What Was This Mother Thinking? Baby Not Dressed For Weather!

amother

Offwhite

Yesterday at 8:55 pm

Please, just don't judge. If the child is not in physical danger (being outside 25 degrees for 5 minutes is very uncomfortable but not actually dangerous), just don't judge. It was awesome you offered to help, but to give musar to another mom is not okay.

amother

Poppy ↓

Yesterday at 8:58 pm

You ask what was this mom thinking. I ask what were you thinking?

Who are you to judge?

Were you ever a mom?

Ever had a baby with a blowout?

Ever had a baby who tantrumed so much you just ran out of the house with them?

amother

Butterscotch

Yesterday at 9:10 pm

One of my kids was a screamer.
I’m 99% sure it was a sensory thing but they have thankfully since grown out of it.

He was only ever happy if I was holding him, in a wrap, or naked in the bath. Literally. The worst.

More than once I just threw whatever I had on and ran out with him. He never wore coats or sweaters (even as a baby) he did love his fluffy blanket in his car seat tho.

I received many many comments from “well meaning” people. Some were nicer than others but at the end of the day I usually ignored them because holding him for 3 mins to unload the cart into the car and then strap him into the seat was 3 mins less crying. Even if it was cold. It wasn’t long. It was what it was.

And yes this went on until he was about 2.5 /3 when he started allowing me to dress him in more than a specific 2 tshirts and shorts. Yes shorts often even in the winter. As a mom it hurt but my pediatrician told me that as long as he’s not in any extreme temperature for too long and I see his lips aren’t blue I should do what I have to do to minimize his pain/crying.

Thank GOD he grew out of it. These days he’ll wear anything as long as I cut the tags out.

amother

Kiwi

Yesterday at 9:13 pm

I would never ever ever put my baby in the car first. Maybe depends where you live but that is way too scary to leave a baby far from you in the car especially if you’re going to remove your cart.

It does sound too cold for the baby but it could be that she’s a first time mom and still trying to figure out the whole keeping a baby warm going for place to place. Putting a baby in a coat in a car seat is EXTREMELY dangerous. So she would’ve put her baby in a coat. Put the things in the car and then taken off the coat and put the baby in the car seat. And yes I do that many times but when it’s quick I’ll just throw a blanket over my baby from the quick walk from the store to the car to buckle them in.

amother

Brunette ↓

Yesterday at 9:13 pm

It’s not so bad. I think you are overreacting. Some people don’t bundle up their children for a car ride. The car is warm and the jackets cause problems with the seatbelts. The mother probably took the baby out for a few minutes to run back and forth to the grocery and load up the car. Going out in the cold for short amounts of time is not just okay, but it’s actually healthy especially for children. Look up what children in Finland do. They are some of the healthiest children around. A little bit of cold weather is nothing to fear. If the baby wasn’t red or crying or seemed like she or he was suffering, she was just fine.

amother

Fern ↓

Yesterday at 9:15 pm

amother Fuchsia wrote:

20 degrees is not extremely cold. Cold yes, but not going to cause damage within a reasonable time frame (less than an hour).

Regarding the jacket, she’s probably careful about car seat safety. My kids only wear fleeces in the car, regardless of temperature. Pants or lack thereof, maybe the baby had a blowout or the pants just bunched up.

20 degrees is extremely cold. It is quite literally below freezing temperature. Definitely not barefoot weather.

amother

Mintgreen

Yesterday at 9:17 pm

amother Kiwi wrote:

She could have put the baby in first and the loaded the groceries so baby isn’t out in the cold.

amother

↑ Poppy ↓

Yesterday at 9:21 pm

amother Mintgreen wrote:

She could have put the baby in first and the loaded the groceries so baby isn’t out in the cold.

Did you never have a baby who screams in the car seat? Baby isn’t screaming when mom is holding him. If he was uncomfortable in the cold he would’ve been screaming.

↑ chestnut

Yesterday at 9:23 pm

Ema of 5 wrote:

Who said I’m proud? I’m just pointing out that literally a few minutes in cold weather is not dangerous. He actually ran outside before anyone realized what was going on. I let him stay out for a minute or two, and then brought him back in. Nothing to boast about, just sayin what happened.

When you said it initially, it was together with other stuff you see nothing wrong with. I'm glad you were just stating what happened and it wasn't intentional, although letting him "stay out for a minute or two" is overboard as well in my book.

amother

↑ Brunette

Yesterday at 9:25 pm

amother Fern wrote:

20 degrees is extremely cold. It is quite literally below freezing temperature. Definitely not barefoot weather.

What will happen if you go out barefoot and walk around for a few minutes (or even more)? Absolutely nothing will happen. I’ve done it. It’s good for you.

↑ Ema of 5 ↓

Yesterday at 9:57 pm

chestnut wrote:

But the beauty is that you don’t need to agree with everything I do. You are free to judge me in your head all you want.

amother

Purple

Yesterday at 10:01 pm

OP maybe this baby is an extreme sweater and overheats very quickly? One of my kids when he was a baby would always sweat profusely, especially in his infant seat. Also I don’t put on coats in the car when kids are in infant or car seats as it’s not safe to be buckled in with a coat.
(I once had outdoor dinner reservations and it was hot outside my baby started sweating so I slowly started undressing him, I ended up stripping him to his undershirt which he also soaked through and kept begging the restaurant to give us a table inside. The restaurant simply ignored us although he was not even 3 months old and we had no choice but to leave in middle. It was way too dangerous for him and we were also super uncomfortable and sweaty)

amother

↑ cornflower

Yesterday at 10:07 pm

amother Candycane wrote:

That’s just not normal parenting. I’ll bet the teacher was horrified. I’m sure cps would be horrified too.

Not normal parenting for you I suppose.
Maybe you would rather force your kid to wear a coat. Bribe them whatever works for you. I do what works for me. Nowhere do I agree that its normal to let a 5 yr old go without a coat. It's just how I'm dealing this situaution based on this childs needs.
Welcome to the world were we all parent diffrently.

↑ Cheiny ↓

Yesterday at 10:25 pm

amother NeonGreen wrote:

Maybe they had a diaper blow out in the car and that's all she had on her to change baby into.

So then she should’ve gone home rather than go on a shopping trip and keep the baby outside for all that time, not properly dressed…no?

amother

↑ Poppy

Yesterday at 10:31 pm

Cheiny wrote:

So then she should’ve gone home rather than go on a shopping trip and keep the baby outside for all that time, not properly dressed…no?

We can never “should’ve” a mother of an infant. Or any mother or any parent. We have zero idea their cheshbonos.

Maybe she was losing it and needed to get out?
Maybe DH is abusive and she needed to leave for a bit.

Maybe she had a fight with DH and didn’t want to be around.

Maybe she comes from a country where it’s much colder and she thought this was warm 😀

↑ Cheiny ↓

Yesterday at 10:31 pm

amother Fuchsia wrote:

I guess I should’ve expected all the justifications… but if you had seen what I saw, you’d know none of the above were likely or even possible.

And even if the child had removed every piece of clothing, and opened her jacket, or had a diaper blowout, it would still be beyond irresponsible to take the child out for a long shopping trip and keep the unclothed baby outside for that long while she talked on the phone and leisurely loaded the many bags into the car… everything I saw was just wrong.

As far as your claim that 20 degree weather isn’t cold, I’d challenge you to stand outside with no gloves on for 10 minutes and then picture the baby with no gloves, nothing on their legs or feet, and an open jacket, and then let us know if you maintain your position.

As I said, my hands were freezing through my gloves… that poor child..

↑ Cheiny

Yesterday at 10:36 pm

Ema of 5 wrote:

Maybe it happened in the store.

What happened in the store? All the clothes came off? Highly doubtful… but Again, even if that was so, then why was she leisurely keeping the baby outside for so long while she loaded the bags?
All these scenarios didn’t seem to be the case at all…

amother

↑ Fuchsia ↓

Yesterday at 10:41 pm

amother Fern wrote:

20 degrees is extremely cold. It is quite literally below freezing temperature. Definitely not barefoot weather.

I mean, if you live in Florida 40 degrees is extremely cold. It’s all relative. But as someone who lives somewhere that’s routinely below zero Fahrenheit and has seen wind chills in the -50s F, I can assure you, being outside in 20 degree weather for 5-10 minutes is in no way dangerous. Is it uncomfortable? Sure. But the child would have been just fine when she got into the car with a heater and a warm blanket.