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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
amother
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 6:43 pm
If a poster asks for assistance or information that is a limited resource and other posters see your offer for OP to DM you, then they also do, what is the proper way to handle?
Share the information with both? Then OP may lose out.
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Einikel
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 6:44 pm
I would edit my post to make anon once op reached out.
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seeker
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 7:03 pm
I would give op time to respond first, and if there is more left afterwards or if OP declines or doesn't answer after maybe a week or so then I would go ahead with the next person.
Hard to say with the vague hypothetical though.
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amother
Mistyrose
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 7:17 pm
No, you offered it to OP. I often ignore unsolicited DMs. I don't owe anything to posters who DM me without me asking them to.
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amother
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 7:23 pm
Thanks
So OP reached out the same time as another poster.
I don't want to give too many details.
I guess next time I should just ignore the other poster.
But this should be a PSA to all - if you see a poster telling OP to DM her, don't assume it's for you as well.
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seeker
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 9:17 pm
amother OP wrote: | Thanks
So OP reached out the same time as another poster.
I don't want to give too many details.
I guess next time I should just ignore the other poster.
But this should be a PSA to all - if you see a poster telling OP to DM her, don't assume it's for you as well. |
I wouldn't assume but I would say "I'm not op but if the opportunity is still open after op gets what she needs, I'm also interested." Why not? If you don't ask, you'll never know.
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Success10
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 9:58 pm
I once posted that I had information that an OP needed and I told her to PM me and over the years a few people have read the thread and PMed me for the information and I’m very happy to give it to whoever needs.
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singleagain
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 10:14 pm
If you don't want to put yourself on a thread you can always ask a mod to exchange your two screen names. I'm always happy to be the go between. I've done it several weeks times and I promise I forget who I've "set up" about two seconds after ive done it
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Elfrida
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Sun, Dec 15 2024, 10:28 pm
Success10 wrote: | I once posted that I had information that an OP needed and I told her to PM me and over the years a few people have read the thread and PMed me for the information and I’m very happy to give it to whoever needs. |
Information isn't a finite resource in the way money is. If you tell one person that a certain shop sells a certain item (for example), you're not losing out by sharing the same information with twenty more people. On the other hand, you might not have money to give twenty more people.
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tweety1
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Mon, Dec 16 2024, 6:45 am
Success10 wrote: | I once posted that I had information that an OP needed and I told her to PM me and over the years a few people have read the thread and PMed me for the information and I’m very happy to give it to whoever needs. |
Same here exactly. I don't quite see what the problem is.
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amother
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Mon, Dec 16 2024, 7:50 am
Information isn't the same.
It was specifically regarding a resource which I know to be limited.
I will just tell the other person I'm sorry I can't share at this time
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Molly Weasley
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Mon, Dec 16 2024, 7:56 am
amother Mistyrose wrote: | No, you offered it to OP. I often ignore unsolicited DMs. I don't owe anything to posters who DM me without me asking them to. |
Um
If you can help someone, why wouldn't you?
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singleagain
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Mon, Dec 16 2024, 7:57 am
amother OP wrote: | Information isn't the same.
It was specifically regarding a resource which I know to be limited.
I will just tell the other person I'm sorry I can't share at this time |
Plus if you can go back and edit your info / offer out of the original post.
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amother
Sunflower
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Mon, Dec 16 2024, 8:00 am
amother Mistyrose wrote: | No, you offered it to OP. I often ignore unsolicited DMs. I don't owe anything to posters who DM me without me asking them to. |
A DM is like a text message, no one needs to ask permission before messaging you.
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