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Can’t live on this anymore
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amother
Dahlia  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 10:59 pm
How r people making so much and it’s still not enough
I get so stressed out reading things like this.
Is it really necessary to need more than 400k to raise a family? Why on earth is 300k with 3 small kids not more than enough??
I’m not even going to say how much we’re living on right now with one kid
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amother
  Brunette  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:06 pm
amother NeonBlue wrote:
If you mind answering questions, then please ignore the rest.

Is your car paid up? And you gave a pretty detailed list, so what would be the everything else that would amount to $1500 monthly?


Yes cars were bought secondhand with cash.

“Everything else”- some furniture (bought a home recently), small vacation, therapy, kids extracurriculars, replacing things that break every so often like eyeglasses laptops phones, things for kids like bikes, books, toys, yom tov expenses, tips for rebbis/teachers, car maintenance and repairs, gifts, money my husband pays to his chavrusa, diapers, chol hamoed trips, cleaners, barber, sheitwlmacher, large “once every few years” purchases like sheitels, dental work (thousands of dollars a year) etc etc.
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amother
  Brunette  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:09 pm
amother Dahlia wrote:
How r people making so much and it’s still not enough
I get so stressed out reading things like this.
Is it really necessary to need more than 400k to raise a family? Why on earth is 300k with 3 small kids not more than enough??
I’m not even going to say how much we’re living on right now with one kid


No we lived perfectly fine on $60k with 2 small kids. Once you buy a house life gets expensive.
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amother
  Brunette  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:13 pm
amother Lightpink wrote:
I understand brunette is not op and op says,she doesn't have a fancy house. Brunette may also not have a fancy house . However paying 5,500 morgage for your general American (or anyone) is considered a high morgage. Yes homes,in frum communitys are very expensive even if the home is nothing special.
Many frum people think that 1,00,000 (and multiply) is a normal amount to spend on a home. If you purchase a home with a morgage that size it will eat up a tremendous amount of your profit.
These finances need to ideally be looked at prior to purchase


Of course I understand $5,500 is an outrageous amount to be paying monthly for a mortgage. The reason I specified 2,800 square feet and 1 mile walk from shul is because I wanted to make it clear how insane the market is these days. We bought a comfortable house but not a mansion, we didn’t buy in a highly desirable area, we were pioneers. Still barely have frum Jews around us. Yet look how crazy our mortgage is. And yes of course we calculated if we would be able to afford the mortgage, now and in the future. Like I mentioned above, we hustle to save a lot of money in addition to our $300k regular income. We’ve actually managed to save an extra $60k just since January of this year BH! We have approx $350k we can choose to throw at our mortgage now but it doesn’t make financial sense at this moment. We are not drowning, we are very financially responsible. But yes such a tremendous mortgage is a huge burden psychologically and I wish it could’ve been different. But unfortunately people buying these days have very limited options. And for the record our home wasn’t near $1,000.000.
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amother
Teal


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:19 pm
amother Dahlia wrote:
How r people making so much and it’s still not enough
I get so stressed out reading things like this.
Is it really necessary to need more than 400k to raise a family? Why on earth is 300k with 3 small kids not more than enough??
I’m not even going to say how much we’re living on right now with one kid


Same here
It's really stressing me out Crying
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amother
  Brunette  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:21 pm
amother Teal wrote:
Same here
It's really stressing me out Crying


Like I said above we lived perfectly fine on $60k with 2 small kids and cheap rent. Once you buy a house and start paying healthcare and tuition, life gets expensive fast.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:24 pm
amother Dahlia wrote:
How r people making so much and it’s still not enough
I get so stressed out reading things like this.
Is it really necessary to need more than 400k to raise a family? Why on earth is 300k with 3 small kids not more than enough??
I’m not even going to say how much we’re living on right now with one kid


It honestly worked better on less. Now we pay more taxes, we pay health insurance, we have big house bills, a lot of tuition… life got more complicated. We did well for 2 years on this income until inflation and now it’s impossible. And no one wants to give raises.
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amother
Candycane


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:25 pm
amother Brunette wrote:
Like I said above we lived perfectly fine on $60k with 2 small kids and cheap rent. Once you buy a house and start paying healthcare and tuition, life gets expensive fast.


How long ago did you live on 60k with two kids? Because very high inflation happened super recently, and it’s inflation that’s making the numbers not work.
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amother
  Dahlia


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:38 pm
amother Brunette wrote:
Of course I understand $5,500 is an outrageous amount to be paying monthly for a mortgage. The reason I specified 2,800 square feet and 1 mile walk from shul is because I wanted to make it clear how insane the market is these days. We bought a comfortable house but not a mansion, we didn’t buy in a highly desirable area, we were pioneers. Still barely have frum Jews around us. Yet look how crazy our mortgage is. And yes of course we calculated if we would be able to afford the mortgage, now and in the future. Like I mentioned above, we hustle to save a lot of money in addition to our $300k regular income. We’ve actually managed to save an extra $60k just since January of this year BH! We have approx $350k we can choose to throw at our mortgage now but it doesn’t make financial sense at this moment. We are not drowning, we are very financially responsible. But yes such a tremendous mortgage is a huge burden psychologically and I wish it could’ve been different. But unfortunately people buying these days have very limited options. And for the record our home wasn’t near $1,000.000.


60k in savings in less than a year is a dream
Don’t worry so much lol
You’re not rich but ur very comfortable in my opinion
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amother
  Lightpink  


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:41 pm
amother DarkYellow wrote:
Why, there are so many expenses that weren't on that list!
Toys,
Books
school trips/fees
teachers tips
gifts for family
anniversary gifts
dental work
sheitel macher
facial or manicure once in a while or as needed
any subscriptions
pharmacy/prescriptions
cleaners
I can think of many more!


...lots,of extras here to cut back.
These,expenses,shouldn't be so high each month especially not if you having trouble getting by
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amother
DarkGreen


 

Post Tue, Oct 01 2024, 11:47 pm
I kindly disagree! All her expenses seem very very normal!!!
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mig100




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 12:06 am
amother Brunette wrote:
Like I said above we lived perfectly fine on $60k with 2 small kids and cheap rent. Once you buy a house and start paying healthcare and tuition, life gets expensive fast.


were you on government programs?
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amother
Lemon


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 12:40 am
Completely with you on this.
We have 1 child bH. Paying $750 for babysitting ($9000 a year!).
BH bought a tiny starter home. Mortgage+Home insurance is under 3k which is super amazing in this economy. We will need to extend/finish garage at some point but will cross that bridge when we there.
We make a combined income of 100k and can hardly pay the bills.
I’m still on my parents health insurance but we pay for my husband and baby.
We have 2 cars and combined payments are $500 monthly. Life is just sososo expensive.
All my shopping is Walmart and aldi, kosher grocery just for chalav Yisrael and chicken.
It’s the one time necessities that get you. For example- I can make it if we only buy groceries and nothing else. But...my baby needs a high chair and went up a size. Or I ran out of a supplement that I need which costs $40

I just daven that this year should bring us more $$ and lower prices. And that elections should change the economy in a major way.
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amother
Bellflower  


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 9:15 am
amother OP wrote:
My mortgage is 3700. It’s the only expense that’s not super crazy. Tuition was raised this year, all food prices went up, our gas and electric bills went up too, we pay for health insurance which has monthly premiums plus copays and coinsurance…
I am on programs. I get less than 500 a month for food. You think that pays my grocery bill? I have jerseycare but that’s my secondary insurance because it doesn’t cover my kids services. I still need to pay private health insurance. I’m also paying tuition, sure it’s reduced but it’s still a way bigger percent of my income. I’m paying gas and electric. And when you pay off your mortgage you’ll own a property. What will my rent money get me?

I always laugh when people act like they’re jealous of the poor. If you really thought the grass was greener you’d quit your high paying jobs and try living like we do.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 9:34 am
amother Bellflower wrote:
I am on programs. I get less than 500 a month for food. You think that pays my grocery bill? I have jerseycare but that’s my secondary insurance because it doesn’t cover my kids services. I still need to pay private health insurance. I’m also paying tuition, sure it’s reduced but it’s still a way bigger percent of my income. I’m paying gas and electric. And when you pay off your mortgage you’ll own a property. What will my rent money get me?

I always laugh when people act like they’re jealous of the poor. If you really thought the grass was greener you’d quit your high paying jobs and try living like we do.


I did live like this so I can compare my life. I didn’t get food stamps but 500 in free food month makes a massive difference it’s nothing to laugh at. And I had no house bills when I rented it also made a huge difference. Gas and electric on an apartment is way less than a house. I’m not jealous at all I like my life, but I don’t think you can possibly understand how hard it is to stretch the money for these expenses in this economy.
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amother
  Bellflower  


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 9:40 am
amother OP wrote:
I did live like this so I can compare my life. I didn’t get food stamps but 500 in free food month makes a massive difference it’s nothing to laugh at. And I had no house bills when I rented it also made a huge difference. Gas and electric on an apartment is way less than a house. I’m not jealous at all I like my life, but I don’t think you can possibly understand how hard it is to stretch the money for these expenses in this economy.
I don’t live in an apartment. How could I fit my kids in an apartment? And yes 500 a month makes a difference but you earn thousands more than me every month. It sounds like you think us poor people can just live the way you did back when your kids were babies. My expenses have soared too. Again, if you think being poor is so easy, try living the way we do for a bit.
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amother
  OP


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 9:51 am
amother Bellflower wrote:
I don’t live in an apartment. How could I fit my kids in an apartment? And yes 500 a month makes a difference but you earn thousands more than me every month. It sounds like you think us poor people can just live the way you did back when your kids were babies. My expenses have soared too. Again, if you think being poor is so easy, try living the way we do for a bit.


Never said I want to be poor again. But in a way we are poor because after taxes we don’t bring all that much more home than we did before this amount. It’s still annoying when we try to talk about our lives being difficult and all the people making less make the thread about themselves.
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amother
  Brunette  


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 9:59 am
amother Candycane wrote:
How long ago did you live on 60k with two kids? Because very high inflation happened super recently, and it’s inflation that’s making the numbers not work.


2021. I know inflation has gotten crazy. It’s terrible.
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amother
  Brunette  


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 10:00 am
mig100 wrote:
were you on government programs?


Yes. Medicaid and WIC.
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amother
  Bellflower


 

Post Wed, Oct 02 2024, 10:00 am
amother OP wrote:
Never said I want to be poor again. But in a way we are poor because after taxes we don’t bring all that much more home than we did before this amount. It’s still annoying when we try to talk about our lives being difficult and all the people making less make the thread about themselves.
I’m sorry you feel that way. I still want to respond to your comment here:
Quote:
We don’t have an expensive house, we don’t do vacations or live with luxuries. I was used to being able to buy food and cheap clothing for all my kids and now that’s hard. Because inflation is insane and prices tripled but our salaries did not. I don’t think people who aren’t on programs get it. We get nothing, no free food, no insurance, nothing. And we pay high taxes. And the money we bring home is just not lasting
Making it seem like people on programs are the ones who have it made. If you don’t want us poors “making it about ourselves” then don’t suggest that we have it easier than you, because that’s absolutely absurd.
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