Do you think I was wrong or were they nasty?

amother

↑ Burlywood

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 1:52 pm

If im over hearing someone is undecided about something and I know the answer, c'mon why not be helpful?! Im trying to imagine if it was me mixing in if I would speak up or resist . As I know myself I would probably speak up but also depending who they were and how they looked. Sometimes u can tell by just seeing the look of the ppl holding the conversation if they seem interested for my input or not. Its definitely not nice .

They werent even thankfull to you??

amother

↑ Slateblue

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 1:54 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Because they were sitting right next to me. And talking on a regular tone voice. They weren’t trying to whisper. Had they spoken in whispers I would assume it’s something private. And I would probably not even hear or intend to hear.
It’s the way they were talking that caught my attention in the first place.

So it’s the volume of someone’s voice which determines whether or not they’re asking for input from others around?
Not trying to sound condescending.
But really I’m learning something new...

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 1:54 pm

amother [ Slateblue ] wrote:

I’d never chime in like that to a conversation two people are having.
I’d feel so uncomfortable doing so and rude.
I don’t think that just because it’s a waiting room means it’s a conversation OPEN to the public and their opinions.
Maybe it’s not so private but so? Doesn’t mean it’s an open invitation to everyone else there.
So when you go up to the receptionist and talk to them about medication or such , someone can chime in too?
No sorry.
Mind your own business.
Not saying their reaction was ok at all. But I still don’t think it’s something people should feel entitled to do.
Sorry. Just don’t.

Talking about medication is a little different. That’s personal and should never ever be eavesdropped. What I experienced was very obviously not personal.

amother

Pumpkin

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 1:56 pm

Without knowing what they were talking about, its difficult to say. I mean, if it were hemorrhoid cream, then MYOB.

That said, nobody's right if everybody's wrong.

In general, most people won't mind if someone says "I'm sorry, I couldn't help overhearing that you were thinking of buying a Glubbity-Glub. I just bought one, and wasn't happy with it; its great at Glubbity, but awful at Glub."

But there's also nothing wrong with wanting your discussions to remain private.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 1:56 pm

amother [ Slateblue ] wrote:

So it’s the volume of someone’s voice which determines whether or not they’re asking for input from others around?
Not trying to sound condescending.
But really I’m learning something new...

The volume of their voice and the topic of the conversation

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 1:59 pm

amother [ Pumpkin ] wrote:

If they want it to remain private they should’ve lowered their voices. They were rather loud.
And no- it wasn’t hemmerhoid cream. Very Happy

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 2:02 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

Thankful? I wonder if that even exists in their dictionary according to the look they gave me.

↑ lilies

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 2:03 pm

amother [ Pumpkin ] wrote:

True but still no need for nasty glares on their part.

amother

Azure

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 2:07 pm

I was once at work and the guy in the cubicle over from me was having an HR issue and he was talking really loud and he was missing information that would help him. I waited till he was finished his conversation and then I went over and said I didn't mean to evesdrop but I sit right next to you and I went through this exact same issue and I did xyz and I did not end up having the issue you are worried about even though I had the same concern. He made me feel very stupid and I promised myself I would never try to help him again even if I know he needs it because he clearly didn't appreciate my comments. Then a few weeks later another women talking right next to me was having an issue that I also just dealt with and I gave her information cuz I couldn't help it. I knew she needed the help and she was so appreciative. So go figure. U win some u lose some.

amother

Lemon

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 2:33 pm

I have social anxiety. I could have a very nice conversation with a friend but if someone would join the conversation I would freeze! Some people might interpret it as being snobby when in fact there’s nothing I want more at that moment than to continue the conversation with more people and be friendly.

square_peg

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 2:33 pm

If they were talking about childrearing, or how to deal with a family member, etc. I'd understand if they didn't want to hear the input of an almost stranger. but if they're speaking of a product, (which is non-personal), why woulnd't you value someone's input. Also, its a specific type that gives those nasty looks. You can "think"its rude for someone to chime in without having the reaction on your face.

zaq

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 4:52 pm

OP you did nothing wrong imo. They should have been grateful—you could have saved them the trouble of buying something they wouldn’t be happy with. They should have thanked you EVEN if they thought you were rude to butt in. ( I think in UK this is rude but in US not so much and in Israel definitely not.) Their response was beyond rude.

Next time maybe preface your remark with a semi-apologetic “Sorry, I couldn’t help overhearing...)

amother

Mustard ↓

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 5:04 pm

IvriAnochi wrote:

How rude of them!
I would have been like, "on second thought, you guys should buy it. Bad products for bad attitudes!"

And that wouldn't be rude?

pizza4

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 5:06 pm

I think you were ok, people could be more friendly and polite.
I had a similar experience, only it was outside my daughters classroom at pta. I know one of them well and the other vaguely. They were talking about some kind of interior design and I added my 2 cents in a friendly way. Omg the look I got I backed away very fast.
On another occasion I had such an uncomfortable situation! Two neighbors were talking and it was personal (as in business advice) and I approached to share something... (I didn't realize they were talking so private) they actually backed away from me. I turned and fled, went inside. Shivers.

amother

Bisque

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 5:07 pm

If someone were to mix into a conversation I was having with someone, they'd get a stare from me. Not a rude type of stare, a stare that the person is being weird. It's weird to mix into a conversation 2 people are having, no matter how loud or topic of discussion. They're not talking to you, don't mix in.

↑ IvriAnochi

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 5:48 pm

amother [ Mustard ] wrote:

And that wouldn't be rude?

You’re right. Two wrongs don’t make a right. It’s best to keep quiet than fight. Hashem hates machlokes...

rising hero

Tue, Jan 07 2020, 6:02 pm

Im probably repeating what many have said already.
A waiting room is a public place and unless theyre talking quietly its considered a public conversation. I have chimed in to people's conversations, if I had something to add and I was never snobbed. I assume I said something like "I couldn't help overhearing" or "I hope you dont mind me saying". And then they would continue to include me or they would say thanks and continue their conversation...
Op, Im sorry that you happened to have been sitting near women with attitudes. You didnt do anything wrong.