Thoughts on eternity band

ittsamother ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 8:57 pm

amother Turquoise wrote:

I proudly wear a gorgeous $100 moissanite eternity band with a 3 carat moissanite engagement ring. They're real to me. One of my daughters is iyh about to get engaged and I'm trying to talk the chosson into getting moissanite. Lab grown diamonds are overpriced imo and who care what you wear anyway?! Bh we have money so idk what anyone thinks about my stones but I wouldn't lie if asked. There's nothing fake/fraudulent about not wearing mined diamonds or even diamonds at all as long as you're not trying to pass it off as something it's not.

Good for you!! I honestly don't see the point in spending thousands of dollars for something sparkly if you can get something equally sparkly and durable for way less.

And as lab diamonds are going to get more and more popular, regular diamonds will lose their value anyway because there will be less of a demand for it.

ETA: What's the best way to buy a moissanite bracelet or ring?

Last edited by ittsamother on Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:01 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Dodgerblue

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:00 pm

amother Currant wrote:

No it doesn’t, everyone can do what works for them. A 2K gift isn’t expensive for a first baby. They’re all getting lab grown.
As a kallah they get a nice diamond ring, and then they have to wait twenty years to get a nice ring for their other finger. I think first baby is a perfect opportunity and it’s such a classic piece, just like a diamond ring. Might as well have it and enjoy it for an extra twenty years.

Sorry 2k is a very expensive baby gift, and yes if you’re in kollel live a kollel lifestyle. My husband was working I got a $250 silver candlestick to match my candlestick for the new baby.
I’m sorry and then 3 years later they want a tuition reduction because they’re in kollel and they get food distributions before Yom Tov while the working poor middle class who pay for their food (no food stamps) pay for insurance (no Medicaid) have to pay full tuition.

amother

↑ Burntblack ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:01 pm

amother Turquoise wrote:

I'm not super familiar with moissanite but it's fairly new correct?

It's different than cz and looks nicer.

In my day the only option was mined or cz and there was no comparison

amother

↑ Burntblack ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:03 pm

amother Dodgerblue wrote:

U can quit your job, get benefits, and maybe afford a 2k ring.

No one usually does this though. Not sure why if it's such a great lifestyle

amother

↑ Currant ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:04 pm

amother Maize wrote:

Why do they need a 2k ring for having a baby? Why is the expectation any gift at all?

Why do they need a 4K diamond ring for getting engaged?
Why is there an expectation for any gift at all??
ETA: I’m saying this sarcastically.

amother

↑ Tuberose ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:06 pm

amother Smokey wrote:

37.

Then I’ll automatically assume it’s lab grown if I see you in it if it’s a Diamond piece of jewelry Smile

99% of people walking around in 3 carat Diamond studs and giant Diamond engement rings and eternity bands and tennis bracelets these days are wearing lab grown.

In my family they wear only real diamonds but age appropriate or occasion appropriate - ie not 100k in jewelry to the grocery store or at age 30.

amother

↑ Tuberose ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:07 pm

amother Currant wrote:

Why do they need a 4K diamond ring for getting engaged?
Why is there an expectation for any gift at all??

True!

Expectations lead to disappointment and lack of gratitude

amother

↑ Currant ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:14 pm

amother Dodgerblue wrote:

I think a new life is enough of a celebration to celebrate with a gift for the one who carried it for nine months, vomited over it, and brought it into this world.
2K is definitely appropriate, not just for first baby, for every baby.

I’m done having kids but for my daughters in law I spend 1-2 k for every baby (depending on what they choose, I give the $ to my sons so that it’s a gift from them to their wife) Yes, even though they’re in kollel.
Kollel means that they’re holding up the world with their learning, but their wives are still human who enjoy a nice piece of Jewlery just like I do, even if they chose a simpler lifestyle.

amother

↑ Carnation

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:40 pm

I’m newlywed and my engagement ring is huge and it’s not lab.
I’m sure everyone assumes it’s lab though lol.
Like I mentioned before, didn’t get an eternity band but when I do it’ll for sure be lab grown. No use in throwing away money

amother

Burgundy

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 9:46 pm

amother DarkOrange wrote:

A similar eternity band to what I have Molly's sells between 8.5k and 11.5. Lab grown I paid $1950. It's a masterpiece. The diamond itself are stunning.
A little before I bought this I finally allowed myself a diamond ring too. I never had one! I paid $1450 for a color E vvs2 2.5 carat. Now figure this ring in mined diamonds. I'll let you figure it out.

Would you please share where you bought the lab grown eternity band?

B'Syata D'Shmya ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 10:06 pm

amother OP wrote:

Hi all,

I’m a young kollel wife who works hard. I got a lab grown half eternity band after the birth of my first baby. 0.25 pointers 7 stones.

Sometimes I feel like a fraud.

What are your thoughts on a lab grown half eternity band? Is this real or am I a fraud?

What part of you feels like a fraud?
If you feel like a fraud and it doesnt "do it" for you, you should return it and get a real one when you can afford it.
It doesnt matter what other people think, its what you think that counts.
Mazal tov on the birth of your first baby, much nachas.

amother

Whitesmoke

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 10:41 pm

amother Currant wrote:

I am so happy that where I live in Israel no one around me has these expectations. Maybe someone does receive a very expensive piece of jewelry but it's not something she would show off or that others would know about. It's a yeshivish chareidi area but not super heavy like Kiryat Sefer just in case you're wondering.

In fact it would be kind of embarrassing to show how much money we spent at this stage of our lives, kollel or not (some are, some aren't) . I'm just as happy with a $100 gift.

We are probably all just as happy if not happier than those who have to receive all these expensive presents. If I had 10k spare I would put it towards my future house which I can't yet afford

amother

↑ Turquoise ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 10:56 pm

ittsamother wrote:

You can get some cheap on Amazon. But if you're looking for larger stones, the best way is to go directly to the moissanite dealer in the jewelry exchange building on 47th st in Manhattan.

amother

↑ Turquoise

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 11:06 pm

amother Burntblack wrote:

I'm not super familiar with moissanite but it's fairly new correct?

It's different than cz and looks nicer.

In my day the only option was mined or cz and there was no comparison

It's been around for decades but most ppl haven't known about it til the last few years. It's an actual stone unlike cz. It's also lab grown. The main difference is the color. When rated on the diamond scale, they can be from f-k depending on the quality. If you buy from a stone dealer they mostly only have f-g. The sparkle is also noticabley different. Moissanite has a kind of rainbow sparkle. I think it's prettier than diamond.

amother

Skyblue ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 11:41 pm

If I saw a brand new young kollel wife with an eternity band pushing a brand new baby in a stroller I would assume its a knockoff from Ali or CZ. Why would I assume a kollel couple can buy 10K worth or diamonds at the age of 21?

writinggirl ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 11:45 pm

I think this is just one more example of how luxury has become so attainable in the frum/yeshivish world. Just as Aliexpress normalized wearing Gucci loafers, Moncler coats and Stella McCartney bags, people are now only buying the biggest jewelry pieces they can get, with no regard for inherent quality. Furthermore, it really just shows a skew of priorities- just spend and spend to keep up with all these new “norms” rather than stop to think about saving money or leaving luxury purchases for the ultra-rich. Today “everyone” has to have it all. When I am in the supermarket and see women decked out in diamonds while paying with an EBT card, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

amother

↑ Skyblue ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 11:47 pm

writinggirl wrote:

You can laugh because as you see, non of it is real.
Although you are right and crying might be a good choice because that was 2K that could have gone on other baby essentials.

amother

Clover ↓

Sat, Sep 21 2024, 11:51 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks for taking the take to reply.

As far as 10 or 20th anniversary, I don’t know. But I had a very difficult pregnancy and this is what got me through.

My question is is a half lab grown eternity band a fake out.

What got you through is the jewelry you would get after? Surprised

Not the baby?