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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Giving Gifts
amother
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 Yesterday at 1:46 pm
I have two kids who play (and fight) together all the time. I feel like if I say I’m giving them specifically anything, it’ll end up being a battle between them “owning” it and therefore not wanting to share and the other kid being jealous and wanting a turn.
Another consideration is that I don’t have enough gifts to give individually , just a few things that both would enjoy.
Any insight from experienced moms?
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amother
DarkYellow
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Yesterday at 1:55 pm
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I had this debate this year. I wound up doing both. I got them a nice present to share and it comes with a million pieces so there’s no way one could use it all at once. For individual gifts, I got them each a $5 thing that they asked for (they’re preschoolers)
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mha3484
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Yesterday at 1:57 pm
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I have done this before but my kids wanted it. I have two boys with birthdays a week ish apart and they get a choice of two smaller individual gifts or one bigger pooled gift. Some years they pick getting their own and there are years they want the bigger. But I would not do it without giving them the choice first.
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amother
Powderblue
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Yesterday at 2:00 pm
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Depends what. A bucket of toys, a cd or a game is very sharable.
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amother
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Yesterday at 2:01 pm
Yes you definitely can.
Just let them know beforehand that you’ll be giving a shared gift instead of individual.
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amother
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Yesterday at 2:34 pm
Every year we do a family gift one night. just like every toy or book in the cupboard is a family toy.
some other nights they get a small individual item for a couple of dollars
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amother
Junglegreen
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Yesterday at 2:38 pm
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Is it something they could share easily or will it cause fights?
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#BestBubby
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Yesterday at 2:39 pm
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If it's something two can play at the same time.
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amother
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Yesterday at 2:59 pm
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For example I bought a plasma car. They can’t do it the same time but I also can’t buy two… so was hoping can give to both and they have to share it.
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amother
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Yesterday at 3:04 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | For example I bought a plasma car. They can’t do it the same time but I also can’t buy two… so was hoping can give to both and they have to share it. |
yes its a very big gift and great for them to learn to take turns, just be aware the first few weeks you will have to be setting turns and settling some arguments.
in this situation we usually set timers for 5-10 mins for each to have turns so its quick turnaround at the beginning, later on they wont need the supervision it will be natural.
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amother
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Yesterday at 3:19 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | For example I bought a plasma car. They can’t do it the same time but I also can’t buy two… so was hoping can give to both and they have to share it. |
For sure.
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amother
Seablue
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Yesterday at 3:33 pm
This year I’m doing both
One of my kids doesn’t share his stuff the other one does
So we need two sets of monopoly, etc
The funniest was when we needed to get two books of Labels for Lainey (it’s a book about sharing but older dc didn’t want to share 😅😭)
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