So anxious about 4mo sleep regression

amother

OP ↓

Sat, Oct 26 2024, 5:03 pm

My baby is starting his 4 month sleep regression Sad

He's my 4th (and unexpected) and I know exactly what I'm in for and I am panicking Crying

Something about my babies' sleep gets me so worked up and triggered and this period is the WORST. BH he has been reasonable until now, falls asleep himself with swaddle, paci and white noise - though the swaddle has to go now. Naps were mostly reasonable, nights were basically feedings every 3-4 hours. Last few nights he's been up every 2-2.5hrs and today's naps weren't great.
I'm just so sad and scared and overwhelmed.

amother

Nutmeg ↓

Sat, Oct 26 2024, 9:00 pm

Hungry? You could start solids at this age. Or maybe supplement with formula at night. By that age my babies aren't full enough on nursing, I've found a bottle at night or solids helps.

amother

Zinnia ↓

Sat, Oct 26 2024, 11:37 pm

What jumps out at me is your words
Sad
Scared
Anxious
Overwhelmed
Take care of yourself... You do sound overwhelmed.

Babies schedules evolve a lot over the first year, I have 6 kids I can't say any of them were exactly the same eating and sleeping and temperament wise...the only times I managed less and called the baby "hard and colicky " is when I was not recovering terribly well emotionally...

amother

Cream

Sat, Oct 26 2024, 11:44 pm

amother Nutmeg wrote:

Hungry? You could start solids at this age. Or maybe supplement with formula at night. By that age my babies aren't full enough on nursing, I've found a bottle at night or solids helps.

Solids at 4 months??

amother

DarkYellow ↓

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 8:14 am

I read somewhere online that at the 4 month sleep regression baby wakes up more often and is like "oh no! Where am I??"
If you rock your baby or hold your baby to sleep then when they wake up they want that again...to be rocked or held or whatever other sleep association they have

Your baby associates sleep with swaddle, paci and white noise. So when your baby wakes up and goes "oh no!" He'll drift back to sleep easier because he is still how you left him, maybe minus the paci? So replace the paci and let him put himself back to sleep. It may take a few nights of him laying awake trying to fall back asleep every 2-3 hours. But don't nurse back to sleep every time or it'll become habit.

My baby has only those 3 associations as well and the sleep regression only gave me 2 hard nights Baruch Hashem

amother

↑ DarkYellow ↓

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 8:16 am

I also found that at 4 month mark baby can be up for longer wake window. Try keeping your baby up longer before nap time and it should help get longer nap.
Also if baby wakes up mid nap give some time to see if he will fall back asleep again

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 12:44 pm

amother Nutmeg wrote:

Hungry? You could start solids at this age. Or maybe supplement with formula at night. By that age my babies aren't full enough on nursing, I've found a bottle at night or solids helps.

I've been offering a formula bottle before I go to sleep every night for weeks already. Now he's waking even before then and not finishing his bottle.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 12:45 pm

amother Zinnia wrote:

Yeah, story of my life atm. And there's not much I can change. This was an unexpected pregnancy and he was born in the middle of a few major life changes. I'm definitely not doing the best emotionally.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 12:47 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

I could let him try fall back asleep, but if I wait 30 min then that means myself and DH are awake that long too, then if it doesn't work I'll need to nurse anyway... And my babies aren't so easygoing that they'll get the message in 2 nights.
What did your baby's naps look like during the regression?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 12:48 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

Yes, I did see that he could be up a little longer than I've been leaving him. So adjusting that too.

smss

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 1:40 pm

amother Nutmeg wrote:

Yes. Not bread at that age, but apple, pears, carrots or banana etc.

Those are all lower calorie than breastmilk and formula, and the AAP and WHO both now say to wait until 6 months to start solids regardless.

The 4 month sleep regression isn't about hunger, it's about a permanent change in the baby's sleep patterns to go through sleep cycles more often and many babies need to be settled between cycles.

OP, I hear you and wish I had advice. The sleep deprivation is so so debilitating. I'm currently in the thick of it too...

amother

↑ DarkYellow

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 2:24 pm

amother OP wrote:

Would your baby be crying during the 30 minutes? Or just laying awake?
I'd put a noise machine by my head and try my best to sleep

My baby started waking up at nap time after 1 sleep cycle (40 minutes), I leave baby be and eventually falls back asleep
Sometimes 1 sleep cycle is all baby needs...
I find my baby naps way better on a full stomach, vs waking up from hunger

amother

↑ Zinnia

Sun, Oct 27 2024, 9:55 pm

amother OP wrote:

Can you get more physical help to ease things?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Oct 28 2024, 5:37 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

Well, last night he went about 40 min with real loud kvetching. And I have a sound machine near my head, plus earplugs, and it does nothing. I hardly slept between 1am-8am.
I think your baby has an easygoing temperament. I believe most babies won't 'eventually fall back asleep'.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Oct 28 2024, 5:38 pm

amother Zinnia wrote:

Can you get more physical help to ease things?

I need sleep. All the help in the world won't give me that - if someone's watching my baby, there's another 101 things that have to get done. I can't take time off to sleep during the day.

amother

↑ OP

Tue, Oct 29 2024, 3:44 pm

Last night he fed 1.20am, then was up at 3.40am. I tried resettling until 4.20, at which point is was 3hrs from last feed so just gave him a bottle. It took until after 5am for him to all back asleep. He was up at 7am.

First nap: 45min, wouldn't resettle.
Second nap: 45min, wouldn't resettle.
Third nap: 30min, left him kvetching 15min, then resettled him in my arms for 15 min and he slept another 20ish min
Fourth nap: 25min