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Forum
-> Working Women
amother
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Yesterday at 10:11 am
I'm due in a couple of months.
Worked for close to 20 years. I'm feeling done with the running out every morning. The babysitter-hassle-finding the right one, dealing with their cancellations, running to drop off baby, the bottles/pumping. Running home for the buses. The constant rushing.
The days when the kids are sick/off from school/family simcha etc.
On the other hand, I just can't picture life without my job. I've been working ever since. What happens after you send off the bigger kids? You turn around, go back into the house, and?! What would I do with the time I'd be at work? All my errands (at least the important ones) always got done. Won't I be bored? Unstimulated. In a snood and sweatshirt all day?
I can see a need to go out every day. Where would I go?
I do feel drained and done from the constant running, but ladies help me out; how does the alternative realistically look?
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amother
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Yesterday at 10:13 am
Yes I know finances is the main thing to consider. Obviously.
But I want to hear about the other aspects in terms of feeling stimulated, accomplished etc
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amother
Trillium
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Yesterday at 10:17 am
If I didn't need the money I can think of other ways to keep myself busy. Chesed, shiurim, exercise etc...but alas I have bills to pay.
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amother
Pansy
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Yesterday at 10:18 am
For me the happy medium to all that stress posted above is to work from home. (Still have to send my baby out, but there is a lot less rushing and I can still work with sick kids at home, etc.) That being said, I work ONLY for the money and would stop the instant I didn't need to. I am not one bit worried about how I'd fill my day, even when all the kids are out and grown (at which point I'm hoping I'll have marrieds and grandchildren who can use my help.)
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amother
Turquoise
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Yesterday at 10:19 am
Could you look at part-time work? I don't know what your current job is but could you find a way of having more flexible hours?
I work in an office where they've agreed on me having flexible hours and it means I can start work at 9.30 one day. I can leave early another day for an appointment or stay late to make up hours.
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amother
DarkYellow
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Yesterday at 10:25 am
I would declutter all day every day and in between maybe make nice dinners.
I say would because I also wish to stop when I'm due. But can't imagine giving up a job I've worked at 13 years.
My personal concern isnt how to fill the day, rather how to feel stimulated intellectually, and losing my social life.
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amother
Black
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Yesterday at 10:26 am
Back to bed until newborn is sleep trained
Exercise , Social outings , organizing, errands, shopping…
Fancy outings one a month
Reconnect with random friends and relatives
Nights that are relaxing, because errands and chores happen by day
The harchavas hadaas of just being home and your focus is family is a gift.
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amother
Clover
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Yesterday at 10:28 am
amother OP wrote: | Yes I know finances is the main thing to consider. Obviously.
But I want to hear about the other aspects in terms of feeling stimulated, accomplished etc |
If I retired, I'd spend my time learning. Accomplishment would be in covering ground, taking good notes, and retaining a good amount of the material. Right now I don't have as much time as I'd like to learn, and often that time is in the car or other places where I'm not in a position to take notes and can only learn passively which of course if bad for retention. I don't do any chazara either, unless I happen to relearn the same material with one of my kids.
There are also quite a few limudei chol topics I'd like to spend time on. Maybe I'd do those in the afternoons.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Yesterday at 10:29 am
Can u take off a year and then go back??
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amother
Currant
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Yesterday at 11:12 am
You would be surprised how quickly your time feels when you have a house full of kids and a baby.
You need to be learned to be disciplined about getting dressed and going out on things. But I very much doubt you will be bored
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amother
DarkPurple
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Yesterday at 11:37 am
I just gave up my job after 15 years! I’m literally in heaven! I have a newborn at home and I love just being able to sit and hold him in a quiet house without any distractions. Everything happens at a slower pace. bH my Mornings and nights are extremely hectic. I love having quiet peaceful days. Right now I’ve just been organizing the house from the summer/yt clutter - maybe in the winter I would get a little antsy- or maybe I’ll finally follow through with all the things I wanted to do in life I aim to make a weekly list of what I’d like to focus on and stick to it. The hours go by so quickly! Especially with a baby who needs me so frequently.
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amother
Yarrow
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Yesterday at 11:40 am
Once the kids are all in school, if you are bored during the day then you can find another job to work at.
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familyfirst
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Today at 10:26 am
You will have a baby at home to care for
You won’t be bored
But keep your work skills current if possible, by going into work once a week or working a few hours a week at home. That way you can renter the work force if and when you need to
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amother
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Today at 10:35 am
familyfirst wrote: | You will have a baby at home to care for
You won’t be bored
But keep your work skills current if possible, by going into work once a week or working a few hours a week at home. That way you can renter the work force if and when you need to |
This is my dream. Don't know if it will be possible... Have to see if my employer will be willing.
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amother
Seagreen
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Today at 10:36 am
I stopped working now, probably only for the year. I have not been bored so far! Busy with yom tov and shopping and now taking care of endless appointments. I'm loving it.
I find the first year after a baby so hard to work. Maybe you can stop working, see how it goes, and in a few years go back.
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simcha12plus
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Today at 10:47 am
your baby, even the most excellent and calm one, will fill a lot of your time.
If you are used to having a baby at a babysitter while you work, you will now have to do what the babysitter was doing. You will have to do all the feedings, burping, changing, and getting baby to sleep.
If you are going to cut down on household help, you will need to do that work too.
If you stay home, your pace will be slower and hopefully calmer. You will find yourself with flex time for appointments, learning, volunteering, and a little bit of free time.
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amother
Gray
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Today at 10:49 am
Can you cut hours? IMO that’s the best of both worlds. I’d there room in your field to expand on your own or something like that? It might give you more flexibility
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amother
Chambray
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Today at 10:54 am
It depends on your personality. I can’t see myself stop working completely ever. But I would love to do a very part time (either few hours day or only a few days a week) job. I don’t think working from home gives you the social stimulation or the push to get out of a tichel and sweatshirt.
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