolish for not considering this an option? Would you give to community foreclosure funds or would you research the terms?
To my mind, someone who bought expecting to be able to afford and then fell on hard times is deserving but not people who buy beyond their abilities and expect others to help.
I always felt so clearly, but so many people commented that I should have bought so I'm starting to wonder if maybe I'm the crazy one. |
I'm not so old or smart but this attitude makes no sense to me. It would be irresponsible to buy something you can't afford.
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Tiredmom3
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:16 pm
You are 100% right. It is not okay to rely on a community fund to prevent foreclosure.
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lamplighter
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:19 pm
If you can afford it, then go for it. If you can't then you aren't relying on the community in case of crisis, you are creating the crisis.
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amother
NeonGreen
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:27 pm
How many people actually get this foreclosure help? For how long?
I doubt it's as simple as ur friends are making it sound.
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mirror
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:30 pm
I highly doubt that the community fund would pay your mortgage every month. It's wishful thinking. Anyone who makes such a comment most likely has never been in that position.
There are rare cases of individuals who know someone who choose to help them. But a community fund? Not realistic.
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gingleale
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:32 pm
Nope. You definitely made the smart choice.
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amother
Darkblue
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:43 pm
I very much doubt there is a community fund that provides financial help for people who deliberately bought a home they couldn't afford in the expectation that somehow money would fall from the sky.
What might happen is that someone is experiencing terrible financial difficult through no fault of their own - I.e. death or sickness in the family and so they have gotten behind in their mortgage payments.
This would be no different than having rent paid in a crisis to help a family avoid eviction.
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amother
Lime
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:43 pm
People will get help from the community to prevent foreclosure for a month or 2 months. It's not going to pay your mortgage every month for the next 30 years. Not even kind of close. It's the same type of temporary Health you would get to prevent eviction from a rental.
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Molly Weasley
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 3:51 pm
amother Lime wrote: | People will get help from the community to prevent foreclosure for a month or 2 months. It's not going to pay your mortgage every month for the next 30 years. Not even kind of close. It's the same type of temporary Health you would get to prevent eviction from a rental. |
I was involved in a fundraiser for this exact cause. We put together about $12,000 to save them from losing their home. We also helped them find a lawyer to renegotiate with the bank. But under no circumstances was anyone expecting us to come up with their mortgage payment, month to month.
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amother
Fern
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 4:17 pm
A relative couldn’t afford the mortgage and the house went foreclosure. He had an extremely wealthy friend who bought the house and had my relative pay him back.
It’s not the norm and if my relative had not paid him back, he would have just resold the house.
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notshanarishona
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 5:02 pm
I once got help paying our mortgage from jfsa but I can’t imagine any community can afford long term help
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familyfirst
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 6:04 pm
Someone on this site once shared that a Rebbe advised them:
If you can make it work 80 percent then go for it. Don’t need to line it up 100 percent or you’re not leaving HaShem room for the extra Brochos.
If you can’t make this work realistically eighty percent, then it would be irresponsible to purchase.
This is how I understood it. I may be wrong. But it really resonated.
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amother
Chartreuse
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Sun, Oct 13 2024, 6:09 pm
I would be shocked if it's halachically allowed for someone to knowingly get into this situation. And I'm saddened that people are so cavalier about accepting tzedaka.
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