Sheva Brachos hosting question

myboubala

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 2:56 am

I am a BT and I have a question about sheva brachos for my child. I was told that a parent should not host a sheva brachos for their child. I would love to host it. Should I not?

amother

Tealblue

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 3:09 am

I can't say I've ever heard this as a 'thing'. It's quite common for parents to do shabbos sheva brochos. I think practically it's difficult to do the wedding prep, and also prepare for a sheva brochos. It's a lot of work.
It also depends on whether you have a lot of family, or friends that will offer to do sheva brochos, and then you don't have to worry about making as there's enough people who've offered.

amother

Dimgray

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 3:46 am

I've hosted Sheva brachos for my children, and we've been guests where parents have hosted for their children.
Yeshivish and chassidish parents have done this.
Usually parents host if they are short of hosts, they actively want to host eg. Shabbos Sheva brachos, or they can't invite everyone they want to the seuda so host a Sheva brachos and invite the overflow then.
Go with what works for you.

amother

Bellflower

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 6:28 am

Shabbos sheva brachos the girls side typically hosts
aunts and uncles take some other days, close friends and neighbors everyone has theirs differently and it’s all very special there’s no one way or right way

amother

Smokey

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 7:18 am

myboubala wrote:

I am a BT and I have a question about sheva brachos for my child. I was told that a parent should not host a sheva brachos for their child. I would love to host it. Should I not?

Pretty universal (though Im sure there are exceptions) for kallahs parents to host shobbos sheva brachos.

The weekday ones are typically hosted by friends/ family, so maybe thats what they meant? I dont think you "cant" . Im not sure what the context of this advice was.

Ive also seen here and there (so not common, probably because its expensive) when people make a wedding far away from their city ive seen the parents make a big sheva brachos in their hometown so they can have their friends join in the simcha.

Chayalle

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 8:35 am

My parents hosted one of my Sheva Brachos. My mother AH was an only child who didn't have siblings to host for her, so she made one herself.

amother

Snow

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 8:41 am

The girls side usually host Shabbos sheva brachos so it’s not common for them to host another one on top of that, but it’s not like it’s never done. Not everyone has people to make it for them and if you want to definitely go ahead!
On the boys side I have seen a bunch of times the parents making, sometimes because they don’t have other people to make for them and sometimes because they want

Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 8:43 am

amother Smokey wrote:

Depends in which circles.
In Israel chareidi circles many skip out the shabbos chattan (no kiddush in shul) and both sides share costs of shabbos sheva brachot.
This has become very common, people are financially strained already.

ddmom

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 8:52 am

There is no halacha that parents can't make sheva brachos for their children but practically speaking it's a hard thing to do so it's just not done!!
If you want to, you absolutely can!! Mazal tov!!

lamplighter

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 9:34 am

In my circles, shabbos sheva brochos is usually hosted by the parents. Many times it's split, Friday night one side, shabbos day the other side.
Doing a weekday Sheva Brochos is hard because you just made a wedding and if you cab get others to host thats easier. There is no halachic or hashkafic reason not to do one yourself. Go for it if you want to but it is really a lot of work on top of making a wedding the same week.

amother

Babypink

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 9:44 am

Note that by Sefaradim it's the boys side that make the Shabbos Sheva Brochos which is called Shabbat Chatan.

We've sometimes done a small family only meal e.g. wedding was Weds & nobody offered Thursday so we just had bagels etc for sibs w a couple neighbors dropping in for dessert.

amother

Waterlily

Wed, Feb 28 2024, 11:24 am

My parents actually did not host shabbos sheva brachos. 2 very close families did the main meals (just family) and my parents sponsored shalosh seudos in shul. That said my in-laws hosted on for us.