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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
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 Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:48 pm
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I can’t handle more than 2 kids. I’m overwhelmed and have a short fuse. It’s ridiculous how I even have more kids than I can handle. The whole heter to not have kids thing is so stupid. There should be a heter to see if a woman can have kids. It’s ridiculous
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amother
Crocus
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:52 pm
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Definitely relate to you OP! Parenting is a bracha and at the same time is exhausting emotionally and physically.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:53 pm
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I’m only having as many I know I can handle. If I continue having more, I would be an entirely unpresent and unavailable mother.
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imaima
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:53 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | I can’t handle more than 2 kids. I’m overwhelmed and have a short fuse. It’s ridiculous how I even have more kids than I can handle. The whole heter to not have kids thing is so stupid. There should be a heter to see if a woman can have kids. It’s ridiculous |
There is such a heter too.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:57 pm
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Not being able to handle kids is a reason a heter is given. Were you told you must keep having kids despite saying you can't?
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 1:58 pm
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There is also a time and place to say to yourself I need to keep myself and my kids alive and I will do what I need to do even if your rabbi for some reason said no. He's still flesh and blood and can make mistakes. Putting kids in danger is obviously not in line with the torah.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 2:03 pm
| amother Strawberry wrote: | | Not being able to handle kids is a reason a heter is given. Were you told you must keep having kids despite saying you can't? |
My point is there’s guilt associated with a heter. I don’t ask anymore because I know my body. Why does a rabbi need to tell me I can wait a certain amount of time
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 2:05 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | My point is there’s guilt associated with a heter. I don’t ask anymore because I know my body. Why does a rabbi need to tell me I can wait a certain amount of time |
Why is there guilt? That's something you need to work on. No one needs to tell you need to wait a certain time, asking should be about understanding the halachos that pertain to your situation.
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amother
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Tue, Aug 20 2024, 2:14 pm
| amother Strawberry wrote: | | Why is there guilt? That's something you need to work on. No one needs to tell you need to wait a certain time, asking should be about understanding the halachos that pertain to your situation. |
Why aren’t the halachos black and white. One girl one boy
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