Whaaat were they thinking?!

amother

Buttercup

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:46 pm

Sent me to the dr from age 8 alone, and would ask me to call her before it’s my turn so she could quickly come. I dont think she always made it on time. I’m sure the receptionist thought “what are they thinking”?

She would leave us as babies sleeping in our stroller in front of the house…in Brooklyn. Check up on us every so often.

Allowed us to take unlimited amount of unhealthy snacks and junk daily.
Pretzels were officially considered a healthy enough breakfast.

Put us in hand me down shoes and bras that didn’t fit us.

The answer really is, they weren’t thinking. Or definitely not about us.

amother

Royalblue

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:48 pm

My great grandfather sent his pregnant married daughter to Israel for 3 months to take care is his in-laws. Without her husband and 3 kids.

He offered their apartment to some Rav that came to America to visit.

↑ giftedmom ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:53 pm

amother Lemon wrote:

Most of these examples are really not so bad.

It was the 80s and 90s. Life was waaaaay more chill back then. Kids roamed the neighborhood till dark from the age of like 6. Kids took public transportation and it was fine.

And TV and junk food was also considered fine.

Hate to break it to ya but 12 years ago was 2013

amother

↑ Junglegreen ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 7:01 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

Never had a tv in my room and went to bed at 4 am reading all my teen years. I dunno. I'm raising my kids with much more limited screen time than I had growing up, but I don't think TV ruined me, I don't think my kids are any more curious, or their brains more developed, or their hobbies more interesting than mine were. I'm being really honest here and wouldn't admit this aloud ever. I kind of think they just fight more and get more wild and into more trouble than I did. They are definitely more wholesome and innocent than I was, so there's that.

I still watch plenty of TV today and let my kids watch/play video games. I'm not anti at all. We also are all big readers, so I know full well it's not a contradiction. But that doesn't mean it's a good idea for TV (or, nowadays, other screen based entertainment) to be a free for all. It is 100% a poor parenting decision to let your 12 year old have unfettered, unlimited access as my parents did. I don't feel ruined or anything, but it was not healthy for me and I definitely developed unhealthy habits that till today sometimes crop up for me.

Librarian ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 7:54 pm

After Seminary in Israel 3 friends and I stopped over in Europe on our way home to the USA and did an 11 day 6 country road trip. England, France, Switzerland, Italy, Amsterdam and Germany. This was June 1988. We took the Eurotrain, sometimes sleeping on an overnight train, sometimes staying by frum people and once in a very nice hostel. No cell phones. No credit cards just travelers checks. Four 17 year old Bais Yaakov girls. We got off in Florence train station at 1:00am. First time I saw a transvestite. We arrived at the Paris train station in middle of a riot, pepper spray overwhelming the air. The first night we slept on the train we did not properly lock the door and luckily it was only a backpack that was stolen while we slept. One night we shared a sleeping car with 2 strangers luckily they were an elderly Italian couple. Food was definitely scarce. We were not even good friends but our common denominator was that our parents were insane enough to let us do this trip. The whole trip cost me less than $500. It was one of the greatest experiences of my life.

↑ Librarian ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 7:58 pm

amother Topaz wrote:

Took the city bus and subway to school there and back every day in high school. In the winter months it was dark on the way home. NO CELL PHONE! All my friends also did this, it was a different world in those days.

Me too. 1980's. In Brooklyn. It was not safe. It was stupid. I was afraid walking in the street to and from the subway station in the dark. I kept a scissor in my pocket.

↑ Librarian

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 8:05 pm

amother Lemon wrote:

I grew up in the 70s and 80s in Brooklyn. Yes, our parents were way more chill. But that does not mean it was safe. My mother was mugged on 18th avenue in broad daylight. Who here remembers the terror of the Son of Sam? Burglaries were rampant (we were robbed in our BP apartment while we were home. And then came AIDS.

amother

Calendula

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 8:09 pm

amother Ecru wrote:

I flew to Israel alone at 11. To be fair, I felt completely confident too. I still don’t think it was a big deal.

I also flew to Israel at age 11, with no one but a bunch of my 11-year-old friends lol

amother

Electricblue

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 8:17 pm

Is this only about parents?

About 15 years ago, our camp counselor took us wading in a creek. It was fast moving, there were snake spottings, some of us couldn’t swim, there was no real adult in sight….

Also in camp, we once had an activity where we colored our hair using among other non washable spray paint…. Surprised

Also my kindergarten teacher would threaten us to be locked in the school attic if we misbehaved. We were 4 and 5 Can't Believe It

↑ giftedmom ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 8:20 pm

amother Electricblue wrote:

Also my kindergarten teacher would threaten us to be locked in the school attic if we misbehaved. We were 4 and 5 Can't Believe It

We used to go tubing on the Delaware. Recently with all the drownings I was thinking about how wild the water was and how there were dangerous rocks all over. I wonder if camps still go.

amother

Whitesmoke ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 9:05 pm

I guess this isnt so weird but growing up in chassidish community (noone ik locally has Tvs or the like)

I would take 'long walks or go to friends' for hours each night coming home after 2 sometimes and my mom rarely questioned me. Also I mightve lied I dont remember. but her generally not understanding what ik still weirds me out. whatever. Im still 20 maybe ill understand when I grow up

amother

DarkYellow

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 9:13 pm

amother Whitesmoke wrote:

Can I ask what you were doing while you were taking 'long walks' or 'going to friends'?

amother

↑ Whitesmoke

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 9:18 pm

amother DarkYellow wrote:

Can I ask what you were doing while you were taking 'long walks' or 'going to friends'?

walking for hours in non jewish areas or hangout spots and fantasizing about things I cant write here

nothing too crazy for most of the time but still I COULDVE was just scared to take risks whatever ended up backfiring later on when I had to chap arain and do everything crazy in the world before I got married whatever im a bad girl with a good heart tho

↑ giftedmom ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 9:26 pm

amother Whitesmoke wrote:

You’re not a bad girl