|
|
|
|
|
Forum
-> Parenting our children
ora_43
|
Mon, Jul 22 2024, 3:55 am
amother Lightgreen wrote: | I've seen many people here say that hishtadlus doesn't impact or change the outcome.
A person will get what they are meant to get. |
That's a wild oversimplification.
The concept of hishtadlut is complicated. Effort doesn't guarantee result. A lack of effort doesn't always guarantee a lack of result. But in general, the Torah approach is that unless you're on a very very high level, you need effort (hishtadlut) to get somewhere. For someone like you or me who isn't on the level of, say, Rashbi - that is, mamash the highest of the highest - doing nothing and expecting everything to work out is asking for an open miracle.
(just talking about the concept in general here, not whether the use of this app or another is considered basic hishtadlut re: child safety.)
| |
|
Back to top |
0
3
|
amother
|
Mon, Jul 22 2024, 4:01 am
amother Taupe wrote: | Attach an extra car key to the baby, car can't lock if key is in the car. |
Not everyone locks their cars when they leave them. My husband never does. He has literally left his keys in the car sometimes when getting out of the car.
| |
|
Back to top |
2
0
|
shabbatiscoming
|
Mon, Jul 22 2024, 4:08 am
nu wrote: | On waze go to settings and go to notifications-reminders -child reminder. After you reach your destination it will remind you to check for kids | But who uses waze on every single car trip? I mean, I use it for places Ive never been to. If Im going to the supermarket or to swim chug, I dont use it.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
4
|
amother
|
Mon, Jul 22 2024, 7:39 am
It's been said before, but for many years I've been putting my purse in the back, either in carseat if baby isn't with me or on the floor near carseat. It really does work once you get in the habit of doing that.
Fwiw - I did forget my six month old in the car many years ago. I was very frazzled by another child's medical issue. Running from Dr to Dr etc. BH BH Hash-em totally looked after my baby (and my family) and at the same time taught me a valuable lesson, BH without tragic results.
| |
|
Back to top |
2
2
|
thegiver
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 2:17 am
Always remove your left shoe and leave in back with baby WHENEVER there is even. Small change in routine!!!!!! Both parents!!
| |
|
Back to top |
0
2
|
amother
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 3:12 am
thegiver wrote: | Always remove your left shoe and leave in back with baby WHENEVER there is even. Small change in routine!!!!!! Both parents!! |
This may work for those who drive automatic, but if you are driving a stick shift, you have to use both feet and not really a good idea to drive without a shoe on.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
1
|
amother
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 3:19 am
amother Wallflower wrote: | This may work for those who drive automatic, but if you are driving a stick shift, you have to use both feet and not really a good idea to drive without a shoe on. |
I was one of those advocating on one of these threads for taking the left shoe off. I didn't know anyone really drove stick shift anymore!! Or at least anyone of childbearing ages. Wow. What talent.
For you, I would put my purse, phone and/or work bag back there. Whatever you never leave the car without.
Personally I drive automatic so I know I never leave the car without a shoe. It's the only thing I wouldn't forget if I was that sleep deprived!
| |
|
Back to top |
0
3
|
amother
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 3:40 am
amother Aconite wrote: | I was one of those advocating on one of these threads for taking the left shoe off. I didn't know anyone really drove stick shift anymore!! Or at least anyone of childbearing ages. Wow. What talent.
For you, I would put my purse, phone and/or work bag back there. Whatever you never leave the car without.
Personally I drive automatic so I know I never leave the car without a shoe. It's the only thing I wouldn't forget if I was that sleep deprived! | Huh? What does child bearing years have to do with anything? Of course people drive stick shift cars. Not really in america, but in europe, aisa, israel. So many drivers like that.
And its not for me personally anyway. I have no small children at home anymore.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
2
|
amother
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 9:48 am
cookier wrote: | What kind of car seat do you have? Any plans to get a new one soon? Does he have a smartphone? |
Car seat is a Graco SlimFit and it's pretty new, only two years old so no plans of replacing it soon. DH does not have a smartphone.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 9:55 am
amother Wallflower wrote: | Huh? What does child bearing years have to do with anything? Of course people drive stick shift cars. Not really in america, but in europe, aisa, israel. So many drivers like that.
And its not for me personally anyway. I have no small children at home anymore. |
Sorry. Didn't know people drove stick in Europe. In America no one drives stick unless they are older or are a super car afficionado. You can't easily buy a stick shift here. And I don't live in NYC or NJ. It's just not a thing here.
I apologize. I usually am not USA-centric but I didn't realize the manufacturers made completely different cars (besides for the whole left/right side of the road thing).
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
Lightgray
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 10:08 am
amother Camellia wrote: | This looks like a lot of steps but it's not as complicated as it might look
1) Using your iPhone, click on this link to add the shortcut I made:
https://www.icloud.com/shortcu.....f09a6
2) Press the button to "Add Shortcut."
2) You will now be in the Shortcuts app. In the bottom bar, choose "Automations" (on my phone it's the middle icon)
3) On the top of the new screen that opens, press the "+" button.
4) You'll now be at a screen called "Personal Automation." Scroll down and choose "CarPlay." (You want this shortcut to run when something happens to CarPlay)
5) Choose "Disconnects" (I.e. run this automation when the phone disconnects from CarPlay)
and "Run immediately" (you don't want to have to click on an alert for this to run)
And choose "Next" (top right)
6) Now search for the shortcut you just added and select it.
All done! Now you can go back to your home screen. Any time CarPlay disconnects, the shortcut will run and ask you if you checked for your kids.
If you want to edit the list of questions, go back to the Shortcuts app, make sure you're on the "Shortcuts" tab (left hand tab), search for the Car Safety shortcut, press the three dots in the top right, and add or delete any items from the list.
|
This is great! Thank you.
I have the cleverelly and always respond to it. That keeps me from tuning it out.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 11:15 pm
I tried the automation today - and it's amazing!!!
thank you so much!
(camellia - do you have any other shortcuts or automations to recommend?)
Question:
what do I tell my 5 year old? She thought it was hilarious when the voice spoke up and said are there any cute kids in the car?
I don't want to scare her.
I also started putting my purse in the back seat and she wants to know why.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
Foxglove
|
Tue, Jul 23 2024, 11:50 pm
NO ONE forgets their baby in the car.
they forget that the baby is in the car.
two very different things.
it happened to me.
BH, my baby is alive. I didn’t realize she was in the car.
I didn’t forget her there.
I thought my husband brought her in, he thought I brought her in.
It took time until we realized she wasn’t in the house.
after that, we put in all kinds of protectors and systems. we had buddies and all kinds of things.
but once, when I had a newborn, someone picked up my kids for me for a week and dropped them off. one day, the person who usually picked up my toddler for me couldn’t bring my son all the way to my house. so he put the toddler in my friend’s car with my other kids. My friend dropped off my kids and forgot that my son was in her car…
an hour later, my husband came home and asked about the toddler.
BH, he was still alive. drenched from sweat but alive and healthy.
my friend did not even realize the severity of what happened. even today many years later.
we are not irresponsible people. We have systems. we have safety measures.
but accidents happen. I hope you are never tested. never ever.
but don’t think for a moment that it couldn’t happen to you. it absolutely could.
these parents left their baby in the car. I don’t know who they are. I don’t even know their name. but I know they didn’t leave their baby in the car.
it’s not like buying groceries and leaving them in the car until you are ready to bring them in.
they didn’t leave their baby in the car.
it was a change in routine and they didn’t realize the baby was in the car.
| |
|
Back to top |
1
8
|
amother
DarkYellow
|
Wed, Jul 24 2024, 12:06 am
amother Camellia wrote: | This looks like a lot of steps but it's not as complicated as it might look
1) Using your iPhone, click on this link to add the shortcut I made:
https://www.icloud.com/shortcu.....f09a6
2) Press the button to "Add Shortcut."
2) You will now be in the Shortcuts app. In the bottom bar, choose "Automations" (on my phone it's the middle icon)
3) On the top of the new screen that opens, press the "+" button.
4) You'll now be at a screen called "Personal Automation." Scroll down and choose "CarPlay." (You want this shortcut to run when something happens to CarPlay)
5) Choose "Disconnects" (I.e. run this automation when the phone disconnects from CarPlay)
and "Run immediately" (you don't want to have to click on an alert for this to run)
And choose "Next" (top right)
6) Now search for the shortcut you just added and select it.
All done! Now you can go back to your home screen. Any time CarPlay disconnects, the shortcut will run and ask you if you checked for your kids.
If you want to edit the list of questions, go back to the Shortcuts app, make sure you're on the "Shortcuts" tab (left hand tab), search for the Car Safety shortcut, press the three dots in the top right, and add or delete any items from the list.
|
This is amazing! Thank you! I don’t have car play, is there anything else I could connect it to? Like when I arrive at a specific location maybe?
| |
|
Back to top |
0
1
|
amother
|
Wed, Jul 24 2024, 12:11 am
amother DarkYellow wrote: | This is amazing! Thank you! I don’t have car play, is there anything else I could connect it to? Like when I arrive at a specific location maybe? |
Yes, you could set it to run when you arrive at home or at work. Those are probably the most common locations for brain lapses to occur.
Just choose "Arrive" instead of "CarPlay" from the menu in step 4. Choose the location you want (if you want more than one location, you'll have to set it up twice) and make sure you choose "Run Immediately."
Just be aware that it doesn't know if were driving or not so it will also announce it when you get home from taking a walk.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
1
|
amother
|
Wed, Jul 24 2024, 6:52 am
Anything like that with an Android?
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
GoldenOra
|
Wed, Jul 24 2024, 8:12 am
amother Camellia wrote: | Yes, you could set it to run when you arrive at home or at work. Those are probably the most common locations for brain lapses to occur.
Just choose "Arrive" instead of "CarPlay" from the menu in step 4. Choose the location you want (if you want more than one location, you'll have to set it up twice) and make sure you choose "Run Immediately."
Just be aware that it doesn't know if were driving or not so it will also announce it when you get home from taking a walk. |
Amazing!! Thank you so much!!
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
↑
cookier
|
Wed, Jul 24 2024, 2:55 pm
amother Ultramarine wrote: | Car seat is a Graco SlimFit and it's pretty new, only two years old so no plans of replacing it soon. DH does not have a smartphone. |
The steelmate or ride N remind would be the best in this case.
Personally I think the ride n remind is the better of the two options, because there’s nothing in the car seat itself, which is generally a safety no-no, and because it will set off the car alarm after a certain time if the weight isn’t removed from the seat after the car turns off. It has a button that you mount inside the door to the alarm off, so if you’re unloading things it won’t go off. The downside is that it’s expensive and has to be professionally installed. If your husband puts things on his back seat other than the baby, it also wouldn’t be the best option.
The steelmate uses a puck under the seat pad of the car seat to detect baby’s weight, and a sensor on the driver seatbelt that detects unbuckling, and alarms to remind the driver there is a baby in the seat. I believe the only way to turn the alarm off is to unplug the device or remove the kid, so he shouldn’t be able to fall into the habit of silencing the alarm. It should also work well, but in an ideal world you shouldn’t add anything to the car seat, so you’ll have to assess that risk.
Steelmate link: https://a.co/d/5DkNYJ4
Ride n remind link: https://a.co/d/bSiZ5WI
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
B'Syata D'Shmya
|
Thu, Jul 25 2024, 2:42 pm
amother Slateblue wrote: | Is there anything else? I had the clever elly for a few years but it kind of receded into background noise after a while.
The only real idea I have is to put my pocketbook in the back seat every single trip. Make it a habit. And then you will remember very quickly if you forgot your pocketbook in the car.
But I would love to know about something where there is a blaring alarm from the phone or car if a child is left inside ch"v. |
I agree, you eventually dont hear it, especially with all the noises in our lives...
A friend likes the left shoe tip, and find it effective. Another friend always calls her mother when she gets into the car with the baby and tells her how long to her destination. Her mother calls her back to double check that the baby was not left in the car.
Another puts the car key and cell phone with the baby. Sad that the chance of forgetting our baby is greater than forgetting our phone. But....
Another posted a bright red and yellow "baby in car" note on the drivers car door so she sees it when she closes the door...
There are lots of tips, whatever it takes, do it so we dont lose another child to negligence. Dont depend on ourselves. Every situation where this happened was an accident...by good and caring parents.
| |
|
Back to top |
0
1
|
amother
Tangerine
|
Thu, Jul 25 2024, 7:31 pm
amother Camellia wrote: | This looks like a lot of steps but it's not as complicated as it might look
1) Using your iPhone, click on this link to add the shortcut I made:
https://www.icloud.com/shortcu.....f09a6
2) Press the button to "Add Shortcut."
2) You will now be in the Shortcuts app. In the bottom bar, choose "Automations" (on my phone it's the middle icon)
3) On the top of the new screen that opens, press the "+" button.
4) You'll now be at a screen called "Personal Automation." Scroll down and choose "CarPlay." (You want this shortcut to run when something happens to CarPlay)
5) Choose "Disconnects" (I.e. run this automation when the phone disconnects from CarPlay)
and "Run immediately" (you don't want to have to click on an alert for this to run)
And choose "Next" (top right)
6) Now search for the shortcut you just added and select it.
All done! Now you can go back to your home screen. Any time CarPlay disconnects, the shortcut will run and ask you if you checked for your kids.
If you want to edit the list of questions, go back to the Shortcuts app, make sure you're on the "Shortcuts" tab (left hand tab), search for the Car Safety shortcut, press the three dots in the top right, and add or delete any items from the list.
|
Anyone else have problem doing this? I make shortcut car safety but it doesn’t come up so I can add it
| |
|
Back to top |
0
0
|
Related Topics |
Replies |
Last Post |
|
|
Saying no to a child - intuition
|
33 |
Fri, Nov 22 2024, 2:29 pm |
|
|
Any ideas for a child that wants to learn engineering?
|
40 |
Fri, Nov 22 2024, 1:25 pm |
|
|
How do you decide when to save and when to spend?
|
20 |
Fri, Nov 22 2024, 9:00 am |
|
|
Lap Child Birthday mid travel, buy return ticket?
|
5 |
Thu, Nov 21 2024, 1:27 am |
|
|
My child needs a personal invitation
|
9 |
Wed, Nov 20 2024, 5:58 pm |
|
|
Imamother may earn commission when you use our links to make a purchase.
© 2024 Imamother.com - All rights reserved
| |
|
|
|
|
|