Do you buy baby gifts for your sister in laws?

amother

OP ↓

Wed, Nov 13 2024, 11:28 pm

I was discussing buying baby gifts for my sister-in-laws that are pregnant and people were telling me "wow that's so nice"

I was really shocked by that reaction because I just thought it's a given that you would get your sister-in-laws baby gifts.

But a lot of people told me that no, it's not a given. Am I crazy for thinking that that's sad?

For more reference - I haven't had kids yet and my husband has many siblings but I still feel responsible to buy even just a small cheap gift. I'm not talking anything fancy. $10-$30

amother

Bergamot

Wed, Nov 13 2024, 11:39 pm

Yes I always buy something small even if it’s a paci clip and newborn beanie from aliexpress for $3. Which btw the frum layette stores sell. I wrap it nicely and my sils love it. By their first kid I got a fuzzy blanket but bh they have babies every year so I can’t afford to do that. Or if one of the Jewish stores goes on sale I’ll buy a few sets, like under $20.

amother

Red

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:11 am

Honestly, between my husbands 12 siblings and they each have 12-14 kids, I would forever be buying gifts. These things add up. We got by the first and that’s it.
The same with making Sheba berachos. So much politics goes into it. That we just stopped.

amother

Zinnia

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:18 am

Add another option of ‘only for their first baby’
I can’t afford to buy for every baby but when they have their first I try to get something.

WhatFor ↓

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:30 am

What do you mean for your sister-in-law? This question is phrased funny for me, what am I missing?

If I buy a baby gift, it's for my niece/nephew. Or if we're saying that a gift is technically for the parents, then it's from me and DH either for my brother and his wife or for DH's sister and her DH. Either way, it's for one of our siblings and their spouse/child.

I find this idea that it's only for the mother to be strange. Unless you specifically mean buying her a massage or a spa treatment, or something for her. And in that case, no. We don't specifically do that although I guess it would be nice.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:33 am

amother Red wrote:

My husband has 10 siblings and they kh have a lot of kids but I couldn't imagine not buying even a small gift for each.

Family is so important

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:34 am

WhatFor wrote:

Ok ok I hear the logic but I think we all understood what I meant

agreer

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:34 am

WhatFor wrote:

it means for your sister in law's baby. It's a present for the baby, not the mom.

amother

DarkYellow

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 12:39 am

Also from a large family here and what we do know is have a family fund and we give $100 to a baby store from all the siblings for every baby so they can get 3 nicer stretches, always nice to get some new things no matter what number baby

amother

↑ OP

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 9:03 am

amother DarkYellow wrote:

That's so smart and honestly wouldn't cost much for my family.

Maybe I will suggest it but not sure how open they would be to the idea.

As far as I know most of my husband's siblings don't buy baby gifts for each other and I was super baffled when I found that out.

amother

Coral

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 9:44 am

For their first baby, or a bar /bas mitzvah or wedding that’s all otherwise we’d be in debt

amother

Hyssop

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 10:27 am

For a first yes. My husband comes from a large family and his siblings also have large families knh. Once it's not a first baby or first of a gender, we all chip in and order a nice brunch to be delivered to her. It was such a a nice feeling to be pampered and nourished with a gourmet brunch that I would never treat myself to. It was so generous that it lasted me all day. My babies didn't take pacis, get dressed up, or need another footie, so gift items weren't really useful after my first.

amother

Snow

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 10:46 am

By each of my siblings and sils I give a baby gift up to $100. Whenever I have a baby, I usually get the same. For me family is imp and since I don’t see them very often, I feel like it’s very meaningful.

goodvibes

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 10:48 am

I always buy a gift if we attend their simcha or visit the baby. Otherwise it usually doesn’t happen.

momma 17

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 10:56 am

My husband and I each have 3 married siblings.
We are both the oldest.
When our first niece was was born we went all out and bought a bunch of stuff.
We bh have 13 nieces and nephews now.
For the last few I bought embroidered bath towels that cost around 50$.
Sometimes I will chip in with another sibling.

amother

Skyblue

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 11:05 am

Yes I always buy a gift even if they live overseas. Price is dependent on the relationship and if I have something at home that I got on sale etc.
Same with friends.

I don’t always get back though, which I’m ok with.

I am naturally a gift giver and also love receiving gifts. If I’d have all the money I’d be buying gifts constantly for everyone. I’ve bought for Chai Lifeline etc. in the past and hope to be able to again.

essie14

Thu, Nov 14 2024, 11:25 am

My husband and I both come from small families. We buy gifts for all major occasions - weddings, babies, etc.