How do you shop for teen?

emee2

Wed, Jun 26 2024, 11:33 pm

You have to set limits. I have 2 teenager girls. My girls go away for the summer to camp. They keep the same clothes from year to year because it’s basic t shirts. I update with a few new things that are trendy and fashionable but often I buy it without them and just give it to them. My daughter needs 4 new collared shirts this summer and one skirt. I ordered her a no the carlo on Amazon and shirts I took her to 2 stores so far with no luck. In our case the camp doesn’t allow zippers or denim so it wasn’t her fault but either way she has Friday and Sunday morning and then I’m done we will just have to choose something or she makes do with what she has. You can’t become a slave to this.

amother

Amber

Wed, Jun 26 2024, 11:41 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks! I have tshirts, the one thing I found on Amazon. Skirts she refuses to wear an inch past her knee, and only black. I found one single skirt that she agrees to wear.

This
https://www.amazon.com/Lock-Lo.....ss_tl
She can fold the top so it's the exact length she wants. Get it as back up, If she wants something different let her figure it out herself and you'll return.

amother

Wed, Jun 26 2024, 11:50 pm

amother Amber wrote:

Thanks:) she has this skirt in multiple colors. Unfortunately she won't wear it.

amother

Wed, Jun 26 2024, 11:52 pm

emee2 wrote:

Slave is a good word for this. And she only gets more demanding instead of more flexible every time we return another item.

amother

Amber

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 12:06 am

OMG getting axiety reading this. I feel like this is going to be my daughter in a couple years. She's only 2 ( Laugh

) but super choosy with her clothes!
Wishing you the best of luck. My suggestion is to not discuss it anymore with her. Sounds like she has options to take if she chooses not go unclothed.

seeker

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 12:09 am

I just want to validate that it sounds like your DD has an especially hard time with shopping. I'm like that myself, bh my DDs seem to be a little better but I see some of the same traits. Shopping is complicated! You need to make decisions out of a large field of options, and you're looking for something that you personally like, but also your friends will like, and also your parents will approve (which possibly comes with price limitations) and also is right for your shape, and also is comfortable (times 100 if you have sensory exceptionalities)...

I'm not sure setting a time limit would help. People like me really benefit from someone who is really good at facilitating this. You can't just say "go shopping with your friends" - you need a talented friend (or aunt, talented aunts are the best, and Mom's bff can be your aunt too) who has both a good eye for style and also a good touch for how to give the right level of guidance - they need to be able to listen enough to know what you like and don't like and not pressure you into something that's not right, but then they need to apply the right amount of pressure to get you to make a decision at the right time.

amother

Lemonchiffon

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 12:23 am

seeker wrote:

I'm not sure setting a time limit would help.

It won't help the daughter find a skirt, but it will definitely help OP stop running around like headless chicken.
It's totally ok for her to express her boundary in the amount of time she's willing to spend on this. The daughter can choose to keep looking if she wants.

imaima

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 1:35 am

amother OP wrote:

How do you shop for and with your teenager if she says no to everything in the store and insists on going to more stores? Repeat at the next store and the next. And the next and the next. I'm exhausted. Then she blames me for not buying her clothing. How many hours of shopping am I expected to fulfill?

I let her send me links or take pictures of what she likes but she needs a smartphone for that

imaima

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 1:37 am

amother OP wrote:

I'm so tempted to except she's going to overnight camp soon and needs to not go empty-handed.

How does everyone else get their girls clothing?

I would wait it out till she naturally has to accept and wear the udel order. I mean, it’s already there?! TMI

amother

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 3:13 am

amother Opal wrote:

OP I’m in the same position. Please can you send the Amazon links for the tshirts you found? I could really use for my DD

We bought this in a bunch of colors:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d.....ss_tl

They're soft, breathable, pretty colors.

GLUE

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 4:45 am

imaima wrote:

I would wait it out till she naturally has to accept and wear the udel order. I mean, it’s already there?! TMI

When my sister and I were teens my mother would buy us clothes to hang in the closet.
Not for us to wear because we did not like the clothes.
We ended up wearing them because there was nothing else to wear.

amother

Rainbow

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 6:09 am

The problem your teen is having is too many choices and she’s overwhelmed so nothing is good. I have this with one of my teens. I show her 6 of each thing black skirts, denim skirts, floral blouses…. And she can choose. If nothing is good then I give her cash and say figure it out. Go with friends. By yourself. But don’t complain to me nothing to wear.many times also someone at the store will help her find things and she generally gets what the lady suggested

Iymnok

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 6:23 am

I won't buy myself anything unless I have a vision before I leave. So if I say I'm getting a black skirt ant weekday tops, then I will be more successful since I won't look at anything else. I look, not it? Move on.
I insist my teenage girls have a vision before I take them out. I also ask them what they expect to pay. One is an awkward size, so I will spend more since she seems to have stopped growing, and takes care of her clothes.

Shoes, we know what's available. I looked with her at the Nike website, there are 4 plain white shoes in a style shed wear. She doesn't like them. So she felt comfortable getting plain white Adidas since she knew she didn't have another choice.
Now it's her choice to wear them now or save them for school.

amother

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 8:03 am

amother Steel wrote:

Does she have difficulty making decisions and/or anxiety in general or is this the only area you see it in?

This is insightful. She's usually easygoing, popular, hardworking. But she does have that perfectionist side to her, I haven't seen it since she was very young, it must be coming out now as a teen in the way she wants to present herself.

Coffee beanz

Thu, Jun 27 2024, 8:07 am

I don't live in town so do a lot online at the jewish stores. Double header has skirts that are great. My teen find a skirt they like and I buy a bunch of them to wear. As in 5 of the same skirt

I also tailor as needed it's worth it for them to actually wear it.
Shabbos clothing I drive an hour plus one time a season if need be but do most of my shopping online. I try to buy early so I can return.

I do usually need to go to at least 3 stores in person and countless websites.

Is your daughter feeling worried about her appearance or fitting in at camp? Maybe that's why it's extra hard now