Where are all the formula mommies?

amother

OP ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:18 am

I feel like I’m surrounded by women who EBF until 12, 18, or 24 months. My babies always end up combo feeding, and eventually completely on formula at pretty young ages.

My current baby is little but he is exclusively formula fed at this point. I really wanted to make it work but I was forced to supplement very early. Then my supply completely tanked and here we are, done nursing by 3 months Sad

I know I’m feeding my baby the best way I can. I know formula fed babies do just fine. I just can’t help getting pulled back into that feeling of inadequacy again. I’m embarrassed to give my tiny baby bottles when everyone else is exclusively nursing. The way some people talk about giving formula…it’s like they shudder.

I’m just looking for some solidarity here. If you are a formula feeding mother, please raise your hand!

amother

Cadetblue ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:22 am

Yes me!!! I started off doing both as within 2 weeks, he refused to nurse and only took bottles. My night nurse told me to give up nursing because it was clear he was refusing and I’ve been so happy giving him formula and knowing how much he’s getting

WitchKitty

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:30 am

2 of DH's siblings had babies the same week I did.
Friday night my 2 SILs are are sitting on the couch nursing.
I disappear into the bedroom to give the bottle LOL

amother

Gladiolus ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:35 am

Nursing makes me so miserable so I stop a few weeks or months in and my mental health gets so much better. The babies sleep better though the night, I don’t have to hide out to nurse, feedings take faster, it’s just so much better! And I have peace of mind knowing my baby is eating enough because I know the number of oz they had.

Only downside is the expense but it’s worth spending on. I say that as a person slowly paying down debt. My mental health is worth the money.

Some people do judge me for formula feeding and I just learn from that that they’re not that empathetic or life experienced in this regard. I roll my eyes at them and move on with my day. Because of how sad nursing made me, I feel pity for women that I see nursing, not jealousy.

I know a bunch of people who were formula fed and are now fully healthy, amazing adults. That helps me know I’m not doing anything wrong. BH for formula!

amother

Caramel ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:39 am

I do both. I always do my best to start off nursing, but it is terrible for my mental health. I'm currently weaning my 4 month old. Right now we are still on half and half. It is already making such a difference though for me.

amother

Mimosa

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:41 am

I pretty much had the same situation as you. I went through a LOT to try to breastfeed successfully and I wish someone had helped me realize I didn't need to do that. Unfortunately the pressure was all for nursing.
And maybe it's your friend group but amongst the women I know it's a pretty even mix. And of the working mothers I know who nurse, many do a combination of nursing and formula.
With my first couple kids, I was very self conscious. Now I'm much more confident. I'm feeding my babies so that they're healthy and growing. I do not have to justify it to anyone and it doesn't have to be an absolute last resort.

gootlfriends

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:41 am

Nursed 2 babies. My 3rd couldn't nurse. Pumped at first but by 6 weeks I was formula feeding. My 4th I pumped 3 months. I personally find formula annoying but nursing takes a lot of time.

SuperWify

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:43 am

I start off combo feeding by 5/6 months we are both done and I’m 15 pounds fatter and soooo relived to have myself back to myself.

And I’m not ashamed to admit it.

amother

Ecru

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:47 am

Formula mommy 🙋🏻‍♀️ my kids so far had ties
and were unable to nurse properly. (Didn’t realize it with the first, only dawned on me with my second but I incorrectly assumed that ties are only an issue with nursing and bottle feeding would avoid that…boy was I wrong)

amother

Whitewash

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:52 am

My 3 kids grew up on formula! I've got breast dysplasia and never had anywhere near enough milk and the bit I had would fizzle out after a few weeks. The kids are fine healthwise B"H.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:54 am

So glad to have found some peers!

I always start off nursing, but once I go back to work I end up having to supplement (pumping doesn’t work for me), and it’s downhill from there. Usually done nursing by 5 months.

This time I was just so disappointed because my baby wasn’t gaining and I had to start supplementing already before 2 weeks. Poor guy was starving and I know I did the right thing, I just feel sad that my body wasn’t able to do its job.

On the other hand, I don’t always love nursing. Formula definitely has some perks so I am trying to focus on them. I just can’t help feeling embarrassed in front of all the nursing mothers.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:55 am

amother Whitewash wrote:

My 3 kids grew up on formula! I've got breast dysplasia and never had anywhere near enough milk and the bit I had would fizzle out after a few weeks. The kids are fine healthwise B"H.

Yes BH my kids are all smart, beautiful and healthy. It’s really just in the baby stage that I feel this pang.

amother

Dustypink

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 9:57 am

I combo fed most of my kids and let me just say it was so nice to go out and just pull out a bottle and not a breast! And not pumped milk either. I literally could take a bottle full of water and a container of formula and mix the formula on the spot!

And if I could get to a sink, I could clean the bottle and then make more.

amother

Cyan

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 10:12 am

Nursed my oldest for a bit, hated it. Others formula from day 1. All adults now. My oldest has inherited food allergies, other than that no medical issues. They were not sick often at all as babies but to be fair they were not in daycare. Formula stains on clothes were a pain and it was expensive but that was the only way for me. My mil was a la leche member but too darn bad.

My daughter loves nursing her babies.

amother

↑ Caramel ↓

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 10:17 am

I really think at the end of the day everyone needs to do what works for them. I have also nursed some babies more than others because it worked for that kid/that time. Either not I was not working or the baby nursed really well. Some people find nursing easier and some find formula.
What is so important though is to not feel ashamed regardless. You are feeding your baby. That's what is important.

Busybee5

Sun, Jun 04 2023, 10:22 am

Me!
I tried with all of them, but only managed 1 for a year. The others I only managed a couple of weeks.
As long as baby is fed and happy it doesn't matter how you get them fed.