Brother hurting younger sister

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 3:43 am

Our 7 year old daughter winds up her 9 year old brother and then he lashes out and hurts her- he is quite strong and she is quite little. When my mum saw this (I have one sister, no brothers) she was shocked and thought it could lead to him being violent against women when he is older.. I was then shocked by her negative interpretation and thought it was normal (non ideal) sibling behaviour. Thoughts please?

amother

Cherry

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 3:46 am

I have the same with my 12 yr old daughter and 10 year old son.

Im sorry.

Elfrida

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 3:51 am

Sounds normal, as long as he is not causing any real injuries.

Obviously not to be encouraged, and co sequences as appropriate. As she gets older and bigger she'll be better able to defend herself.

abound

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 3:55 am

You do realize that she is the aggressor!?

They both have skills to learn. He needs to learn how to avct when someone bullys/ bothers him. She needs to learn not to bother and bully and manipulate.

This is all within normal behavior.

amother

Gladiolus

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 6:35 am

Normal, it's what siblings do. Now, normal doesn't mean acceptable. They both need to be taught to behave better. But, that's why kids are still kids at 7 and 9, because they are not adult yet at those ages and still have lots to learn. Normal means nothing worrisome is happening, just kids are being kids and they need to work on it.

WhatFor

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 7:15 am

Can you give examples of what she's doing to wind him up? I'm wondering why she keeps doing that if it predictably leads to him physically harming her. Is she doing normal things but he feels wound up or is she deliberately going up to him and provoking him?

If it's the latter, she needs to learn socially acceptable behaviors for getting his attention and that she needs to respect boundaries when someone tries to assert them.

And either way, DS needs to learn how to assert boundaries without getting violent. If she's actually behaving inappropriately toward him, that might involve you backing him up and stopping her from doing that. If she's just doing normal things in his presence that he deems "annoying" then he needs to learn how to regulate himself without attacking people around him.

amother

Thistle

Mon, Jul 22 2024, 7:23 am

Check out on you tube Brooks Gibbs on social skills and bullying. Just discovered it and it's unbelievable! A must for every parent.
(there are shorter and longer videos depending on how much time you have!)

Page 1 of 1