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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
amother
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 2:49 pm
amother Stonewash wrote: | Please don't do this. I grew up being told to do this and it was very embarassing for me as a kid. I am not sure how old she is but I still feel the feelings of shame of people asking me to move around the shul. |
It's very, very normal. I'm sorry you were embarrassed by this. There's nothing to be ashamed about.
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amother
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 2:53 pm
amother Bellflower wrote: | It's very, very normal. I'm sorry you were embarrassed by this. There's nothing to be ashamed about. |
I am sorry I disagree and now as an adult I believe possibly stealing.
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amother
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 2:56 pm
amother Stonewash wrote: | I am sorry I disagree and now as an adult I believe possibly stealing. |
I disagree. As I said, I used to work in a shul office. People reserve seats but, at least where I worked, the seats were still owned by the shul and people were allowed to sit there as long as they get up for the person who reseve the seat. You are paying to reserve it for when you are there, not for when you aren't there.
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amother
NeonPurple
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 2:58 pm
amother Slategray wrote: | And also make it more affordable. $200 in today’s economy is not ok. Have a shul membership paid over months don’t nickel and dime each family member rosh hashana time. |
Do shuls where you live not have membership fees?
We have memberships here and seats cost $. Our shul you get 2 seats “free” if you’re a member and then if you want more you pay for those. Not sure how it works with others but all of the established shuls have membership fees.
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amother
Babyblue
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 4:12 pm
amother Bellflower wrote: | It's very, very normal. I'm sorry you were embarrassed by this. There's nothing to be ashamed about. |
I’m sure there are different norms but it’s not normal in any shul I’ve been to.
One year I didn’t reserve a seat, not finance related. I ended up going and feeling so uncomfortable and distracted and yes embarrassed the whole time looking up to make sure the person whose seat I was in wasn’t coming in. I would never do that to a young girl.
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amother
DarkKhaki
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 4:14 pm
OP did you ask the rabbi or person in charge if you can have a seat for your daughter because she wants to daven and you can't afford it? Most are very accommodating . They charge because a shul needs funds but they usually are understanding if someone can't afford it.
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amother
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 4:26 pm
My neighborhood shuls charge only for RH and YK.
$100 most shuls and 770 depends on the seat but I think it starts at $300
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Refine
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 4:38 pm
Can you "split" a seat with a young mother who won't be coming for long?
Think of such a family and offer them 75$ for your daughter to use their seat when they are not there. They may even decline payment.
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amother
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Wed, Oct 02 2024, 4:46 pm
Refine wrote: | Can you "split" a seat with a young mother who won't be coming for long?
Think of such a family and offer them 75$ for your daughter to use their seat when they are not there. They may even decline payment. |
I sat in other people’s seats and when they came to shul I’d get up for them. B4 they even asked me to get up.
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amother
Stoneblue
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Yesterday at 10:29 pm
amother Bellflower wrote: | It's very, very normal. I'm sorry you were embarrassed by this. There's nothing to be ashamed about. |
It’s not fair to do to a girl. Besides, how can she concentrate if she’s worried about being in someone’s seat the whole time. I know I wouldn’t be able to focus on davening if I had to constantly check if I was in someone’s seat if they arrived. And then have to go from seat to seat. That would be embarrassing.
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amother
Marigold
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Yesterday at 10:33 pm
Go to Chabad
And make a donation afterward
Sorry this happened
Understand the need to charge as well as need for some complimentary underserved seating
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Molly Weasley
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Today at 10:23 am
The shul we attend has very expensive seats. I wish it was only $200
On the flip side, it's understood that someone will be in your seat while you're not there. You reserve your seat while you're there. There's nothing "yours" about it otherwise.
Our Shul actually has a rule that you cannot buy seats for children. You're welcome to bring a stool, etc.
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