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Aylat
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 11:58 am
BrisketBoss wrote: | I think this comes back to the thing I keep wondering about: Why can people not grasp the concept of generalizations? Is it our driving urge to be assured that we are 'normal?'
There are differences between men and women and they are useful to know about. We are individuals too, with individual strengths and interests. That doesn't mean we should ignore the male/female divides. We can acknowledge them even where they don't apply to us.
I really, seriously, do not understand what makes this so difficult. I am open to thoughts. |
Personally I have almost never found the generalisations to be accurate when applied to specific individuals (myself, DH, my children, other people I know). Maybe I am just surrounded by exceptions? So I don't put much stock in them. I think it's much more useful to take each person as they are and respond to them accordingly.
Let me turn the question towards you. You said these generalisations of male-female differences are useful. Can you give me some examples of how and when?
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sushilover
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 12:40 pm
I think it's important to recognize that Matt Walsh has a very specific deadpan sense of humor and not everything he says should be taken at face value.
Additionally, he is a devout Catholic, so I don't expect to agree with everything he believes- and that's OK. That doesn't mean he doesn't have important and intelligent things to say about many topics and specifically about gender ideology. In fact, I can't think of a single commentator that I like who I agree with 100%. (Steven Crowder uses crude humor, Bill Mahr is pro elective abortion and many other left wing values, Dave Rubin is a gay Liberal, nuancebro is an isolationist arab? Turk? who seems to want to end financial support for Israel, Joe Rogan is a Bernie Sanders loving stoner...I can go on)
If someone comes out with an important documentary, we should be able to discuss and debate the merit of his arguments, not whether or not his views about women are "problematic" and make him a "bad person".
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miami85
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 12:40 pm
amother [ Lightyellow ] wrote: | I am very fortunate that B”H my husband can take care of himself very well (as can I) and gender stereotypes don’t work very well in our marriage.
I find that stereotyping and rigid gender expectations often lead to unhealthy demands and expectations. I don’t agree with the whole trans movement (which is apparently out of touch with biological reality) but flexibility in expectations of gender roles is a big improvement from the old 1950s (and before) outlook. |
Fine that makes you unique, doesn't mean that the opposite doesn't have some truth.
Case en pointe, this morning I dealt with 5 kids each having their own personal "crisis" while my husband took one child to an outing for a few hours, came home and took a nap. While I ate lunch at 3pm
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cupcake123
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 12:46 pm
miami85 wrote: | Some people don't like that 1)Ben Shapiro is more Modern Orthodox and doesn't always have mainstream Orthodox opinions 2) Andrew Klavan is a Jew who went off the derech and is now an observant Christian 3)Matt Walsh and Jeremy Boering are observant Catholics.
However, one can acknowledge that these guys have an overall better and more intelligent view of American Politics than anyone on CNN or MSNBC. |
1. Hes not my rabbi
2. I hear
3. Why can't they be?
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miami85
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 12:50 pm
cupcake123 wrote: | 1. Hes not my rabbi
2. I hear
3. Why can't they be? |
Exactly, just pointing out why some people don't like The Daily Wire. We like it just aren't subscribers because we don't want to pay for something that mostly serves our purposes for free.
I want to see the documentary, I'm hoping at some point it will become available without subscription.
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hodeez
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 12:53 pm
If anyone is watching this documentary with open eyes, they will see the main argument is stop transing the kids! Especially when it is being presented as harmless and the key to their happiness. How in the world we got to this point idk.
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sushilover
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 1:03 pm
Aylat wrote: | Personally I have almost never found the generalisations to be accurate when applied to specific individuals (myself, DH, my children, other people I know). Maybe I am just surrounded by exceptions? So I don't put much stock in them. I think it's much more useful to take each person as they are and respond to them accordingly.
Let me turn the question towards you. You said these generalisations of male-female differences are useful. Can you give me some examples of how and when? |
Here are just some examples of generalizations between male and female and why they are useful:
1) in education. Boys and girls learn differently in general. So in general, boys should not be treated like misbehaving girls and girls should not be treated like docile boys. We should be aware that they have different needs and respond to those needs appropriately.
2) In mental health. Many mental health issues are displayed differently between men and women. Males should be compared to males and females should be compared to females when trying to understand if someone has an issue in certain areas.
One good example is ADD. The reason why many girls are not diagnosed is because they seem to be functioning well compared to boys. But they shouldn't be compared to boys, they should be compared to the average girl!
3) In intimacy. As society has been encouraging women to be more like men in relationships, women have only gotten more unhappy. Men in general may be ok with one night stands and meaningless sx. Women in general are not. We have generations of women who think there is something wrong with them because they are miserable doing what seems to make men so happy.
Are there some people who don't fit the generalisations of their sx?
Sure, that's part of being a unique human being.
But knowing the generalisations is still important. It doesn't help anyone to pretend that men and women are exactly the same in general.
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ra_mom
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 3:43 pm
flowerpower wrote: | https://youtu.be/stkSz507Ct0
Worth the watch!!!!! Worth every second of it |
Thanks for the link!
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bgr8ful
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 4:03 pm
amother [ Starflower ] wrote: | She’s new, no?
I’ve stayed away from the Daily Wire recently, mostly because of Walsh. |
Yes Brett is new.
She’s different from the other ones though in that she’s:
1. A gen z’er, she’s 24 and recently out of college, so she’s much younger than the other daily wire ppl
2. She doesn’t focus as heavily on politics. She discusses politics, but also pop culture, entertainment, reacts to videos/ tik toks…
She’s pretty good, I enjoy her videos. It’s more laid back than the other ones but still with the conservative outlook.
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amother
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:00 pm
sushilover wrote: | Here are just some examples of generalizations between male and female and why they are useful:
1) in education. Boys and girls learn differently in general. So in general, boys should not be treated like misbehaving girls and girls should not be treated like docile boys. We should be aware that they have different needs and respond to those needs appropriately.
2) In mental health. Many mental health issues are displayed differently between men and women. Males should be compared to males and females should be compared to females when trying to understand if someone has an issue in certain areas.
One good example is ADD. The reason why many girls are not diagnosed is because they seem to be functioning well compared to boys. But they shouldn't be compared to boys, they should be compared to the average girl!
3) In intimacy. As society has been encouraging women to be more like men in relationships, women have only gotten more unhappy. Men in general may be ok with one night stands and meaningless sx. Women in general are not. We have generations of women who think there is something wrong with them because they are miserable doing what seems to make men so happy.
Are there some people who don't fit the generalisations of their sx?
Sure, that's part of being a unique human being.
But knowing the generalisations is still important. It doesn't help anyone to pretend that men and women are exactly the same in general. |
Are these generalizations due to learned behavior?
I know that everyone here likes to negate social constructs, but are boys being subliminally taught that they need to be manly and rough?
I wonder how many of the above mentioned generalizations would apply if we were to remove social constructs.
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Zehava
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:03 pm
amother [ Starflower ] wrote: | Are these generalizations due to learned behavior?
I know that everyone here likes to negate social constructs, but are boys being subliminally taught that they need to be manly and rough?
I wonder how many of the above mentioned generalizations would apply if we were to remove social constructs. |
This has already been experimented with disastrous results. The documentary addresses this.
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Zehava
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:05 pm
I loved every second of the documentary. I don’t know Matt’s history I’ve never watched him before. But I agreed with every word he said in this specific instance.
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amother
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:14 pm
amother [ Starflower ] wrote: | Some women might be better suited to childcare. But that doesn’t mean that they can’t accomplish so much outside the home as well.
Walsh and his ilk can’t see past the rigid gender expectation, to see the whole person.
We are way more than our gender. | I believe that for the most part barring extenuating circumstances a mother is the best caretaker for her child. Not necessarily the menial work but the mothering work. It’s nuanced and may be different for everyone.
And of course you can accomplish more than that outside the home.
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amother
Diamond
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:21 pm
The problem is that when it comes to certain traits, people insist that individual men or women are something because the majority of their sx is. Most men are taller than most women, but when you see a 6 foot tall woman standing near a 5"4 man, you don't insist that he's actually taller than her. But people insist that a female lawyer would actually be better suited for homemaking.
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imorethanamother
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:26 pm
What is this thread going on about? That generalizations are good?
I feel like we were making real progress when we argued that women can do a lot of things men can do. By insisting that women must be women, and women can never leave this biological prison that she's in, you know what the result is?
Transgender. It's a direct response to you telling people that women are XYZ. So now every boy with a yearning to raise children or stay home or multitask or whatever you think women ought to be now has to cut off his private parts because he no longer feels like a boy.
Every woman who doesn't feel much like a mother but yearns to be a doctor now has to take testosterone.
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zohar
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 5:43 pm
Ironically, it's the progressive pro trans group who emphasize gender stereotypes. They leave no room for men with some feminine traits and even less room for masculine men. Especially, when they are surface level traits. For example, as a child, I liked playing with the boys. I was more interested in what they were interested in. Better in math and science. Liked building things. Felt uncomfortable in my skin and around other girls. Today, in left circles, I girl like me would be directed in a horrible irreversible direction. I group to be a quite stereotypical woman. I may still be interested in the men's conversation. (At extended family seudos, I might end up sitting at the table discussing frum politics and money/business topics). And while I now enjoy dressing up all feminine, I have a hard time spending time primping. But emotionally, full fledge woman. I totally fall into the stereotypes of women portraid in books such as Men are from Mars etc.
The general belief of those of us who are concerned with the pushing of transitioning of children, is that a boy who likes to wear makeup and heels is still a boy and a girl who hates pink and likes trucks is still a girl. You do not need to fulfill every stereotype of the gender your born with in order to remain in the club.
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cupcake123
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 6:41 pm
Thanks flowerpwer for posting
Was really great and so so sad
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sushilover
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 6:41 pm
amother [ Diamond ] wrote: | The problem is that when it comes to certain traits, people insist that individual men or women are something because the majority of their sx is. Most men are taller than most women, but when you see a 6 foot tall woman standing near a 5"4 man, you don't insist that he's actually taller than her. But people insist that a female lawyer would actually be better suited for homemaking. |
Which people?
People like Jordan Peterson (and presumably Matt Walsh, I don't know. I don't listen to his podcasts often enough) do claim that women generally tend toward more feminine roles the more egalitarian a society is. That's why Norway has a lower percentage of women in STEM than ,say, India.
That's are not saying that women should not be in STEM.
Peterson also has seen countless women over his years as a clinical psychologist who pursue high status careers like law and then give it up, or significantly reduce their hours in favor of motherhood some time in their 30s.
Telling women this is not quite the same as telling them that they are better suited for homemaking. It's just telling them the truth before they invest years and thousands of dollars.
Anyone who insists that all women are better homemakers or all men are better at math, etc, is stupid. But it's equally stupid to pretend that the generalisations don't exist just because there are exceptions.
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hodeez
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 7:16 pm
Speaking of matt Walsh, anyone got Johnny the Walrus?
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amother
Poppy
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Sun, Jun 12 2022, 7:18 pm
hodeez wrote: | Speaking of matt Walsh, anyone got Johnny the Walrus? |
I want to - but didn't yet. My kids are under 3.
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