PSA: a choleh does not fast tisha b'av

amother

OP ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:06 am

I saw a couple of posts saying they are sick and how will they manage to fast. The halacha is that a choleh she'ein bo sakana (sick person who's NOT in life danger) has no obligation to fast on tisha b'av. (As opposed to yom kippur where only a sick person in danger of life can break.) If you are sick or feel very unwell for some reason (dehydration) ask a shailah if you should break your fast right away! It is not a mitzvah to fast if you are sick. There is no reason to feel guilty if a rav tells you to break your fast. Just like you are not obligated in tefillin, and shouldn't feel guilty that you don't wrap tefillin every day, it is exactly the same here, you do NOT need to fast if you are sick!!!

Eta: obviously as I wrote numerous times, ask a rav before eating or drinking. But do ask a rav if you're sick or very dehydrated!

amother

Hydrangea

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:07 am

amother OP wrote:

Thank you for this. I needed to hear it now.

ShishKabob ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:09 am

This really should be discussed with a real live Rav, not by a random posting on the internet. Of course if you get a psak from a Rav, feeling guilty is only a sign that the yetzer horo is playing around with you and succeeding.

theoneandonly

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:11 am

PSA ask a rav before breaking your fast on Tisha bav and don't just listen to random posts on Imamother.
But yes of course if the rav tells you to break it don't feel guilty about it.

amother

↑ OP

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:14 am

ShishKabob wrote:

This really should be discussed with a real live Rav, not by a random posting on the internet.

Of course!!! I wrote in the op to ask a shailah, I thought that was very clear. From the posts it seemed like people were not even trying to ask shailos because they assumed tisha b'av was too strict. Because it is more strict than others regarding pregnant and nursing women having to fast, which I think lead people to believe even sick people in no danger are obligated, which is incorrect. Additionally, it seems some feel guilty at having to eat, which I'm trying to explain is not necessary. Even a bad headache might count as sick enough to not need to fast, but of course ask a rav!

amother

Coral

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:25 am

theoneandonly wrote:

PSA ask a rav before breaking your fast on Tisha bav and don't just listen to random posts on Imamother.
But yes of course if the rav tells you to break it don't feel guilty about it.

Do you see a random person telling others to break their fast? Cuz all I see is a nice considerate person reminding others to take care of themselves.
For the record, I'm only fasting till chatzos. I have a terrible cold and my baby is getting over a bad ear infection, was up most of the night crying. I'm not feeling guilty about it at all, that's what Rabbanim and sheilos are for.

↑ ShishKabob

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:29 am

amother OP wrote:

amother

Fern ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 12:25 pm

I’m too scared to ask a shaila since BH I’m feeling okay so far (weak, tired, cranky, hungry, pregnant and nursing, but not nauseated or headache or vomiting). If the Rav says “no you have to fast if you’re not sick” but I start feeling horrible I don’t want to be stuck with a psak that I can’t follow. And I hate bothering rabbanim.

amother

Papayawhip ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 12:29 pm

amother Fern wrote:

So ask that. If he says you have to fast because you aren't sick, ask which symptoms, if they develop, would mean you should break your fast.

BrachaVHatzlocha

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 12:30 pm

yes, a very important PSA! thank you! one year I was nursing a baby who kept nursing and nursing and I felt so ill..... I wish I had known that Tisha Bav wasn't as strict as YK... Had I asked a shaila, I possibly didn't have to go through that

amother

Lotus

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 1:36 pm

amother Fern wrote:

If you are pregnant & nursing, you should most likely not be fasting at all & it's a mitzvah for you to not fast. You have the obligation to ask a Rav.

amother

↑ Fern ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 2:31 pm

amother Lotus wrote:

If you are pregnant & nursing, you should most likely not be fasting at all & it's a mitzvah for you to not fast. You have the obligation to ask a Rav.

I messaged the Rav like an hour ago and it shows he read the message but he didn’t respond. I am scared to eat b/c if I only “think” I need to b/c I hate fasting? OTOH I just had a cramp so I’m getting nervous.

amother

Blueberry ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 2:39 pm

amother Fern wrote:

A rav that can’t bother answering imo isn’t reliable

Having a cramp means your body talking to you.

I don’t think it’s a good idea to hold out

amother

↑ Papayawhip ↓

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 2:49 pm

amother Blueberry wrote:

A rav that can’t bother answering imo isn’t reliable

Having a cramp means your body talking to you.

I don’t think it’s a good idea to hold out

The Rav is probably getting hundreds of such messages today and he himself is also fasting. It's likely not that he "can't be bothered"
Rabbonim are people too

amother

↑ Blueberry

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 5:10 pm

amother Papayawhip wrote:

The Rav is probably getting hundreds of such messages today and he himself is also fasting. It's likely not that he "can't be bothered"
Rabbonim are people too

I can agree with you on that part.

However if he READ it, he could’ve written something such as I’ll get back to you soon or similar.

In my experience with rabbanim they only look at messages when they are available, and if they SEE a message there’s usually some sort of acknowledgment

amother

↑ Papayawhip

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 6:11 pm

amother Blueberry wrote:

Maybe he opened it by accident, or got a phone call as he opened it.

amother

NeonBlue

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 7:08 pm

Is nauseous considered ill?

I don't think I'm dehydrated because surprisingly my mouth is still very moist. I'm usually dry on a fast day. But I feel really nauseous.

I do nurse but my baby is already 1 and eats real food too so I don't think I count as nursing just because he's a little spoiled.

It's possible a couple of Tums could help the nausea but they're flavored so taking them would be breaking the fast, no?

My head is killing too but that's normal enough for fasting.

amother

Apricot

Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:35 pm

amother Fern wrote:

Your OB hasn’t recommended that you stop nursing once you knew you were pregnant?