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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 9:46 am
I thought it was really nice that BY of Baltimore sent us a letter for paying full tuition. Does your school do this?
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amother
Burlywood
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 10:00 am
I don’t know if I’d appreciate such a letter from my kids school. I’d likely view it as a fundraising ploy.
But it’s probably not, it is a nice gesture. But some including me might view it as such.
I guess what I’m saying is that you can never make everyone happy
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Molly Weasley
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 12:54 pm
amother Burlywood wrote: | I don’t know if I’d appreciate such a letter from my kids school. I’d likely view it as a fundraising ploy.
But it’s probably not, it is a nice gesture. But some including me might view it as such.
I guess what I’m saying is that you can never make everyone happy |
LOL. damned if you do, damned if you don't
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amother
Geranium
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 12:59 pm
I wish my schools would send me a letter or acknowledgement for paying the PARTIAL tuition that I am paying every month.
Full tuition is 10k per child, totalling 50k. We earn 100k. We pay 34k.
I wish we got acknowledgement for paying 34% of our pretax income to tuition. I wish there was an understanding of how much we're sacrificing if our blood, sweat, tears for this amount.
A family who earns 200k only pays 25% of their income. A family who earns 500k pays 10% of their income.
Yet, they get thank you, and we get letters and calls telling us to "prioritize" tuition more.
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amother
Obsidian
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 1:43 pm
My boys school sent a thank you letter at the end of last yr thanking us for paying on time and being up to date!! Bh
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 1:49 pm
It actually hurts my feelings a lot.
I kill myself to pay partial tuition. The percentage I pay of my salary is so much higher than the wealthy people. Someone like me who is paying 7 or 8 k per child is paying at least half my monthly income towards tuition or even more.
Where's my thank you letter? I guess it's just like everything else in life. The rich get the honor and recognition and the working poor just get looked down on.
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 1:51 pm
Also, I assume it's a new thing based off the kosher money podcast where Bnos sends these letters and bais yaakov is copying.
I wish both schools would stop. It's not nice and does more harm than good.
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mha3484
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 2:00 pm
A lot of things about that kosher money podcast rubbed me the wrong way including that. If my kids school does it I wouldn't know since I don't pay full but they always give me the impression that what I do pay is appreciated. The tuition manager is the nicest most pleasant woman despite having the worst job in the school always leaves me feeling valued.
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 2:11 pm
amother Forestgreen wrote: | It actually hurts my feelings a lot.
I kill myself to pay partial tuition. The percentage I pay of my salary is so much higher than the wealthy people. Someone like me who is paying 7 or 8 k per child is paying at least half my monthly income towards tuition or even more.
Where's my thank you letter? I guess it's just like everything else in life. The rich get the honor and recognition and the working poor just get looked down on. |
I am sorry I didn't think about it this way. We are certainly not wealthy and a LARGE majority of our take home pay also goes to tuition.
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 2:28 pm
amother OP wrote: | I am sorry I didn't think about it this way. We are certainly not wealthy and a LARGE majority of our take home pay also goes to tuition. |
I think its beautiful that you prioritize tuition so much and I don't imply that everyone paying full is wealthy.
I just wish that this wasn't another instance where the wealthy people are getting appreciated and the people struggling were overlooked again. The wealthy who pay just tuition and don't donate are paying a drop in the bucket of what they can afford. The wealthy who donate get tons of thank yous and appreciation and don't need another letter of thanks. These letters are only really recognizing those who struggle to pay in full and do. And overlook the ones who pay way more than they can afford and still don't manage full tuition.
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 2:55 pm
I don’t get a thank you note but I do get a ‘tizku l’mitzvos’ which always strikes me as funny because I don’t consider it a mitzvah to pay tuition, it’s just my obligation
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 2:59 pm
amother Jade wrote: | I don’t get a thank you note but I do get a ‘tizzy l’mitzvos’ which always strikes me as funny because I don’t consider it a mitzvah to pay tuition, it’s just my obligation |
Lol it's a mitzvah to have guests, but we still say tizku l'mitzvos for it. We are commanded to keep shabbos, but we still get rewarded!
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 3:02 pm
amother Honeysuckle wrote: | Lol it's a mitzvah to have guests, but we still say tizku l'mitzvos for it. We are commanded to keep shabbos, but we still get rewarded! |
not sure these are comparable
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amother
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 3:05 pm
Guess not, but with many people thinking that tuition is optional, they have to make sure you know it's appreciated?
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amother
Gardenia
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 3:11 pm
I don’t pay full tuition but I think it’s nice that they send out that letter. I’m sure it is appreciated when parents are able to pay the full amount. I’m appreciative to them as well!
I don’t think it’s insulting to those of us who aren’t able to pay full.
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amother
Lightgreen
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 4:26 pm
One of my kids' schools thanked me for making my small tuition payments frequently without being reminded. (I am tens of thousands of dollars behind.) I asked them to not give me a scholarship, just to give me patience. They told me that they trust me to continue doing what I am doing.
I really appreciated that. IYH one day I'll finish paying them the full amount.
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amother
Waterlily
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 4:48 pm
amother Forestgreen wrote: | Also, I assume it's a new thing based off the kosher money podcast where Bnos sends these letters and bais yaakov is copying.
I wish both schools would stop. It's not nice and does more harm than good. |
I think BY always did it. If I'm remembering correctly I got a letter I think from BY unless it was from TA that said thank for you being part of the x% that pays full tuition. I felt like a sucker that I'm of the small percentage that pays full tuition. Now I don't lol. Not because of the letter but because I have more kids in the system and can't afford it anymore. I think a letter without the percentage would be better! And without the podcast and workout ppl advertising they got a letter, the ppl who get a break wouldn't feel slighted because they wouldn't even know about it.
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amother
Lotus
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Mon, Oct 21 2024, 7:19 pm
in theory it might be nice but as someone who pays full I can tell you my husband wishes we could get a scholarship and similar to previous poster, anything that reminds us that we are paying more per child then many might not be the best idea....
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Molly Weasley
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Tue, Oct 22 2024, 12:55 am
Those who can't pay full tuition should feel grateful that others do. The "rich" contributions help support the school, allowing everyone to continue their education, even if they aren’t covering their full share. It may sound harsh, but it’s the reality. Recognizing and appreciating those who pay full tuition is essential for keeping the school afloat
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