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-> Parenting our children
-> Infants
amother
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 Sun, Oct 06 2024, 4:47 pm
Any tips for Velcro babies who refuse to sleep?
My baby is 8 months old and needs to be held almost 109% of the time. I’m ok with that. I’ve had a Velcro-baby in the past. It’s only temporary, all of that. That’s not my issue over here- this is just some background.
He has never been the greatest sleeper, but again, I’m ok-ish with that lol. The hard part is he needs me to physically hold and rock him until he falls asleep, and he weighs 25 pounds. Lately he has been taking shorter naps, refusing naps altogether, and/or waking up the second I put him down in his crib. He will wake up in middle of the night, I will finally get him back to sleep, and then he wakes up when he barely touches his mattress. So the cycle goes on for about an hour, and this happens 2-3 times per night.
Anyone have experience and advice for me? I’m falling apart.
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amother
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 4:51 pm
What’s a Velcro baby?
I never heard the term.
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amother
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 4:53 pm
Extra clingy. Like Velcro!
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michimochi
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 4:58 pm
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Would you consider co-sleeping? My baby was like that. When we started cosleeping, when she woke up she wouldbe fine as long as she could reach out and feel me there, then would cuddle up and go back to sleep.
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amother
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 5:02 pm
| michimochi wrote: | | Would you consider co-sleeping? My baby was like that. When we started cosleeping, when she woke up she wouldbe fine as long as she could reach out and feel me there, then would cuddle up and go back to sleep. |
Like bed-sharing? I considered that, and I am not 100% opposed to it, but I’m still unsure. I’m a very delicate sleeper, so I’m not sure how it would help my sleep deprivation in the end.
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michimochi
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 5:19 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | Like bed-sharing? I considered that, and I am not 100% opposed to it, but I’m still unsure. I’m a very delicate sleeper, so I’m not sure how it would help my sleep deprivation in the end. |
Yeah, bed-sharing. If you're not totally opposed it may be worth a shot. Maybe even though you are a light sleeper you would be able to sleep well with the peace of mind that your baby is also happily sleeping next to you and you don't have to be on alert?
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amother
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 5:32 pm
| michimochi wrote: | | Yeah, bed-sharing. If you're not totally opposed it may be worth a shot. Maybe even though you are a light sleeper you would be able to sleep well with the peace of mind that your baby is also happily sleeping next to you and you don't have to be on alert? |
I can give it a shot, since I feel like I’ve tried everything else. But ive been trying to get him to sleep for the past hour, and he doesn’t want me to put him down, even in my bed. Cries and squirms even though I’m right there.
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michimochi
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 7:25 pm
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Try snuggling him into your side a little and wrapping an arm around him? (I do over baby's legs for safety) Do you nurse him? I have had success putting the baby down while still latched, then repositioning to be comfortable
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michimochi
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Sun, Oct 06 2024, 7:26 pm
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Just thought of this... Does your baby have reflux? Maybe he is comfortable when held for a reason other than just wanting to be with mommy? Does he respond to being propped up a little, like on a pillow or an inclined mattress?
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amother
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Mon, Oct 07 2024, 11:08 am
It didn’t help, and now I’m going through my work day in a complete daze.
He doesn’t have reflux, positioning doesn’t make a difference. He didn’t mind nursing lying down, but he woke up and cried the second I stopped.
I really hope it’s just teething and it’ll stop soon. Poor baby is so tired. At least I can have coffee
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Rachel Shira
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Mon, Oct 07 2024, 11:24 am
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If you don’t want this advice it’s totally fine… but one solution to this problem is sleep training. It would change your life.
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amother
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Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:09 pm
| amother Turquoise wrote: | So this will take up to two weeks. I’ll try to set it up. Very simply:
1) get a sound machine
2) Have a set bedtime routine.
Bath,book and feed
3) put him down*
4) After 10 minutes, leave the room.
5) if he’s crying, come back in and reassure him. Like rub his back say mommy is here.
6) after a few minutes leave the room.
7) repeat as needed but wait beifre you go back into the room.
8) feed gonna dark room no eye contact no talking to him. Change his diaper if needed.
9) Do the same thing for the second feeding.
10) do this for three days.
11) have your husband Repeat the process for another three days but he should sit farther away from the baby.
12) By now he should have the hang of it and donbedtime routine but
leave the room right away if he cries wait a few minutes and reassure him and then leave.
13) Do this for about a week and he should get the hang of it.
14) You could also feed more during the day so he’ll sleep thru the night. |
Thank you for writing this out! We get stuck on the third step, which is the point of this thread. As soon as I set him down, he screams and kicks and squirms and sits up and doesn’t stop crying and reaching for me. Doesn’t matter how sleepy he is, he will automatically wake up, and then im stuck rocking him for almost an hour.
Also my husband works overtime, many nights until 2am, so he’s gotta stay outta the equation.
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Rachel Shira
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Mon, Oct 07 2024, 2:20 pm
Exactly… they don’t want to leave you. There will be some tears involved in any method.
I would say the first step is make sure his naps are scheduled right so he’s tired enough at bedtime. You do not want to sleep train an under tired baby or there will be more crying than needed.
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amother
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Mon, Oct 07 2024, 3:42 pm
| Rachel Shira wrote: | Exactly… they don’t want to leave you. There will be some tears involved in any method.
I would say the first step is make sure his naps are scheduled right so he’s tired enough at bedtime. You do not want to sleep train an under tired baby or there will be more crying than needed. |
lol this is true.
Ok I will learn to tolerate him crying. Won’t it overstimulate him, though? Wont that keep him awake and defeat the whole purpose?
His naps are a whole nother story. Contact naps when I’m home. And I have no idea what goes on at the babysitter. Currently working on finding a new one, don’t worry.
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