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Forum -> Relationships -> Giving Gifts
If sil didn't give me a baby gift should I get for her?



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amother
OP  


 

Post Today at 11:16 am
I have a wonderful sil who just had a baby. I had a baby a month ago and she was a huge help toward the end of my pregnancy and also offered coverage for my other kids (which we ended up not needed to use). She didn't get me a baby gift which is perfectly fine.

I want to get her a baby gift, but don't want her to feel bad she didn't get me, like my gift is a pointed way of saying "Where's my gift?"

What do you think?
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 11:21 am
Give her a gift!
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amother
Celeste


 

Post Today at 11:24 am
For sure get her something and if she mentions anything say that you’re so grateful for all her help (so it’s even)
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amother
DarkRed


 

Post Today at 11:25 am
Maybe your gift can be more of a thank you for helping me?

I have a different scenario. I have a sil who I always got gifts for but she never ever ever got me gifts. She just had a baby and I would love to give a gift but I'm a pushover type, so I'm not sure if I'm allowing myself To be stepped onto yet again or not.
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amother
  OP


 

Post Today at 11:25 am
amother Celeste wrote:
For sure get her something and if she mentions anything say that you’re so grateful for all her help (so it’s even)


Thanks good idea!
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AlwaysCleaning




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 11:37 am
Give her the gift and in the note write a thank you for all her help
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lucky14




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 11:54 am
For sure give her a gift!
Her gift to you was her help. 🙂
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amother
Tan


 

Post Today at 12:00 pm
Are you helping her as well?
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Today at 12:01 pm
Rule #1 for a happy life

We don't give to get

That's not true giving
Mazel tov to both
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kenz




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 12:12 pm
This is such a nice predicament. Mazel tov, hope you are always this close and caring with each other.
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amother
Petunia


 

Post Today at 12:15 pm
I feel like if u write thanx for all ur help, that’s just pointing out to her that u had a baby also and she didn’t give u an actual gift
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blima1




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 12:16 pm
I would say something like: I know I didn't need to get you a gift, but I just saw this and it was too cute to resist!
I wouldn't make a big deal about it
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amother
Quince


 

Post Today at 12:18 pm
amother Cyan wrote:
Rule #1 for a happy life

We don't give to get

That's not true giving
Mazel tov to both


But this has nothing to do with OPs question. She wants to get her a gift, she just doesn’t want her SIL to then feel guilty that she didn’t buy OP a gift as well. It’s about the SILs feelings, not OPs
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Raizle




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 12:28 pm
blima1 wrote:
I would say something like: I know I didn't need to get you a gift, but I just saw this and it was too cute to resist!
I wouldn't make a big deal about it


I wouldn't write that.
If she said "you didn't have to" then OP can respond that but I wouldn't preempt it
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amother
Dahlia


 

Post Today at 12:33 pm
amother OP wrote:
I have a wonderful sil who just had a baby. I had a baby a month ago and she was a huge help toward the end of my pregnancy and also offered coverage for my other kids (which we ended up not needed to use). She didn't get me a baby gift which is perfectly fine.

I want to get her a baby gift, but don't want her to feel bad she didn't get me, like my gift is a pointed way of saying "Where's my gift?"

What do you think?


Definitely give her a gift! Sounds like you have a great relationship with her, and in these types of relationships, things don't need to be 'tit for tat'. Sometimes you give, sometimes you get, at times she helps u, at other times you help her. Mazel tov!
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amother
Slategray  


 

Post Today at 12:48 pm
It’s only been a month. Maybe she was waiting for Black Friday deals or something to buy a gift for you:). Has she given in the past for any occasion?
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imaima




 
 
    
 

Post Today at 12:52 pm
amother OP wrote:
I have a wonderful sil who just had a baby. I had a baby a month ago and she was a huge help toward the end of my pregnancy and also offered coverage for my other kids (which we ended up not needed to use). She didn't get me a baby gift which is perfectly fine.

I want to get her a baby gift, but don't want her to feel bad she didn't get me, like my gift is a pointed way of saying "Where's my gift?"

What do you think?


Get her a gift and if she feels bad she will get you one too.
Your baby is still young enough.
Not everyone gets to buying gifts right after the birth of other people’s babies
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amother
  Slategray


 

Post Today at 12:53 pm
imaima wrote:
Get her a gift and if she feels bad she will get you one too.
Your baby is still young enough.
Not everyone gets to buying gifts right after the birth of other people’s babies

This. If it’s been a year I get it. But a month is so little and she could totally still be planning on getting something. Not everyone gets around to gifting right away or like I said above maybe she was waiting for a sale or something
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