Dressing kids in style how important?

amother

↑ Silver

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 8:06 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

In Lakewood you can get really nice clothes very cheap at Serendipity.

But they won't be matching.

So maybe the question is
" how important is matching?"

Op already said she's not in Lakewood.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 8:31 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

In Lakewood you can get really nice clothes very cheap at Serendipity.

But they won't be matching.

So maybe the question is
" how important is matching?"

No not matching this has nothing to do with matching. They're too old for that. And also not in Lakewood (although it seems most of this site is Wink

)

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 8:31 pm

nechamala wrote:

OP, you can also get really good styles, brands and quality for good prices in Marshall’s, tj max and Nordstrom rack

I've actually found nordstrom rack stuff to fall apart (ladies clothes) unless they're the brand names in which case they're same price

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 8:32 pm

amother Puce wrote:

For UGGs - have you tried eBay or Poshmark?

Thanks I don't need the brand name. Just ones that look somewhat like it. Also I'd rather buy cheaper and get new than buy the brand name and get a used pair.

amother

Oldlace

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 9:03 pm

Its very important that they aren't embarrassed and feel they can hold theirhead up high. But at the same time, its very important that they don't get attached to labels. Style is style and they get what you can afford.

That said they can soon start making money like babysitting and can spend on what they want if they want to save up. And hand me downs are a great gift!

There is a great need for a hand me down shaddchan chesed gemach to match people up.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 9:05 pm

amother Oldlace wrote:

I love hand me downs. Don't get much though.

amother

↑ Papayawhip ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 9:09 pm

amother Geranium wrote:

https://alispecials.com/products/down-puffer-coat alispecials a Jewish company produces in China and sells on Aliexpress. It's down filled super warm good quality coats.

There's nothing wrong with the Old Navy coat, but it seems like her kids are bothered by it. Old Navy coats are also usually poly filled so they aren't as warm, the quality also isn't the greatest.

Don’t fool yourself that Ali Express is any greater quality than Old Navy.

amother

Hyssop

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 9:18 pm

amother Geranium wrote:

I thought she was talking about this- the Ali picks label. Unless they are the same thing?

notshanarishona

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 9:31 pm

If you can’t afford it, I don’t understand the question. You definitely shouldn’t go into debt to buy something in style. If you have the money and it’s a question of what to prioritize it for then I could see it being a shayla.

amother

Snapdragon ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 10:09 pm

amother Papayawhip wrote:

Literally nothing. Old Navy is much better than anything from Ali Express, which is garbage made from slave labor. I am curious to see which coat you are all talking about though.

The Ali coats I know about not garbage. It’s very high quality real down and real fur.

amother

↑ Snapdragon

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 10:11 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks I don't need the brand name. Just ones that look somewhat like it. Also I'd rather buy cheaper and get new than buy the brand name and get a used pair.

You can find new with tags on those sites for significantly cheaper than retail.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 10:28 pm

amother Snapdragon wrote:

You can find new with tags on those sites for significantly cheaper than retail.

Ok, but still I don't need the brand name. In fact I specifically don't want it. Just wondering if I should buy my girls what's in style or something from Old Navy

amother

↑ Leaf ↓

Thu, Sep 21 2023, 10:43 pm

amother Geranium wrote:

So it’s like the S13 I bought at Costco 4 or 5 years ago. (I think I paid less at Costco)

amother

↑ Chocolate

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 1:27 am

amother OP wrote:

Ok, but still I don't need the brand name. In fact I specifically don't want it. Just wondering if I should buy my girls what's in style or something from Old Navy

I am similar but I realized some brand names are popular for a reason. This week I had a breakthrough. My daughter was always ok with whatever I bought her (or sewed) as a preteen and now as a teen she is having needs. I never purchased anything from Lulu lemon or other trends. I think it’s silly.

It was my daughter’s birthday and we went to the mall. I let her buy the most popular and expensive Ugg slippers because they were more comfortable than other styles. She loves them for the comfort and appreciates I spent more $$ for something she will enjoy more I didn’t just buy it for the brand. She feels so happy her self esteem went up. The next day we went through last years clothes and she was happy to wear them. The week before she would say she needs more/different.

I also bought her Kate spade earring because they were cute and cheap. I teach her that we look at value not just name.

I also finally bought Birkenstocks for myself (I have foot problems) I realized they are expensive and popular for a reason. It was a relief to allow myself to not have to be smarter/different than others.

amother

↑ Leaf

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 1:33 am

Someone just mentioned buying Birkenstocks.
Aren’t they a German company/product of Germany?
When did the frum community start making German products a must buy? Aren’t Naot fairly comparable and a product of Israel?
I really am out of it!

amother

Bottlebrush

Fri, Sep 22 2023, 4:22 am

OP, I think you need a Rebbetzin, not a Rabbi for this kind of question.
My kids aren't there yet(still young), and we live in a VERY out-of-the-way community anyway, but I know that my husband grew up with hand-me-downs and although we buy a LOT of second-hand clothing for all of us (in beautiful condition), we think it's very important to buy our kids something brand new once in a while- usually for RH/Pesach.
I don't think teenage girls' needs should be laughed at. I also don't think people should go into debt for them.
I do think you should be having down-to-earth discussions with your daughter about brands and the like. It can be a once-in-a-while buy- if you can afford it. It's good for her to see you care. It makes her feel good. But her self-image should not be dependent on these things. Tachlis, it's complicated Wink

I do think a wise woman figure may be the right address. You don't need a dry halachic answer. You need a wise woman who understands what a teenage girl is going through as well as your financial constraints.