Babysitting during shul for yomim noraim

↑ ShishKabob ↓

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 11:45 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Just because there is no chiyuv for a woman does not mean she cant daven in shul. Many women still want to take part in davening in shul on the yomim noraim.

Growing up, the shul hired non jewish teens as the local public school was closed as there were a lot of jewish teens that went.

Nothing wrong if thats what some mothers want to do. And our women's section was FULL.

Different priorities. I personally would do everything I can not to let a non jewish woman supervise my children if I had another option. Where I come from, it's just done if there really is no other option or in extenuating circumstances.

↑ tulip3

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 11:49 am

I think the "tafkid of a lady is to stay home with the kids" thing turned from a way to help women understand how to go through rosh hashana and yom kippur and do what they need to do with some meaning. But now people have taken that further-even if you have childcare or a way to go to shul for a little bit, it's better to stay home with your children because that's your job then hire someone. Honestly, whatever will make your day better and happier, do that.

↑ tichellady ↓

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 11:52 am

Blessing1 wrote:

No, we don't have to always be with our children, but there's a time and place for everything. Women have no chiyuv to go to shul to daven.

I think having a time and place to Daven, introspect and learn Torah should not be put down on a frum site

↑ Blessing1 ↓

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 12:22 pm

shabbatiscoming wrote:

OP's question is "what's normal in your community", so she's bound to get different replies from different people. Because different communities have different norms.

Last edited by Blessing1 on Mon, Sep 23 2024, 12:24 pm; edited 2 times in total

↑ Blessing1 ↓

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 12:23 pm

tichellady wrote:

I think having a time and place to Daven, introspect and learn Torah should not be put down on a frum site

Who's putting anything down?

mazeltov613

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 12:26 pm

My husband is the chazzan for all
Of Yomim zoraim. That means it’s all on me!! I have a baby so if my housekeeper is here over yuntif I can leave her home while she naps and go catch some of my husbands beautiful Davening. I have some kids with behavioral issues so being home with them is a huge challenge, I should probably start buying some new toys asap!!

↑ tichellady ↓

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 1:05 pm

Blessing1 wrote:

Who's putting anything down?

I think saying that leaving a child with a babysitter is not in the spirit of the day is putting down people and communities where this is the norm

↑ ShishKabob

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 1:22 pm

tichellady wrote:

I think saying that leaving a child with a babysitter is not in the spirit of the day is putting down people and communities where this is the norm

You left out one small word which makes the world of a difference. Non (jewish).

↑ shabbatiscoming

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 1:34 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

You left out one small word which makes the world of a difference. Non (jewish).

But again, in different communities, there are diffrrent norms.

mommygirlx2

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 1:39 pm

kangamom wrote:

What is normal in your community/shul to do with the young kids during davening? Please don't tell me to watch them all day myself as I'm not able to. Do you take turns babysitting eachother's kids with one or 2 friends? Do you hire non jewish babysitters? Shul provide babysitting? Share babysitting with a relative?

I stay home with my kids, never thought to do otherwise
I go to a womens shofar blowing
I don’t get to daven much (at all) but that’s not my job right now
I hang out with other mothers while our husbands are in shul!

↑ tichellady ↓

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 1:42 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

You left out one small word which makes the world of a difference. Non (jewish).

I don’t know anyone who has a Jewish babysitter or nanny. We must live in different worlds. In my world, being Jewish is not a prerequisite for being a caring, loving and responsible provider. In fact, most of the complaints I read about on this site about daycares involve Jewish ones in Lakewood

↑ Brit in Israel

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 1:54 pm

As a young teen (2nd to youngest in family) when being in shul was too long for me, I would go to my neighbour who had young kids and looked after her kids whilst she davened.
Did it on YK as well.

↑ Blessing1

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 2:01 pm

tichellady wrote:

I think saying that leaving a child with a babysitter is not in the spirit of the day is putting down people and communities where this is the norm

I did not say that. I didn't say anything about leaving kids with a babysitter.

RBPetra

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 2:15 pm

I'm a giyores and B"H have a good relationship with my parents and grandparents who all live nearby. I have asked for their help for babysitting on Yom Kippur especially and it's a huge huge bracha, especially since I am an awful faster. My grandmother holding my two week old son as I napped and rested is a very special Yom Kippur memory for me. On Rosh Hashanah I generally rely on groups at shul to get in some davening, though not the full. I have ADHD and can't do full davening and my son is young and doesn't handle super long groups either

↑ tichellady

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 5:12 pm

Blessing1 wrote:

I did not say that. I didn't say anything about leaving kids with a babysitter.

Didn’t say you said it, but it was said on this thread

mfb

Mon, Sep 23 2024, 5:33 pm

My mother told me she was walking home from shul many years ago on rosh hashonah and saw obviously Jewish kids with a babysitter watching the babysitter kneel in front of a church doing her prayers.
And I think this is what the person who wrote negatively about non Jewish babysitters was aiming to point out.
Do you know what your kids holy neshamos are doing/seeing while you are at shul?
Is that worth it?