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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:10 pm
My child went to a 1:4 swimming lesson and was handed to a stranger and put in the pool. Child was scared and didn’t let go of instructor. After a few minutes they start crying saying I want mommy I’m scared I want to come out… what would you do?
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#BestBubby
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:13 pm
Ask that the child be taken out.
Get a different instructor.
Most instructors go at a slow pace so children don't cry.
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:19 pm
amother OP wrote: | My child went to a 1:4 swimming lesson and was handed to a stranger and put in the pool. Child was scared and didn’t let go of instructor. After a few minutes they start crying saying I want mommy I’m scared I want to come out… what would you do? |
Handed to a stranger and put in the pool? What in the world. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. You want your child to have trauma from the water or learn how to swim using a gentle approach? I suggest going to a different place
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:21 pm
My heart broke I went to get her my mother in law ( her idea for the swimming) said she has to get used to it let her cry..
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:22 pm
I dont understand
How old is your child? Were you watching?
What do you mean by handed over to a stranger?
Is the child still a toddler?
Definitely normal for little children to cry.
But we dont know the whole story.
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amother
Stonewash
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:23 pm
Almost never let a child cry... Especially for something optional like swimming lessons.
The only exception I can think of is for medical issues, like if they need a throat culture or a shot.
Everything else is torture.
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:25 pm
She’s 2. Swimming was supposed to be fun… she has to go to school which will be with a frum experienced Morah
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:26 pm
A 2 year old having to go swimming??
Part of school?
I would say a 2 yo should only be going in a pool with a parent.
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kiwi strawberry
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:26 pm
1:4 meaning one instructor teaching 4 kids to swim? That is way too low of a ratio to be safe. An instructor cannot safely watch over 4 kids who can't swim if they are teaching them (and not just watching them swim in a shallow pool). Most swim lessons are 1:1. Anything higher than 1:2 is not safe and not ok.
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amother
Myrtle
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:26 pm
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:28 pm
No it was a fun activity mother in law wanted to do with my child. In the past they have gone into the pool together. Now she was handed to a stranger with 3 other children and told to sit while they each I guess take turns learning to kick ? I’m not sure but I knew from the first second she wasent happy.. mil said let her get used to it she’ll be fine. Until I heard her screaming and then I went right in to let her know I was there. She told me I’m scared mommy. But I’m made to seem like the crazy one bc I didn’t let her cry in a pool w a stranger.
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:32 pm
Your mil is crazy. Sorry. Why would you let your kid cry. Unless she’s getting a vaccine at the doctor you should never just let your kid cry “because it’s good for her”.
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:33 pm
Do you want her to continue lessons? She's your child not mil's child. You get to choose & no you're not stupid.
Unless your child has access to a pool she doesn't need to learn to swim just yet.
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:38 pm
amother Petunia wrote: | Do you want her to continue lessons? She's your child not mil's child. You get to chose & no you're not stupid.
Unless your child has access to a pool she doesn't need to learn to swim just yet. |
My in laws have a huge pool without a gate and I’m not comfortable with daughter going without me and they didn’t want to get a gate so I guess she thought swimming lessons would make me change my mind
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amother
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:39 pm
amother Daisy wrote: | Your mil is crazy. Sorry. Why would you let your kid cry. Unless she’s getting a vaccine at the doctor you should never just let your kid cry “because it’s good for her”. |
My poor sweet baby crying for mommy saying she’s scared my heart broke in half ofcource I ran to get her… mil said you should have let her get used to it
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amother
DarkMagenta
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:41 pm
I don’t get the ‘handed to a stranger’ part
Is this a figure of speech I’m unfamiliar with?
Do you mean she didn’t know the swim instructor ? That the instructor was a stranger to her?
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sequoia
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:44 pm
amother OP wrote: | My in laws have a huge pool without a gate and I’m not comfortable with daughter going without me and they didn’t want to get a gate so I guess she thought swimming lessons would make me change my mind |
They sound very negligent.
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B'Syata D'Shmya
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 12:52 pm
Many of the 2 yr olds that I know dont even want to enter the bathtub and need a lot of coaxing and toys...its the hardest age for swimming lessons. But since you started, why not slowly let the kid get used to it. No need to abort, just slow down.
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amother
Currant
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Sun, Sep 08 2024, 1:00 pm
Your mil sounds like a person who believes in kids independence.
My mil is the same - there’s no gate for crawling babies at the stairs in their house, instead, all the grandkids learned to crawl up and down steps from a nice young age.
Could that be the case here?
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