Are you popular in your bungalow colony?

amother

Seashell

Wed, Aug 21 2024, 11:07 am

I don't relate to this question. We are not in middle school anymore, or even High school.
No one in my colony is "popular". We are all friendly and get along well. BH I am spending my summers with mature women. It seems we are in the minority. Sorry to hear what some of you go through. Come join us!

amother

↑ Sienna

Wed, Aug 21 2024, 4:07 pm

amother OP wrote:

This is really important to hear. I really try to post everything happening on our colony group. Is that enough?

Or do some individuals need more?

I used to think anyone staying indoor for too long must be sad (since I’m so social) and try to get them out. But then realized some people prefer the colony experience differently.

have you ever heard of introverts?

amother

Blue

Wed, Aug 21 2024, 5:22 pm

amother Seashell wrote:

What colony?

amother

Bisque ↓

Fri, Aug 23 2024, 7:06 pm

amother OP wrote:

That's a good step, is everyone on?
Reading this week's chapter 😉
Does anyone know where the thread is about it?

Tao ↓

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 9:21 am

I couldn't believe Bungalow 21 this week. Are people IRL actually this awful? fully grown adults bullying the new kid like insecure tenth graders, really?!

amother

↑ DarkViolet ↓

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 9:24 am

Tao wrote:

I couldn't believe Bungalow 21 this week. Are people IRL actually this awful? fully grown adults bullying the new kid like insecure tenth graders, really?!

Yeah until this week's installment I thought the woman were a bit clueless, but now that they purposely missed her off the main chat it's a whole 'nother story...

amother

↑ Bisque ↓

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 9:25 am

Tao wrote:

I couldn't believe Bungalow 21 this week. Are people IRL actually this awful? fully grown adults bullying the new kid like insecure tenth graders, really?!

They excluded her, weren't actively bullying
Not that they're nice - as she had a hard time explaining to her husband
Where Is the thread on this story?

amother

↑ DarkViolet

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 9:28 am

amother Bisque wrote:

They excluded her, weren't actively bullying
Where I'm the thread on this story?

Ignoring is very much bullying. Subtle, but bullying nevertheless. Gas-lighting, making her second guess gerself.

amother

↑ IndianRed

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 9:28 am

amother Bisque wrote:

They excluded her, weren't actively bullying
Not that they're nice - as she had a hard time explaining to her husband
Where Is the thread on this story?

AFAIK there isn’t one, but someone -feel free to create one for all of us!

amother

↑ Bisque ↓

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 9:32 am

amother DarkViolet wrote:

Ignoring is very much bullying. Subtle, but bullying nevertheless. Gas-lighting, making her second guess gerself.

It seems they're happy with the friends they have and aren't looking past that to care for someone new
They're polite though ...
I've been in these type of situations actually and it's rare for someone to look past themselves to welcome the newcomer. I can relate to her.. Husband also said I didn't try enough when I complained Sad

↑ Tao

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 5:02 pm

amother Bisque wrote:

They excluded her, weren't actively bullying
Not that they're nice - as she had a hard time explaining to her husband
Where Is the thread on this story?

It's absolutely bullying. That is EXACTLY how girls bully. Tzvi (the husband in the story) doesn't it, because guys don't bully that way.

amother

Snapdragon

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 5:22 pm

Opening a different chat group and keeping her off the regular one while pretending they let her join, is absolutely bullying. And her husband is nasty for not listening to her side

giftedmom

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 5:30 pm

amother Bisque wrote:

There are those personality types that know how to push past that and insert themselves until people get comfortable with them. But not everyone can do that.

amother

Cyclamen

Sun, Aug 25 2024, 7:15 pm

I'm not reading the story and I'm not in a bungalow, but I was treated that way when I moved to my neighborhood. Grown up adults let me know very clearly that I wasn't welcome in their friendship. It still bothers me but part of me just feels bad for them that they were so insecure.

amother

↑ Bisque

Mon, Aug 26 2024, 1:40 am

amother Snapdragon wrote:

Opening a different chat group and keeping her off the regular one while pretending they let her join, is absolutely bullying. And her husband is nasty for not listening to her side

Do you think it was a joint decision ?
The 1 who made the chat is mean but did she ask the others?

familyfirst

Mon, Aug 26 2024, 2:25 am

This thread makes me so sad. Why would people deliberately hurt someone to lift themselves up?
To the poster who was left out of a hiking trip- that hurts. Can’t even recommend asking to be included next time. My self respect wouldn’t let me. But maybe you could do that.

All you really need is one friend. Look for the kind face, the one open to friendships. Continue to join “the circle” but have no expectations. Just be the decent one around there.

So hard. And so disappointing

amother

Nasturtium

Mon, Aug 26 2024, 5:48 am

We just came back from a family summer trip. Hiking, waterfalls, attractions, enjoying each others company as a family while staying in airbnbs and meeting other friendly Jews doing the same. No high school type cliques, no pecking order. Just comfortable relaxed living as a family.

This thread reminds me of when China used to execute dissidents by firing squad and then send the bill for the bullets to the family of the condemned.

Why in the world people pay to be tortured like this. If you thrive in a bungalow colony circle by all means be my guest. But if not, why do this to yourself? So sad.