Not complaining but Chanukah is hard!

amother

OP ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:42 pm

For the kids and adults! Kids are off schedule for a week, parties end at 11-12 + traveling so kids and adults don't get to sleep till 2 then there's work and school the next day and extra cranky kids. Parents and grandparents are hurt if you don't show so you better be there even if no one wants to go because hey it's for the kids!
I'm thankful for family and for parties but I feel like this is the other extreme with a party almost every night.
Right now I'm just a total and complete zombie!!
Anyone else?

shabbatiscoming ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:45 pm

So dont leave that late. Stay for a bit but leave earlier than midnight?
Here in the school system my child is in,there is no school on chanukah and we still left any paties well before that.
Coukd you try that next year?
Can you skip some of the parties?

amother

↑ OP

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:47 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Can't skip any just because...

The party starts at 8:30/9:00 and then you wait till the end for the presents/gelt

Bnei Berak 10 ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:53 pm

amother OP wrote:

Can't skip any just because...

The party starts at 8:30/9:00 and then you wait till the end for the presents/gelt

It starts way way too late!! Schedule definitely need to be adjusted. To be out partying every night while keeping a regular work schedule and kids is NOT what's Chanuka should be about.

amother

Leaf

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:54 pm

Why is a party that is for the kids starting after their bedtime? 830/9 is very late I would show up at 6 say happy Chanukah stay a bit and leave it’s ridiculous to come home at 11or 12

↑ shabbatiscoming ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:56 pm

amother OP wrote:

Can't skip any just because...

The party starts at 8:30/9:00 and then you wait till the end for the presents/gelt

Wow, why such a late start? Ours started 6 or 7. We left by 10ish.

amother

Green ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:56 pm

amother OP wrote:

Can't skip any just because...

The party starts at 8:30/9:00 and then you wait till the end for the presents/gelt

We started skipping grandparents parties, especially those that we need to travel for. It's just unsustainable, doesn't make sense being this off schedule the entire chanuka.

amother

↑ Green ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 2:57 pm

amother Leaf wrote:

Why is a party that is for the kids starting after their bedtime? 830/9 is very late I would show up at 6 say happy Chanukah stay a bit and leave it’s ridiculous to come home at 11or 12

If men get home from work at 6, they need to light & if there's travel time, by the time they'd leave it's already at least 7.

↑ Bnei Berak 10

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 3:02 pm

amother Green wrote:

If men get home from work at 6, they need to light & if there's travel time, by the time they'd leave it's already at least 7.

Crazy if you have young kids.

amother

Buttercup

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 3:11 pm

Well, I’m in Israel and my son is on break for a few few days. But most parties start pretty early and then pretty early around here. Maybe candlelighting here as earlier? Don’t think that we could keep those late nights if we had to get up the next morning.

amother

↑ Green ↓

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 3:12 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Crazy if you have young kids.

Right, that's why we started skipping grandparents/extended family parties & go to just our parents.

water_bear88

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 3:20 pm

amother Buttercup wrote:

I think even in secular workplaces here, it's relatively acceptable to leave early to light with your family. Certainly with jobs that allow part-time WFH.

amother

Brown

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 3:37 pm

Every night? You must have a lot of family! Yeah I would not be a happy camper. This year we took it easy. Hosted some things in our house so we were more in control, and the kids went to sleep at 10:30 the latest. With school starting later and the girls being off some days and the boys being sick some days it all worked out.
Other years Dh would have fomo but this year he was happy to go party with his friends after the kids went to sleep.

↑ shabbatiscoming

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 5:57 pm

amother Green wrote:

If men get home from work at 6, they need to light & if there's travel time, by the time they'd leave it's already at least 7.

We lit at the party with the whole family and then we got home we lit at home.

behappy2

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 6:38 pm

My husband's family was Motzei Shabbos and my family was Sunday by day and kids off for the weekend through Monday. I would never go to a party every night. That's just crazy.

amother

Daffodil

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 6:42 pm

I had 0 parties so can’t relate, but for me the hard part about Chanuka is the constant entertaining. Every day had to be something special, every dinner had to be fancy….. I had to be “on” all the time… I like Pesach or sukkos better because at least DH is home lunchtime so we can entertain the kids together.

amother

Jean

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 6:45 pm

amother Green wrote:

If men get home from work at 6, they need to light & if there's travel time, by the time they'd leave it's already at least 7.

Is it a thing that men get home at 6 across the board? Never heard of that.

amother

Taupe

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 6:51 pm

amother Jean wrote:

Is it a thing that men get home at 6 across the board? Never heard of that.

My husband works until 5:30 everyday with an hour commute.
That's fairly typical. So he comes home between 6:30-6:45.

amother

Winterberry

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 6:56 pm

I wouldn't be going if parties were that late.

amother

Blue

Wed, Jan 01 2025, 7:03 pm

amother Green wrote:

Right, that's why we started skipping grandparents/extended family parties & go to just our parents.

Same. 1 motzei shabbos & 1 midweek & that's it. I don't even tell my kids about other parties.

All of you saying to make earlier, well you need to come home from work, light (6pm earliest here), get the family out the door & drive. It's not possible to be too much earlier.