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I can’t call you mommy- Ami serial
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amother
Royalblue  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:12 pm
Did anyone find it weird how the mom is so over involved in her married daughter's life? She sent her home and went to receive her daughter's diagnosis herself? Also the daughter's husband is barely mentioned.
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salsa




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:17 pm
This week's installment mentioned that the cancer was probably caused by a procedure she had as a baby. I don't remember details about the procedure, can anyone enlighten?
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amother
  Mustard


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:17 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Did anyone find it weird how the mom is so over involved in her married daughter's life? She sent her home and went to receive her daughter's diagnosis herself? Also the daughter's husband is barely mentioned.


It's a community culture. In KJ it's common for parents to be overly involved in the young couples life. They get married so young.
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amother
Catmint  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:26 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Did anyone find it weird how the mom is so over involved in her married daughter's life? She sent her home and went to receive her daughter's diagnosis herself? Also the daughter's husband is barely mentioned.
I didn't think it was over involved, rather she was afraid how her daughter would accept the news so she wanted to hear it first and give it over more gently.
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amother
  Ghostwhite  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:35 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Did anyone find it weird how the mom is so over involved in her married daughter's life? She sent her home and went to receive her daughter's diagnosis herself? Also the daughter's husband is barely mentioned.

How can anyone even pass judgment on this mother!!!!!!
After all she has gone through, you find judgment in the fact that she is gentle with her daughter?? A child who also suffered from day one??
How can one be so heartless!!
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amother
  Ghostwhite  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:37 pm
amother Mustard wrote:
It's a community culture. In KJ it's common for parents to be overly involved in the young couples life. They get married so young.

This is a unique case. With so much pain from the very beginning. Don't be so quick to generalize ... and blame the kj culture.
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amother
  Royalblue  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:38 pm
amother Ghostwhite wrote:
How can anyone even pass judgment on this mother!!!!!!
After all she has gone through, you find judgment in the fact that she is gentle with her daughter?? A child who also suffered from day one??
How can one be so heartless!!

Woah. Did I trigger you?
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amother
  Ghostwhite  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:45 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Woah. Did I trigger you?

Trigger? Why trigger?
I just can't understand how one can find judgment in such a pathetic situation.
All I have is intense compassion for her.
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amother
  NeonOrange  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 10:56 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Did anyone find it weird how the mom is so over involved in her married daughter's life? She sent her home and went to receive her daughter's diagnosis herself? Also the daughter's husband is barely mentioned.


She's not over involved at all, considering the situation.
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amother
  Royalblue  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 11:13 pm
amother Ghostwhite wrote:
Trigger? Why trigger?
I just can't understand how one can find judgment in such a pathetic situation.
All I have is intense compassion for her.

Because you were screaming. I didn't grow up with a mother. I never know when it's the norm and when it seams to much when I hear stories. This seemed like a lot. But your reaction was over the top.
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amother
  Ghostwhite  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 11:15 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Because you were screaming. I didn't grow up with a mother. I never know when it's the norm and when it seams to much when I hear stories. This seemed like a lot. But your reaction was over the top.

I'm sorry .
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amother
  Peony


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 11:48 pm
amother Royalblue wrote:
Did anyone find it weird how the mom is so over involved in her married daughter's life? She sent her home and went to receive her daughter's diagnosis herself? Also the daughter's husband is barely mentioned.


It's very difficult for a author writing a second hand biography to genuinely relay a lifestyle.

For those of us living with Chana and l"hbcl Simi, the question would've been greater hasn't Chana joined Simi at appointments.

This was a very unique situation, it is remarkable that Simi got married and mothered a child. Chana was her back bone.
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amother
  Catmint


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 11:53 pm
amother Ghostwhite wrote:
This is a unique case. With so much pain from the very beginning. Don't be so quick to generalize ... and blame the kj culture.
Can someone please summarize the beginning? I don't buy it every week.
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amother
  Myrtle  


 

Post Sat, Nov 09 2024, 11:59 pm
Listen- I don’t know them or live near them but since they are real people and it’s not a novel, we shouldn’t be taking them apart.
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amother
  Royalblue  


 

Post Sun, Nov 10 2024, 10:29 am
amother Myrtle wrote:
Listen- I don’t know them or live near them but since they are real people and it’s not a novel, we shouldn’t be taking them apart.

She did choose to publicize her story in magazine.
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amother
Plum  


 

Post Sun, Nov 10 2024, 10:36 am
rikkik wrote:
mother was leaving the children alone at all hours of the night to go out with her friends. still doesn't justify cutting her completely out of their lives


This is the part I don't get. I get that there was dysfunction and the kids needed removing, but the father seems to be the hero. Usually if a parent cuts of the other parent it comes back to bite him.

Although there doesn't seem to be any maliciousness of control on the father's part, but still. Or could just be because back then alienation wasn't a thing so it was taken at face value and wasn't questioned, even when the kids became adults.
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amother
  Myrtle  


 

Post Sun, Nov 10 2024, 10:47 am
Maybe at the end of the story, people can send in their questions to be answered?
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amother
  Myrtle  


 

Post Sun, Nov 10 2024, 10:50 am
amother Royalblue wrote:
She did choose to publicize her story in magazine.


Sure but it was with the intention that she should be admired not criticized.
This is not the bungalow colony story that was fiction. There are real people with feelings behind this true life story.
Again, I don’t know them and I’m not part of their community. I’m just innocently pointing this out.

We all have a story to tell.
My life would make an interesting book and if I would be brave enough to have it written about, I wouldn’t want to hear people’s criticism when they don’t know everything.
You have to realize that there’s no anonymity here -so there are certain things the author just can’t share.
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amother
  NeonOrange  


 

Post Sun, Nov 10 2024, 10:53 am
amother Plum wrote:
This is the part I don't get. I get that there was dysfunction and the kids needed removing, but the father seems to be the hero. Usually if a parent cuts of the other parent it comes back to bite him.

Although there doesn't seem to be any maliciousness of control on the father's part, but still. Or could just be because back then alienation wasn't a thing so it was taken at face value and wasn't questioned, even when the kids became adults.


The mother was/is mentally unstable. It's not about alimentation. The father always allowed the kids to talk to the mother, the mother wasn't interested in that. (Afaik)
(She's obviously not writing all details of her life circumstances....)
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amother
  Ghostwhite  


 

Post Sun, Nov 10 2024, 10:54 am
amother Myrtle wrote:
Sure but it was with the intention that she should be admired not criticized.
This is not the bungalow colony story that was fiction. There are real people with feelings behind this true life story.
Again, I don’t know them and I’m not part of their community. I’m just innocently pointing this out.

We all have a story to tell.
My life would make an interesting book and if I would be brave enough to have it written about, I wouldn’t want to hear people’s criticism when they don’t know everything.
You have to realize that there’s no anonymity here -so there are certain things the author just can’t share.

You are so right.
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