How much is the norm to give for collectors POLL:

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 8:08 pm

Thanx all! Was discussing it & someone said that giving less then $10 is stingy & weird, and I was starting to feel stupid...
I think $5 is a nice amount, $10 is generous.

effess

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 9:47 pm

We can’t afford large donations for each collector. So we give a little something like $5 and offer a warm drink.

The rich ppl I know have a sign hanging on their door with hours or days they accept collectors.

I bless all of you to have enough to be as generous as you want!!

amother

Cyan ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 9:50 pm

I don't think there's a norm. Huge range. Definitely in different cities/neighborhoods. Where I live I get a few knocks a week minimum, sometimes more than once a day. I haven't a dime to spare. But I try not to ignore or turn anyone away. I once asked my father (not a rav but pretty learned) who told me it's brought down that it's better to give less to whoever asks than giving more less often, as that turns you into a giver. I usually give $2, which honestly adds up a lot considering the amount of knocks on my door. Here and there if I'm able or I'm especially touched by the story I'll give 5, and rarely, more.

amother

↑ Cyan ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 9:53 pm

amother OP wrote:

I think $5 is a nice amount, $10 is generous.

I agree.
Then again, if you were very wealthy, I would think that was pretty cheap.
That's why I say there's no norm. Do what you can.

amother

DarkKhaki

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 9:59 pm

Now I get almost never so I can give more. But there was times we got frequent knocks and I couldn't give everybody.

I learned never to turn someone away with nothing. So I always try to give something. If I can give a dollar I do. If I can't, I apologize and I try to offer them a water bottle or a can of soda or an apple. (Many are grateful, they can be out collecting for hours without anything to eat or drink. And those that are mad, I did what I felt was right.)

amother

↑ Cyan ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 10:15 pm

Rappel wrote:

I give food, and brachot. If they object, then that tells me all I need to know

What exactly does it tell you? That they're desperate enough to be knocking on doors for money? Nobody does that for fun. I'm not talking about if they scream or yell at you for not giving, but objecting? You have no obligation to give, but "that tells me all I need to know" sounds very judgemental.

scintilla ↓

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 11:11 pm

We are very tight so I give $1 from the dollar bills I keep on hand to tip delivery guys, and I offer them a water bottle as well. They are always grateful even before I offer the water bottle, I've never had anyone get upset bh. I do live in a building so I wonder if that tempers expectations, like they know that if someone lives in this kind of place they're not exactly rolling in it! But they come anyhow at least a few times a week and I am always happy to give what I can.

amother

Mintgreen

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 11:42 pm

justforfun87 wrote:

I just gave $20 the other day and now another two showed up and gave them the same but I definitely can't keep that up. Not use to them knocking.

You might just be put onto a list now that you give $20 and more people will show up at your door.

I usually give $1 if it’s someone who looks really chashuv I’ll give more depending on my mood. When we’ve recognized people at the door or my husband did in Shul I make sure they get at least a $100. (My husband met a cousin of mine from EY in Shul and I made him go back to give him more).

amother

↑ OP

Mon, Nov 11 2024, 11:54 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

I dont give anything. We give tzedaka to a few different 0laces. Not random men that mightcome to our door.
I also almost never have cash at home anymore.

My heart goes out to the men and women that need to be out for hours on end, in all weather's, collecting money. I always offer snack & drink as well, if I don't have cash at the moment, they at least get some food & drink.

amother

↑ Cyan ↓

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 12:15 am

amother OP wrote:

My heart goes out to the men and women that need to be out for hours on end, in all weather, collecting money. I always offer snack & drink as well, if I don't have cash at the moment, they at least get some food & drink.

I am very close to someone in Israel whose husband has come to the U.S. to collect. Since I met her, each knock at the door I picture that wife left at home waiting (with no money), her humiliation knowing what her husband is doing every day, and of course the men themselves, the difficulty of collecting for whatever their need is, often basic food, the hardship they have to go thru for that. I wish I could give more, but at least thinking of the real people they are helps me to give as much as I can and almost always answer the door, so it's one less unanswered door for them. I also started keeping water bottles in the fridge to offer.

amother

↑ Cyan ↓

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 12:19 am

Btw about not having cash, I don't know about other places, but I'm seeing that in Lakewood many of the men come with credit card machines, I'm assuming lent to them by Tomchei Tzedakah or something like that. I personally don't like to use that, I feel stupid if I'm just giving a few dollars. But I do think it's smart knowing that many people don't have cash on them

amother

↑ Cyan ↓

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 12:25 am

amother Coffee wrote:

We don't open the door.
We give $1-$2, to the neighborhood kids who come to collect for their schools.

Why do you give to kids collecting for their schools but not men collecting for their families?

amother

Navyblue

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 12:40 am

Unfortunately I learnt my lesson the hard way.
My husband won't keep maaser money in the house overnight if someone asks for it.
So one day, this guy knocked and asked and it was 11pm and he had $140 maaser money so he gave it to him. Since then, he hounds us once a month, won't accept a smaller donation, insists on coming in and sitting down and talking for half an hour. We don't have more to give him so he's always disappointed.
This has been going on monthly for 6 years!
Now, I never give more than $2.

Apart from the one time when an old man knocked on on in a freezing winter day and very embarrassed said he couldn't pay his electricity bill and they cut off the electricity and his wife was freezing cold and couldn't cook so they were sitting in the cold and dark without even a hot drink. I asked him for the bill, paid it for him plus more for the next month, phoned the electricity company and made sure they were switching it back on and gave him cooked food to take home. I don't regret that one. I wonder what he did after that.

amother

Buttercup

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 12:50 am

amother Seablue wrote:

I give $18 bc I’m embarrassed to give less—my parents were wealthy growing up and wrote big checks. But we’re poor. My husband gives less. Our rav says we’re not even Chayav maaiser.

You really don't need to. In fact, you shouldn't.

Iymnok

Tue, Nov 12 2024, 4:00 am

My father gave $5 at the door and $1 in shul.
I know because he would often ask me for my small bills.
My parents were frugal, and we're paying our tuitions. There wasn't much available for collectors.

We give to the local kupa regularly. At the door it's either the agurot on my wallet or a shekel or two.