Help me, my oldest dd just got her period 1st time

amother

↑ Butterscotch ↓

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:04 pm

amother Zinnia wrote:

So cool. I just bought a package. But how do the reusable ones works?

I never bought reusable and I dont know what it is

amother

↑ Butterscotch ↓

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:07 pm

and if I may say, I think its a chesed to tell ppl about these... they are so comfy and practical and I wish I wouldve known about them in my teen years
I literally attended a siblings wedding when I was freshly post partum , wore a "white dress" and was perfectly comfortable that I wont leak.. ppl were like "but how..?" bla bla bla.

amother

Nemesia

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:31 pm

amother Catmint wrote:

Thank you for the validation! I can't really talk about it in real life so...also, get the girls The Wonder of Becoming You by Dr Miriam Grossman. My mother got it for me as well.

I hated getting this book. I guess diff strokes. I’m gonna have a face to face with DD and answer Qs.

amother

Steelblue

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:38 pm

amother NeonBlue wrote:

I also slide a great piece of chocolate and advise at least once a day for the duration of their period. Works for me so it surely must woek for them.

No eye contact is super important 😀

Why not just give her the book 'The Wonder of Becoming You'? Much easier, no eye contact needed!!

ETA I see now someone else already recommended this book. I was the shy type about such topics and was so happy my mother gave me this book!

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:46 pm

Thank you all. She's 13 and pretty mature And independent. I don't think she'd appreciate having a whole big deal made about it so I'm not going to do anything that calls more attention to it. Before she went to bed, I asked her if she figured it out and has any questions. She said she's fine. I just reminded her to take a few along with her to school. And that was that. She seems fine.

amother

↑ Butterscotch ↓

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:49 pm

amother OP wrote:

Great job, mom! You know your child BEST

amother

Turquoise ↓

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:54 pm

amother Jean wrote:

Ok I got this: take your daughter out in the car. Drive someplace on a highway. No eye contact. Repeat no eye contact. Say your piece . Idk if you have the option but I found that having a monthly automatic delivery gets rid of the awkward
Also pads are not cute. But mini bags are adorable! I got a tiny mini bag for my daughter

What is a mini bag? Links?

I’m at my wits end with my 11 year old she is so immature and gets her period so often!

amother

↑ Turquoise

Mon, Jun 17 2024, 11:54 pm

amother OP wrote:

Lucky. My dd got it way too young and it’s torture

amother

Whitesmoke

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 12:16 am

amother Butterscotch wrote:

YES, I will buy this for my girls when its time.
I only discovered this when I was post partum and it saved me... ppl dont save money on this...

Same!! Just had a baby and wearing them, it’s the best ever! No rashes, no itching, no adjusting…. I HATE pads, this underwear is a lifesaver.

amother

↑ NeonPurple ↓

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 12:30 am

amother Steelblue wrote:

PLEASE don't just dump a book on a young girl and leave her to figure it out
Even if you ask her afterwards if she has any questions, some personalities won't be comfortable asking anything
You know your daughter and her personality - take this into account
Signed, adult who did not appreciate this approach as a girl

↑ tree of life

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 1:10 am

amother Zinnia wrote:

I still don’t understand how it works. Where does all the blood go. How does it not leak? How are you not sloshing around with blood in your undies?

My kids actually wear a pad with it so any leakages don't go through there skirt as the worry was not good for them now they go to school more relaxed
Only came out after I had my 4 th girl so I saw what the older three worried about I'm glad my youngest didn't have to worry

DrMom ↓

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 1:16 am

amother Jean wrote:

What on earth??

↑ DrMom

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 1:19 am

If you already gave her info about getting her period, then I'm sure she can figure out how to use a pad (or period underwear). If not, there are instructions and illustrations on the box. Of course, buy her some so she has a stock in the house.

You can get her a small discreet bag to stash a small supply so she can take some to school or camp or whatever.

amother

Babypink

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 1:29 am

Period Underwear and Reusable pads have an extremely absorbent core in the center that absorbs all the blood and you absolutely don’t feel like sitting in a puddle. Also depending on the material some are more absorbent than others. I’ve been using reusable pads for nearly 10 years now and they are the best thing everThe plastic disposable always made me rashes etc. and I hated them.

amother

Honeydew

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 2:13 am

amother NeonPurple wrote:

hear hear!
my mother gave me the purple book and offered to answer any questions. but there was a sense of shame and embarrassment somehow so I said I'm fine. I DID have questions, about a million .... I opened my biology textbooks and dictionaries and figured it all out with my bff.

but I wish I would have known about cramps before they hit me the first time. that was a nasty shock! I thought my body was broken!

imaima

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 2:20 am

amother Steelblue wrote:

It’s a mother’s job to do.
I also think it’s a mother’s job to tell her daughter that she will leak through tissues and everyone will know she is on period.
I don’t get the tiptoeing.
Sure she can decide to use tissues, but you as a mom have more experience and know how it will end.

amother

↑ NeonPurple ↓

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 10:18 am

amother Honeydew wrote:

Exactly
Hugs!

amother

Slategray ↓

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 10:24 am

amother Nasturtium wrote:

Show her how to put the pads on. And I bought my dd a small pouch to keep pads in for school

Seriously since when do girls need a demonstration how to use pads? If there are instructions on them package we all assumed she knows how to read, don't we?

tulip3 ↓

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 10:34 am

amother Slategray wrote:

Seriously since when do girls need a demonstration how to use pads? If there are instructions on them package we all assumed she knows how to read, don't we?

the pads I buy dont have instructions-ive never seen instructions in general. I showed my daughter before the age she could get her period and then once she got it, I showed again (after asking, "do you remember how to put it on?").

Why are some/most of you so uncomfortable with talking about periods? I am so curious to understand this. Please work through you shame/embarrassment over a functional factual body part/experience so that you don't pass this on to your kids. How do you think they will learn about relations if there's so much uncomfortableness with just a period? If we/you cant look at our daughters in the eye when talking about body parts, fluid, function, how will they be magically comfortable to ask questions about this and more adult topics that will come up?

Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Tue, Jun 18 2024, 10:35 am

amother Jean wrote:

Please seek help. Still today.