Whaaat were they thinking?!

amother

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 11:27 am

Just a light thread of times you saw or remembered something and couldn’t help thinking “what where they thinking?!”

I’ll go first

When I was 10 my parents got me my own laptop that was unfiltered and they never ever bothered to look at what I was doing in my room with the door closed, they never even went through it there was a password on it too, I wasn’t doing anything bad and now as a parent I can’t help exclaim “what where they thinking!!!!!!!”

amother

DarkOrange ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 11:41 am

Giving us sugar cereal for breakfast every morning.

Letting us watch TV for hours and hours- the content was never terrible since this was the 90s, but just the amount of time. my mom admitted years later this was her biggest mistake as a parent. she used TV as a babysitter.

Dentist appointments were once every 2-3 years instead of every 6 months.

Never really took homework seriously. I rarely did my homework as a kid.

amother

Iris

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 1:25 pm

amother DarkOrange wrote:

Did you actually suffer or have bad consequences from not doing your homework?

amother

Forestgreen ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:16 pm

amother DarkOrange wrote:

Also had sugary cereal for breakfast and watched lots and lots of TV. And? I'm curious how you think it ruined you.

amother

↑ Forestgreen

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:32 pm

amother Junglegreen wrote:

I asked for a TV in my room when I was 12 and they agreed to it. That was the last time I ever went to bed at a normal time lol. Definitely not smart on their end.

Never had a tv in my room and went to bed at 4 am reading all my teen years. I dunno. I'm raising my kids with much more limited screen time than I had growing up, but I don't think TV ruined me, I don't think my kids are any more curious, or their brains more developed, or their hobbies more interesting than mine were. I'm being really honest here and wouldn't admit this aloud ever. I kind of think they just fight more and get more wild and into more trouble than I did. They are definitely more wholesome and innocent than I was, so there's that.

amother

Almond

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:39 pm

My mother left What to Expect When You're Expecting and similar books in an accessible place and I read them as a preteen and learned about sx and pregnancy. At the time I thought it was an oversight but I told my mother years later and she told me she had left them there on purpose...

amother

↑ DarkOrange ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:48 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

Also had sugary cereal for breakfast and watched lots and lots of TV. And? I'm curious how you think it ruined you.

Did I say it ruined me?
I thought this was supposed to be a light thread.

amother

↑ DarkOrange

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:55 pm

amother Iris wrote:

Did you actually suffer or have bad consequences from not doing your homework?

Did I suffer? Most definitely not.

Bad consequences - I guess that depends on how you define that. I probably would have a lot more knowledge if my parents actually took my schooling seriously. I mean they were paying tuition anyways, might as well make the most out of it right?

Funnily enough, the least of the issues was probably the lack of dentist appointments. Never had a cavity in my life. IIRC, my siblings also had maybe 0-3 cavities max. Maybe that's why they took us so infrequently LOL

amother

Steelblue

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 3:00 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

My husband grew up with a lot of TV and he doesn't either think it ruined him or anything like that. We are much more open with screen time because of that. I probably wouldn't be OK with it if up to me. I grew up with no TV at all. Now that I'm 50, the younger kids watch way more than the older ones ever did which makes me feel guilty. The older kids started with Jewish videos but its morphed into secular stuff as the kids got older and were bored with what they had. I think my younger self knew that once we started, it would be opening up a lot more than what we started out with. But he still doesn't think its a big deal and its interesting to me to see that you think similarly. Makes me feel less bad! So thank you!

amother

Bluebonnet

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 3:00 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

Also had sugary cereal for breakfast and watched lots and lots of TV. And? I'm curious how you think it ruined you.

Same
I am sure it was better than dealing with my neurotic mother

amother

Lightgray ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 4:28 pm

Left me alone at night while she went to the gym. I was 10 and used to wake up terrified cuz no one was home. My father worked long hours and came home crazy late. It was me and another sibling (age 11) alone for hours.

amother

Cyclamen

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 5:44 pm

Switched me to a different school of a different hashkafah located in a different city, thinking it would magically solve all problems. Essentially dumped me into a culture that was completely foreign to me…. And expected me to stay exactly as I was before…
Got really mad at me when I changed.
All this at just 12 years old
Traveling alone an hour each way every day. If there was play practice I would take the last bus home. I remember vividly walking down deserted streets in a blizzard after 11 at night. At the age of 13.
And much more in that vein. I am lucky to be alive and that nothing crazy happened to me.

amother

Topaz ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:10 pm

Took the city bus and subway to school there and back every day in high school. In the winter months it was dark on the way home. NO CELL PHONE! All my friends also did this, it was a different world in those days.

amother

Yellow

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:36 pm

amother Yolk wrote:

I used to take the subway in Brooklyn alone as a teen (10-12 years ago), sometimes at night too.
Now I think back and knowing the dangers , I would never let my kid use the subway alone at that age!!!!!!

Same- but back then isn't the same as today.

amother

Lemon ↓

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:42 pm

Most of these examples are really not so bad.

It was the 80s and 90s. Life was waaaaay more chill back then. Kids roamed the neighborhood till dark from the age of like 6. Kids took public transportation and it was fine.

And TV and junk food was also considered fine.

fauxreal

Mon, Oct 07 2024, 6:45 pm

amother Yolk wrote:

Same.
It was so normal. I think times were more normal. I never ever take the subway these days.