Help my student make friends- spectrum

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Forum -> Working Women -> Teachers' Room

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amother

OP ↓

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:26 am

My student is definitely on the spectrum always overstepping boundaries, has a hard time reading social cues and doesn’t always understand giving people space are there any books I can use or a speech to listen to it pains me when she comes over and cries to me that she has no friends cuz she’s rlly right how can I close the gap? It almost seems impossible she doesn’t see what’s wrong has anyone had success with this? She’s a 5th grader

dena613 ↓

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:29 am

Please please advise her parents to send her for therapy to Learn social skills, and then ask for permission to speak to the therapist so she can tell you what they're working on so you can implement them

amother

↑ OP

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:45 am

Unfortunately her parents are in denial and blame it on the school I cannot bear to hear her cry about it again and would love to give her the support she needs if possible

Brit in Israel

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:58 am

Does the girls in the class do collections if stickers or something?
If yes tell her parents to buy her some of the 'expensive' type that all the girls want.
If they play jump rope, elastic or ball during recess
She should bring one, a long one that the girls enjoy.
It may not make her real friends but will hopefully make her feel less lonely.

smss

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 2:27 am

It's very challenging.
My heart always breaks for these kids whose parents won't get them help. There is so much good help out there these days and it's so frustrating to see a child struggling for no good reason!

amother

NeonYellow

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 4:55 am

What age? Can you read "Mister Lister" to them?

LovesHashem

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 8:48 am

Hi I was that child.

A speech won't help. Neither will a one time book.

She needs one on one social skills coaching. Is there a school guidance counselor or someone on staff that can meet with her a bit without her parents knowing?

↑ dena613

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 9:04 am

amother OP wrote:

Unfortunately her parents are in denial and blame it on the school I cannot bear to hear her cry about it again and would love to give her the support she needs if possible

Can the school force the parents to go for a neuropsych eval or something of that sort?

Highstrung

Thu, Oct 19 2023, 9:12 am

I agree that the girl should be getting coaching in social skills. But at the same time I believe so much in teaching the entire class the importance of sharing , loving , caring and being friends with girls that are not just like them. It may be challenging and hard sometimes and maybe not as fun. But when you can befriend any type of girl regardless of her issues and limitations there will be so much chesed being done and it’s a huge zchus.
It is also a chesed for themselves. When they grow into adults they will be much less judgmental of others and it will come easy for them to be that way.

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