First you do a Chesed from your heart then slowly...

amother

OP ↓

Mon, Oct 21 2024, 4:47 pm

It becomes expected of you.

This is something that hit me from the other end of the coin.

As someone that is on the receiving end of a specific organization I am realizing that I suddenly have an expectation that they will get something done for me.

They never had to do this in the first place.

The person that started this organization has never been through the thing he's supporting but he's advocating for it just from the goodness of his heart.

And he's doing this day in day out. I see his status on WhatsApp. I see what he's busy with. Consistent chesed.
Unbelievable.

I just saw one of his posts and it hit me that he's caring for a totally under represented community and that if not him no one would care and no one would even know.

But somehow people think that he's gonna take care of it.
There's this subtle expectation and acceptance that this situation is taken care of or there's complete ignorance that this situation has nothing with me so I don't have to put my finger in cold water.

Here is a man that decides to put his fingers in cold water and works day and night for a population that everyone looks away from and suddenly there's this expectation that he will continue doing it.

Wow. I never thought about it this way.
I never realized that this is what happens.

amother

↑ OP

Mon, Oct 21 2024, 5:00 pm

amother Burlywood wrote:

This is why I don’t give to the same person more than 2-3 times. And why dh would rather give a “loan” that won’t be repaid, than free money.

I am not getting from this organization in a monetary way.
Wanted go clarify.

Also my point is that when someone puts themselves out there as an asken like this they are practically giving up part of themselves l'tovas hatzibur.

I have to say that I'm amazed that people do this.